Juiced
So moving to a new town the following happened...
-Started two new jobs
-Moved away from Joel
-Live on my own for the first time ever
-I was already on the path to failing in one of my classes the second week of school
-Dropped said class
-A friend committed suicide
-Was FINALLY approved for a loan a day before school started
-Was depressingly broke
-Inherited a large sum of money and finding out quickly that I may be the only person on this earth who is more stressed by having lots of money than by having none.
-Had a skin viral infection that covered my body in what looked like pimples/chicken pox for over a month.
-Had my shed broken into three times
-Have yet to spend more than two weekends in town.
-Hit four years with Joel
Needless to say it was a roller coaster of emotions for two months. While not all bad and everything is great considering I think it definitely threw me back into emotionland and opened up the door to depressionville and lazytown. The silver lining to this is I finally figured out a way to explain depression to someone who can't comprehend it, like Joel.
It's like a physical injury.
Say like...a dislocated shoulder injury.
At its worse...it's dislocated.
At it's best it's a 0-1/10 but in the back of my head I know it's still injured.
I feel like right now I'm falling somewhere in between...it's sore and flared up but it's definitely not dislocated.
I know my exercises to get it to not be sore again and no ones unprofessional advice helps it heal quicker. The pain meds just barely take the edge off. I just have to be good about doing my exercises every day.
I know my pace and if anyone tries to push me harder I most likely will burn out before I get anywhere.
Some days it's worse than others and sometimes I just need to lay on the couch and baby myself.
It kind of sounds ridiculous but it's the first time I think it truly made sense to him and if that's what it takes then I'll use it. So there's that...
-Started two new jobs
-Moved away from Joel
-Live on my own for the first time ever
-I was already on the path to failing in one of my classes the second week of school
-Dropped said class
-A friend committed suicide
-Was FINALLY approved for a loan a day before school started
-Was depressingly broke
-Inherited a large sum of money and finding out quickly that I may be the only person on this earth who is more stressed by having lots of money than by having none.
-Had a skin viral infection that covered my body in what looked like pimples/chicken pox for over a month.
-Had my shed broken into three times
-Have yet to spend more than two weekends in town.
-Hit four years with Joel
Needless to say it was a roller coaster of emotions for two months. While not all bad and everything is great considering I think it definitely threw me back into emotionland and opened up the door to depressionville and lazytown. The silver lining to this is I finally figured out a way to explain depression to someone who can't comprehend it, like Joel.
It's like a physical injury.
Say like...a dislocated shoulder injury.
At its worse...it's dislocated.
At it's best it's a 0-1/10 but in the back of my head I know it's still injured.
I feel like right now I'm falling somewhere in between...it's sore and flared up but it's definitely not dislocated.
I know my exercises to get it to not be sore again and no ones unprofessional advice helps it heal quicker. The pain meds just barely take the edge off. I just have to be good about doing my exercises every day.
I know my pace and if anyone tries to push me harder I most likely will burn out before I get anywhere.
Some days it's worse than others and sometimes I just need to lay on the couch and baby myself.
It kind of sounds ridiculous but it's the first time I think it truly made sense to him and if that's what it takes then I'll use it. So there's that...