with your head in the clouds

[wildwhitney]

lets just bury our feelings for one night
forget that we really do give a fuck
all i want to do is walk away
and be content with that decision
and all i can think about is how badly i want to turn around.
i do not want to feel like this anymore
i do not want to think like this anymore
when its right its right
and you cant complain and you cant fight what is right
but thats all the more reason why this is not right
and why this will never be what we both want it to be
how do you pick up and move on when you have to share your life with that person even after separation.
they say to forgive and forget
i say ive done both
but the problem is i can say ive done anything but really have i?
have i forgiven and forgotten?
ive made myself so numb to it all
that ive lost touch with reality
lost touch with who ive worked so hard to be
harping on the nothings of life
the not important
the who really gives a fuck
something i never saw myself doing or being
but at this point in my life i could say that about a lot of things
last time i spoke with my father we had a real conversation by the water
about how life can take such strange turns and sometimes you see it coming and sometimes you dont
but you always have to deal with it the best way that you can
some days i feel like i love in a perfect little fairytale
the next a nightmare i cant wake up from.
when will things be just the way it should be and when will we all learn to even be ok with it
just ok