beast ; today could be the day
today could be the day
doojoon/junhyung | pg13 | 676 words | for louvela
it’s been a long time since they’ve been completely honest with each other.
“I love when people are drunk and crying and cannot be anything but honest in that moment.
I love the look in people’s eyes when they realize they’re in love.”
--
it’s been a long time since they’ve been completely honest with each other. late night talks turned into ignoring each other during the day, backs turned towards each other in the middle of the night. junhyung starts to pretend he’s busy, locks himself up in the studio and returns home at an ungodly hour, just so he can avoid it all.
as he slips into bed, he pretends he doesn’t see doojoon stiffen, instead he closes his eyes as he clutches the blankets to his chest, taking deep breaths and forcing himself to fall asleep.
they used to wake up early on purpose. they would slip into the kitchen, making coffee and finding something to eat, they would talk about anything and nothing, hushing each other whenever they got too loud. an hour later dongwoon would stumble into the room, hair a mess and his voice groggy as he reprimanded them for waking him up.
these mornings the kitchen has been empty. these mornings, doojoon habitually wakes up early. he will roll over in bed, staring at junhyung’s back, wondering where it all went wrong.
he wonders if he has been too honest.
they don’t plan for it to happen, they never do. it’s easy to blame someone else for it - maybe it all happens because kikwang dragged them out, or because hyunseung suggests the drinking games, or because yoseob keeps refilling their glasses, or because dongwoon decides to call it an early night and they’re left with just the two of them.
it starts of simple, with a sneer and a mean comment about the girlfriend, then it gets more complicated, with the blaming and the name-calling, and it ends with them yelling at each other while downing another bottle.
junhyung has tears streaming down his face, a glass clutched in his hands as he directs a glare towards doojoon. it’s all your fault, he whispers, all your fucking fault.
doojoon slams his glass on the table, cradling his head in his hands. it’s so fucking easy for you, don’t you see? you can just blame me, say it’s my fault.
but he doesn’t say that he agrees. because he knows it’s his fault, him and his honesty and his big mouth and - they don’t plan for it to happen. but it’s so easy to run his fingers through junhyung’s hair, to whisper sorry’s and please, don’t leave me’s into his ear. it’s so easy to blame it on someone else, on the alcohol, on the stress - but it’s all his fault in the end.
there was a time where they were honest with each other. late night talks lead to sharing secrets and asking for advice, it lead to loaded whispered conversations, arguments and apologies.
there was a time where they would wake up early in the morning. they would stare at each other with blurry eyes, hair sticking up in different directions and voices groggy with sleep. they would giggle over lame jokes, argue over cornflakes and apologize with coffee.
there was a time, somewhere in between, where junhyung saw it happening. he saw the change in doojoon’s eyes, he felt the lingering stares and touches and instead of saying something about it, he held onto it, clung to it and kept the secret hidden deep inside his chest.
because there was a time where his heart would hammer in his chest, where he would spend hours studying doojoon’s face, where he would leave lingering touches and whisper confessions in the middle of the night.
i like you, doojoon whispered one night, i like you and i don’t know what to do about it.
junhyung had stared at doojoon, had seen the way his eyes glistened in the dark, seen the way doojoon clenched his jaw and the way his fingers shook. he saw it all and his heart clenched painfully in response. there was a moment where he needed to hear those words more than anything.
i’m sorry, he says.
there was a time and place for honesty. it just wasn’t now.
a/n: to be honest, this isn't what it was supposed to be and in the end i just decided to post this in fear of screwing it up even more. i hope you like it though!
+
and i've decided to keep my request post open for a while, so i'll have a reason to keep writing. ha. over here if you want.
doojoon/junhyung | pg13 | 676 words | for louvela
it’s been a long time since they’ve been completely honest with each other.
“I love when people are drunk and crying and cannot be anything but honest in that moment.
I love the look in people’s eyes when they realize they’re in love.”
--
it’s been a long time since they’ve been completely honest with each other. late night talks turned into ignoring each other during the day, backs turned towards each other in the middle of the night. junhyung starts to pretend he’s busy, locks himself up in the studio and returns home at an ungodly hour, just so he can avoid it all.
as he slips into bed, he pretends he doesn’t see doojoon stiffen, instead he closes his eyes as he clutches the blankets to his chest, taking deep breaths and forcing himself to fall asleep.
they used to wake up early on purpose. they would slip into the kitchen, making coffee and finding something to eat, they would talk about anything and nothing, hushing each other whenever they got too loud. an hour later dongwoon would stumble into the room, hair a mess and his voice groggy as he reprimanded them for waking him up.
these mornings the kitchen has been empty. these mornings, doojoon habitually wakes up early. he will roll over in bed, staring at junhyung’s back, wondering where it all went wrong.
he wonders if he has been too honest.
they don’t plan for it to happen, they never do. it’s easy to blame someone else for it - maybe it all happens because kikwang dragged them out, or because hyunseung suggests the drinking games, or because yoseob keeps refilling their glasses, or because dongwoon decides to call it an early night and they’re left with just the two of them.
it starts of simple, with a sneer and a mean comment about the girlfriend, then it gets more complicated, with the blaming and the name-calling, and it ends with them yelling at each other while downing another bottle.
junhyung has tears streaming down his face, a glass clutched in his hands as he directs a glare towards doojoon. it’s all your fault, he whispers, all your fucking fault.
doojoon slams his glass on the table, cradling his head in his hands. it’s so fucking easy for you, don’t you see? you can just blame me, say it’s my fault.
but he doesn’t say that he agrees. because he knows it’s his fault, him and his honesty and his big mouth and - they don’t plan for it to happen. but it’s so easy to run his fingers through junhyung’s hair, to whisper sorry’s and please, don’t leave me’s into his ear. it’s so easy to blame it on someone else, on the alcohol, on the stress - but it’s all his fault in the end.
there was a time where they were honest with each other. late night talks lead to sharing secrets and asking for advice, it lead to loaded whispered conversations, arguments and apologies.
there was a time where they would wake up early in the morning. they would stare at each other with blurry eyes, hair sticking up in different directions and voices groggy with sleep. they would giggle over lame jokes, argue over cornflakes and apologize with coffee.
there was a time, somewhere in between, where junhyung saw it happening. he saw the change in doojoon’s eyes, he felt the lingering stares and touches and instead of saying something about it, he held onto it, clung to it and kept the secret hidden deep inside his chest.
because there was a time where his heart would hammer in his chest, where he would spend hours studying doojoon’s face, where he would leave lingering touches and whisper confessions in the middle of the night.
i like you, doojoon whispered one night, i like you and i don’t know what to do about it.
junhyung had stared at doojoon, had seen the way his eyes glistened in the dark, seen the way doojoon clenched his jaw and the way his fingers shook. he saw it all and his heart clenched painfully in response. there was a moment where he needed to hear those words more than anything.
i’m sorry, he says.
there was a time and place for honesty. it just wasn’t now.
a/n: to be honest, this isn't what it was supposed to be and in the end i just decided to post this in fear of screwing it up even more. i hope you like it though!
+
and i've decided to keep my request post open for a while, so i'll have a reason to keep writing. ha. over here if you want.