More RP shenanigans.
Mother fuck.
Make a list of the least likely things to happen to me.
Fall in love? Fairly high on the list.
Kill my lover? Even higher.
In his sleep like a coward? Higher.
Repeatedly? Yep, higher.
Regain the sanity I lost to the elements through an alliance with the Void? Ok, that one was pretty likely. I've never really enjoyed being on "team good guys."
Wake up one night to the alarming sensation of feeling my ex's soul wandering a nearby plane, and then run smack into him, living, breathing, DEATH TAINTED AND BATSHIT? Now you're just being ridiculous.
But yes, that's my life.
Now Kyoshi is the sadistic fuck, who knew? And boy does he hate me. Can't really blame him for that one. I'm still not sure if this is a good dream or a nightmare.
"This isn't love, Telpeloke. This is obsession," she'd said. Extelle... Oh Void consume it, what have I done? I think I said something about Silas to her, didn't I? Remind me to apologize to her. And I mean apologize, like with jazz hands and puppies. We don't talk about Silas. Maybe she was right about sleeping and eating and all that noise, because I can't believe I was so rude to her.
As much as I hate to admit it, she was right about a lot. She does know a thing or two about love. A woman who can get within a mile of something vaguely resembling tenderness out of Deverin would have to. She also knows a few things about obsession, and empty "love," courtesy of the late Mister Gray.
Am I obsessed? It's true that I don't really relate to the way her face looks when Deverin enters the room, or why my old mentor would risk his entire blood-stained ascension to marry a silly mortal. Whisper's great and all, but I wouldn't put being a god on the line for anybody. Is that bad?
Warm, soft hands were brushing against my face. It startled me because I hadn't realized I was asleep. I squeezed my eyes open, and stiff haziness settled in as confusion washed over me. I murmured something about not being able to move my legs, but a familiar voice interrupted.
"Relax, Telp. Breathe." Speak of the devil. Whisper Tempestbane smiled as she pulled away the covers of Ex's bed for me.
"How'd I get into bed," I managed.
"Damian carried you."
"Did I pass out?"
"Extelle um... persuaded you to get some rest." Right. Suddenly I remembered things more clearly. Whisper pursed her lips: a telling gesture. She knew.
"I'm... going to let that one go since I brought up Silas," I sighed.
"You really did need the rest."
"I know. How long was I out?"
"About twenty-seven hours. I've been here healing you. Telp," she started with that "concerned mom" voice, but she shook her head and seemed to decide against it. "Nah, I'm sure you've been lectured enough."
"Thank you."
"I made you some dinner. My healing magic nourished you sufficiently, but nothing makes you feel better like a good hot meal," she beamed as she added, "cooked with love."
"Whisper, you're sweet but I'm really not-" But I smelled it. Hooooly shit. Garlic toast, and still steaming too. Pasta drenched in tomato sauce with basil and onion. "Merciful god, Tempestbane. That's just not fair."
"Ex told me your favorite. Blame her." She smirked, helping me to the small table in the Stranges' room.
"You could cook for royalty," I said into a fork of noodles as I stuffed my face.
"I have cooked for royalty," she blushed, spooling her portion neatly. "And thank you."
We made small talk for a while. Talking with Whisper was always easy. She had a way of looking at you like if you told her you were a black-hearted serial murderer who spent days systematically obliterating your boyfriend, she'd be fine with it.
Oh, wait. Fuck me.
"What's on your mind, my lady?" She goes to bed with a god and calls me lady. "I mean, besides the whole... well, you know." She laughed kindly, shrugging for my benefit.
"She's not mad at me, is she?"
Whisper shook her head. "For the first time, she's in the same guild as Deverin and Omedon. She's exploring a haunted forest in a brand new world, experimenting with necromancy and healing magic, reuniting with Zedridan, all the while, as always, at her mate's side. I doubt she's capable of anger." The young elf looked absolutely ecstatic to know her best friend was so happy. I shared a smile with her.
"Yeah, true." I paused. "I'm glad."
"Buuuuut?" Whisper hedged, nudging my arm.
"Well, I've just been thinking about what she said. Dreaming about it, I guess, since I've apparently been asleep this whole time."
"What did she say?"
"That I don't love Kyoshi. That I'm just obsessed with his forgiveness, basically." I stared at my disappearing food rather than meet her eyes.
"Well, are you? You would know better than her."
"I... I don't know. I DO want him physically. Especially now that he's all death tainted and pissed off. I like watching him kill; I always have. I would have given him my immortality, but was that love or guilt?" Whisper's silver eyes studied me.
"If you don't know, Telp, you probably don't. I'm sorry."
"Really," I balked. Was it that simple? "You never question whether or not you really love Ven-"
"No," she interrupted. "Not once, not ever. Not when he told me what he is, not any of the times he's been angry with me, no." There was absolutely no doubt in her voice.
I exhaled slowly, and Whisper stood to clear our plates. A few moments passed in thoughtful silence. It wasn't awkward. I needed to think, so she cheerfully left me to my quandaries.
"I wish you'd let me cleanse that curse, or heal that scar." She said after I'd stood to find my cloak.
"Maybe later, Whisper. Obsession or love, I owe him more than a little bit of penance."
"We've all been worrying about what exactly that curse did to you. Did it take away your magic powers?" She took a step towards me.
"No," I hesitated. "I just... Don't want to use them anymore."
"What!? That's worse!"
"Yes. Yes it is." I threw my cloak on, bowed my thanks, and hurried out the door before I had to look at her "let me fix it" face for one more second.
It's much worse.