Why I love Baltimore...
Old news, for those of you from Baltimore. For those who are not, the recent thefts of light-poles along busy streets of Baltimore helps to emphasize how truely amazing this city really is! In Berkeley, the only mass-thefts I recall were the pedestrian flags and parking meters... boring!
String of light-pole thefts around the city leaves officials in the dark
It is no simple matter -- not like swiping metal trash cans or lawn furniture -- to cut down and haul away a 30-foot-high aluminum light pole. It is conspicuous and dangerous.
But about 130 of them have disappeared from Baltimore thoroughfares without a trace in recent weeks.
"I've been here 23 years, and I've seen just about everything," said Mike Decker, owner of Decker's Salvage Co. in Baltimore. "People will steal anything here."
...
There have been no arrests, other than a man charged with theft Saturday in East Baltimore after a 30-foot lamppost was spotted sticking out of the window of the station wagon he was driving. But the pole he is charged with taking had been knocked down earlier by a vehicle, and he has not been linked to the pole-napping elsewhere in the city.
...
"Whoever is taking them down from long stretches of roadway is taking every other pole, so it's not as noticeable," Brown said. "They sort of are very meticulous in the way that they are doing it."
...
This, of course, inspired the following column:
Need a new slogan, Baltimore, look to light-pole thef
So now the big shots who run this town are looking for a "branding" slogan? How about "Baltimore: Who's Stealing Our Light Poles?"
...
Look, in other cities, the lowlifes are stealing cars and plasma TV's and expensive fur coats.
Here, hey're stealing giant light poles right off the street!
Apparently in broad daylight, too!
And here's the beautiful part: they haven't just stolen, you know, one or two light poles.
They haven't just stolen five or six light poles.
No, they've stolen 130 of them -- apparently to sell for scrap metal.
One hundred thirty huge light poles!
...
C'mon, you can't exactly throw a 30-foot light pole in the back of the Subaru and blend in with the traffic on Northern Parkway
You need trucks, traffic cones, sophisticated metal-cutting equipment -- the whole nine yards.
And if you're the bad guys, how do you get these poles down without frying yourself on the electrical wiring? Or having the pole topple across the street and block traffic and attract the attention of the cops?
...
How about something like "Baltimore: Is It Me or Is It Dark Around Here?"
Or "Baltimore: You Save Energy Your Way, We'll Save Energy Ours."
Or "Baltimore: Leading the Fight Against Light Pollution."
...
String of light-pole thefts around the city leaves officials in the dark
It is no simple matter -- not like swiping metal trash cans or lawn furniture -- to cut down and haul away a 30-foot-high aluminum light pole. It is conspicuous and dangerous.
But about 130 of them have disappeared from Baltimore thoroughfares without a trace in recent weeks.
"I've been here 23 years, and I've seen just about everything," said Mike Decker, owner of Decker's Salvage Co. in Baltimore. "People will steal anything here."
...
There have been no arrests, other than a man charged with theft Saturday in East Baltimore after a 30-foot lamppost was spotted sticking out of the window of the station wagon he was driving. But the pole he is charged with taking had been knocked down earlier by a vehicle, and he has not been linked to the pole-napping elsewhere in the city.
...
"Whoever is taking them down from long stretches of roadway is taking every other pole, so it's not as noticeable," Brown said. "They sort of are very meticulous in the way that they are doing it."
...
This, of course, inspired the following column:
Need a new slogan, Baltimore, look to light-pole thef
So now the big shots who run this town are looking for a "branding" slogan? How about "Baltimore: Who's Stealing Our Light Poles?"
...
Look, in other cities, the lowlifes are stealing cars and plasma TV's and expensive fur coats.
Here, hey're stealing giant light poles right off the street!
Apparently in broad daylight, too!
And here's the beautiful part: they haven't just stolen, you know, one or two light poles.
They haven't just stolen five or six light poles.
No, they've stolen 130 of them -- apparently to sell for scrap metal.
One hundred thirty huge light poles!
...
C'mon, you can't exactly throw a 30-foot light pole in the back of the Subaru and blend in with the traffic on Northern Parkway
You need trucks, traffic cones, sophisticated metal-cutting equipment -- the whole nine yards.
And if you're the bad guys, how do you get these poles down without frying yourself on the electrical wiring? Or having the pole topple across the street and block traffic and attract the attention of the cops?
...
How about something like "Baltimore: Is It Me or Is It Dark Around Here?"
Or "Baltimore: You Save Energy Your Way, We'll Save Energy Ours."
Or "Baltimore: Leading the Fight Against Light Pollution."
...