looking back.
check it:
i got back to athens this evening and i was feeling so good about everything.
then i came across all of the papers that became property of mine over the course of auditions in december for last semester. then i read over the university theatre contract information. first statement refers to how, by auditioning for the season, a student should accept any role that he or she is given no matter the circumstances. cut to: "Quitting a productions after being cast is a breach of contract unless exceptional emergency circumstances occur". cut to end: "Students who exhibit umporfessional behavior and who violate the above agreement and any other policies put forth by a particular director may face one or more of the following disciplinary actions: 1. They may be dropped from the cast; 2: They may not be permitted to audition for the following season..."
i didn't quit, so i guess the first part and quote don't really apply to me. but the second quote does seeing as to how i didn't want to follow through the policies of my director. so...that's why i was "dropped", so to speak. i mean, not that i didn't know that before...it was just weird to read all of that on the paper and think, "wow, i never would have guess that this would all happen to me when i read it for the second time in december...". however, there are no worries about not being about to take part in upcoming auditions seeing as to (and according to what i was told), this situation does not at all call for such outrageous action.
but...
all i kept thinking was- the theatre department must think shit of me now. great.
and i really don't want to endure the unavoidable questions: "why aren't you in polaroid stories anymore?", "why weren't you in class today?", "i heard that you quit...why?"
so, yeah. i feel like crying.
but i'm not because, i've settled this with myself and nothing should get in the way of my feeling confident with my final decision and how i feel about myself due to this entire situation.
yeah.
i'm not supposed to be cussing...i shouldn't have typed the "s" word. at any rate, i'm leaving it. i hate tampering with my naturally-felt emotions.
perhaps i will read all of this tomorrow and have a good laugh.
i'm going to finish unpacking. really good day ahead tomorrow...
i got back to athens this evening and i was feeling so good about everything.
then i came across all of the papers that became property of mine over the course of auditions in december for last semester. then i read over the university theatre contract information. first statement refers to how, by auditioning for the season, a student should accept any role that he or she is given no matter the circumstances. cut to: "Quitting a productions after being cast is a breach of contract unless exceptional emergency circumstances occur". cut to end: "Students who exhibit umporfessional behavior and who violate the above agreement and any other policies put forth by a particular director may face one or more of the following disciplinary actions: 1. They may be dropped from the cast; 2: They may not be permitted to audition for the following season..."
i didn't quit, so i guess the first part and quote don't really apply to me. but the second quote does seeing as to how i didn't want to follow through the policies of my director. so...that's why i was "dropped", so to speak. i mean, not that i didn't know that before...it was just weird to read all of that on the paper and think, "wow, i never would have guess that this would all happen to me when i read it for the second time in december...". however, there are no worries about not being about to take part in upcoming auditions seeing as to (and according to what i was told), this situation does not at all call for such outrageous action.
but...
all i kept thinking was- the theatre department must think shit of me now. great.
and i really don't want to endure the unavoidable questions: "why aren't you in polaroid stories anymore?", "why weren't you in class today?", "i heard that you quit...why?"
so, yeah. i feel like crying.
but i'm not because, i've settled this with myself and nothing should get in the way of my feeling confident with my final decision and how i feel about myself due to this entire situation.
yeah.
i'm not supposed to be cussing...i shouldn't have typed the "s" word. at any rate, i'm leaving it. i hate tampering with my naturally-felt emotions.
perhaps i will read all of this tomorrow and have a good laugh.
i'm going to finish unpacking. really good day ahead tomorrow...