toga! toga!; or, how i learned that parking services is the greatest crime sydnicate of all time
last night i spent many hours in drunken revelry while wearing a toga. if you've never worn a toga, allow me to discuss the intricacies of wearing one. first off, it's impossible to figure out how to put one on if you're not italian. my people were wearing long cloaks and worshipping trees before the romans came and taught them how to conquer other lands, namely ireland and india. because of this, it took me and wes (a fellow sigep) a minimum of forty fucking minutes to figure out how to make one.
the social was held in a bar, where we drank a lot of beer and i met the kappa delta girls. they are a pretty good looking pledge class, maybe even one of the top three classes this year, with tri-delt and either theta or phi mu. wes and i decide to leave at 12:00, but we both know we're way too drunk to drive. so, we walk the mile back to our dorms. it's not so bad except for the fact that there are hills that piss us both off. steep, steep, hills.
when i got back to the dorms, i should have gone ahead and gotten some sleep, as my following story will illustrate. instead, i figured i'd play AN HOUR OF FUCKING NONSTOP HALO, with the kids that had to stay in tonight. thus, i got sleep at around 2.
my slumber is disturbed at 7:45 by... *phone ringing*
unnnnnh...
"this is harry and james. we're not here right now, but if you leave a message we'll get back to you as soon as possible. thanks!" *BOOP*
"yes, this message for harry dixon. mr. dixon, your car is illegally parked in a north campus deck. if you don't move your car within 45 minutes, it will be towed and you will be find 100 dollars."
this jolts me out of my sleep. no fucking way am i going to get my car towed, but i'll be damned if i have to go back to north campus. that's at least a mile or two mile walk, and with these hills there's no way i'd get there on time. so i have to crawl out of bed, get dressed, shove my contacts into my hungover eyeballs, and run down the stairs before the bus leaves. thankfully, the bus is there and i get to my car with about 15 minutes left to spare.
the parking services fairy didn't forget to leave me a little present: a thirty dollar parking ticket. fuck. well, it was done, i decided, so i drove to snelling, ate breakfast, and came back here, where i've got about 45 minutes to get to my next class.
thirty dollars. that's a lot of money. plus, i'm riding on an expired permit, because those things are 300 FUCKING DOLLARS JESUS CHRIST THAT'S A LOT OF MONEY FOR A HANGY THING FOR MY REAR VIEW MIRROR. the question is, do i park at the sigep house and just walk there when i need it, or give in to the uga mafia and pay my extortion money?
the social was held in a bar, where we drank a lot of beer and i met the kappa delta girls. they are a pretty good looking pledge class, maybe even one of the top three classes this year, with tri-delt and either theta or phi mu. wes and i decide to leave at 12:00, but we both know we're way too drunk to drive. so, we walk the mile back to our dorms. it's not so bad except for the fact that there are hills that piss us both off. steep, steep, hills.
when i got back to the dorms, i should have gone ahead and gotten some sleep, as my following story will illustrate. instead, i figured i'd play AN HOUR OF FUCKING NONSTOP HALO, with the kids that had to stay in tonight. thus, i got sleep at around 2.
my slumber is disturbed at 7:45 by... *phone ringing*
unnnnnh...
"this is harry and james. we're not here right now, but if you leave a message we'll get back to you as soon as possible. thanks!" *BOOP*
"yes, this message for harry dixon. mr. dixon, your car is illegally parked in a north campus deck. if you don't move your car within 45 minutes, it will be towed and you will be find 100 dollars."
this jolts me out of my sleep. no fucking way am i going to get my car towed, but i'll be damned if i have to go back to north campus. that's at least a mile or two mile walk, and with these hills there's no way i'd get there on time. so i have to crawl out of bed, get dressed, shove my contacts into my hungover eyeballs, and run down the stairs before the bus leaves. thankfully, the bus is there and i get to my car with about 15 minutes left to spare.
the parking services fairy didn't forget to leave me a little present: a thirty dollar parking ticket. fuck. well, it was done, i decided, so i drove to snelling, ate breakfast, and came back here, where i've got about 45 minutes to get to my next class.
thirty dollars. that's a lot of money. plus, i'm riding on an expired permit, because those things are 300 FUCKING DOLLARS JESUS CHRIST THAT'S A LOT OF MONEY FOR A HANGY THING FOR MY REAR VIEW MIRROR. the question is, do i park at the sigep house and just walk there when i need it, or give in to the uga mafia and pay my extortion money?