The Superman Returns Experience
Last night I saw Superman Returns with my brothers. I'll get to the movie in a second, but first I want to touch on the experience. This movie sealed it for me: Tallahassee SUCKS when it comes to going to the movies. I just don't have a good time anymore. Here is what went wrong:
- For the first half of the movie, the sound was too low. It almost sounded muted, like the speakers were malfunctioning. I had to strain to hear what people were saying in the non-action scenes. What was even more ridiculous was that the theater next to us (also showing Superman Returns) was ROCKING. The bass we felt from it was incredible. So why the hell did we get the sucky theater!?
- Once people realized that the sound was low enough to where you could hear every comment someone made, the jackasses showed up in full force. By the end of the movie it had become "cool" for these idiots to yell stuff at the screen. "You rock my socks, supaman!" "Yo Supes! You need to get with that!" And then there was the one person in town who hadn't seen the trailers on TV and in theaters where Superman gets shot in the eye and the bullet bounces off. "OH! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! AHAHAHAHA OH SUPERMAN YOU THE GREATEST! OH OH OH!" >=( Of course, there was the obligatory laughing at inappropriate times, a freaking crying baby somewhere down in front, and someone making fart noises over in the corner. Such is the moviegoing experience in Tallahassee. :-(
- Thirty minutes into the film, they shut off the A/C. And what happens when you have hundreds of people packed into a tiny theater? Yeah. It got hot. By the last thirty minutes, I was SO uncomfortable, sitting there in my seat and just sweating. Now, I have a low tolerance for heat (goes hand-in-hand with my high tolerance for cold), and I thought at first that maybe it was just me. That maybe I was having some sort of breakdown; why am I so HOT!? Then Brian leaned over and said "Jeez why is it so hot in here!?" and I felt a lot better. After the movie ended and the credits were rolling, almost everyone filing out had a sweat stain on the back of their shirt from where they'd been leaning on the back of the seat. That is RIDICULOUS.
All-in-all, it was a pretty horrible experience. Oh, the movie? Yes, there was a movie, wasn't there? A lot went right but there was a lot that went wrong, as well. I personally think it was a mistake to link it up so much with the '70s films. There were many moments and lines that might've worked back then, but now they just seem campy and in some cases, downright silly. Singer and Co. could have easily done their return story without the links to the past. The action scenes were great. Superman's plane rescue at the beginning of the film saved the movie for me! It was amazing, and I hope that if they make a sequel we see more of that.
Comic book movies these days tend to focus on the people "behind the mask" but Superman is different because Clark Kent IS the mask. Brandon Routh did a good job, but that was another part I wish they had changed. Occasionally, he seemed like he was just trying to do his best Christopher Reeve impression. Reeve is NOT Superman. He just played him. I would've preferred it if Routh made Superman (and Clark) his own character. Kate Bosworth was decent as Lois Lane. I still think that giving Lois a kid was a major mistake. And the "big twist" at the end was just stupid. Mallrats said it best: Superman would need a Kryptonite condom for that to happen! Whatever... Spacey as Lex Luthor was awesome. Easily the best character of the movie, mainly because he wasn't doing a Gene Hackman impression. He made the character his own, as everyone else should have done.
The end of the movie bugged the hell out of me, as a comic purist. Luthor grows a kryptonite island, upon which Superman lands and promptly gets the crap kicked out of him by Lex and his henchmen. Then he comes back, lifts the whole island out of the ocean, and throws it into space!? WTF!? So when he's on the island, he's weak enough to take a beating. But he's then able to lift the whole thing... Yeah, that makes sense. Come on, Singer. You're better than that! That was almost as retarded as Superman "turning back time" in the first movie. >=( Superman in the hospital was a joke as well, and the whole scene seemed to be inserted to just drum up some needless drama. Oh well...
So that's that! I will definitely see this movie again in Imax. Seeing it in an awesome, jackass-free theater will probably help me to enjoy it more - it definitely did with Batman Begins!
- For the first half of the movie, the sound was too low. It almost sounded muted, like the speakers were malfunctioning. I had to strain to hear what people were saying in the non-action scenes. What was even more ridiculous was that the theater next to us (also showing Superman Returns) was ROCKING. The bass we felt from it was incredible. So why the hell did we get the sucky theater!?
- Once people realized that the sound was low enough to where you could hear every comment someone made, the jackasses showed up in full force. By the end of the movie it had become "cool" for these idiots to yell stuff at the screen. "You rock my socks, supaman!" "Yo Supes! You need to get with that!" And then there was the one person in town who hadn't seen the trailers on TV and in theaters where Superman gets shot in the eye and the bullet bounces off. "OH! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! AHAHAHAHA OH SUPERMAN YOU THE GREATEST! OH OH OH!" >=( Of course, there was the obligatory laughing at inappropriate times, a freaking crying baby somewhere down in front, and someone making fart noises over in the corner. Such is the moviegoing experience in Tallahassee. :-(
- Thirty minutes into the film, they shut off the A/C. And what happens when you have hundreds of people packed into a tiny theater? Yeah. It got hot. By the last thirty minutes, I was SO uncomfortable, sitting there in my seat and just sweating. Now, I have a low tolerance for heat (goes hand-in-hand with my high tolerance for cold), and I thought at first that maybe it was just me. That maybe I was having some sort of breakdown; why am I so HOT!? Then Brian leaned over and said "Jeez why is it so hot in here!?" and I felt a lot better. After the movie ended and the credits were rolling, almost everyone filing out had a sweat stain on the back of their shirt from where they'd been leaning on the back of the seat. That is RIDICULOUS.
All-in-all, it was a pretty horrible experience. Oh, the movie? Yes, there was a movie, wasn't there? A lot went right but there was a lot that went wrong, as well. I personally think it was a mistake to link it up so much with the '70s films. There were many moments and lines that might've worked back then, but now they just seem campy and in some cases, downright silly. Singer and Co. could have easily done their return story without the links to the past. The action scenes were great. Superman's plane rescue at the beginning of the film saved the movie for me! It was amazing, and I hope that if they make a sequel we see more of that.
Comic book movies these days tend to focus on the people "behind the mask" but Superman is different because Clark Kent IS the mask. Brandon Routh did a good job, but that was another part I wish they had changed. Occasionally, he seemed like he was just trying to do his best Christopher Reeve impression. Reeve is NOT Superman. He just played him. I would've preferred it if Routh made Superman (and Clark) his own character. Kate Bosworth was decent as Lois Lane. I still think that giving Lois a kid was a major mistake. And the "big twist" at the end was just stupid. Mallrats said it best: Superman would need a Kryptonite condom for that to happen! Whatever... Spacey as Lex Luthor was awesome. Easily the best character of the movie, mainly because he wasn't doing a Gene Hackman impression. He made the character his own, as everyone else should have done.
The end of the movie bugged the hell out of me, as a comic purist. Luthor grows a kryptonite island, upon which Superman lands and promptly gets the crap kicked out of him by Lex and his henchmen. Then he comes back, lifts the whole island out of the ocean, and throws it into space!? WTF!? So when he's on the island, he's weak enough to take a beating. But he's then able to lift the whole thing... Yeah, that makes sense. Come on, Singer. You're better than that! That was almost as retarded as Superman "turning back time" in the first movie. >=( Superman in the hospital was a joke as well, and the whole scene seemed to be inserted to just drum up some needless drama. Oh well...
So that's that! I will definitely see this movie again in Imax. Seeing it in an awesome, jackass-free theater will probably help me to enjoy it more - it definitely did with Batman Begins!