(no subject)
Is Christmas really this week? Are you kidding? Wow, time is flying by. Nothing too new, school, work, repeat. Ya know. Emotionally I've been up and down lately. Some days are really, really good, and I'm very happy. But at the same time, others are down, down, down and the way I feel on those days is worse than I think I can describe in writing.
I have, however, been finding comfort in people whom I never thought I would. Felicia and Krisanne are always there for me, and vice versa, but lately, they have truly been acting as my backbone. I am glad that I have good, girl, friends. I've never really been a person who hungout with many girls, but right now, it's kind of nice. Justin has also been a big help to me lately. I've always been on and off the radar with Justin, mostly only seeing him when I was with Randy, or Tony, or someone. But lately, we have both been putting in effort to call eachother and make sure we get together. It's really fucking nice, and I really enjoy his company and our talks a hell of a lot.
I feel like I keep watching people who I used to be friends with, or who I am still friends with now, just fall apart. I'm tired of losing my friends to substances. I'm really sick and tired of it. I tend to act like a mother to a lot of people, so that part of me wants to step up and do all I can to help. But sometimes, even that is not enough to help someone change. Change comes from within oneself, it cannot be forced on by another. An individual has to want to change, and decide to change, before it actually happens.
I have, however, been finding comfort in people whom I never thought I would. Felicia and Krisanne are always there for me, and vice versa, but lately, they have truly been acting as my backbone. I am glad that I have good, girl, friends. I've never really been a person who hungout with many girls, but right now, it's kind of nice. Justin has also been a big help to me lately. I've always been on and off the radar with Justin, mostly only seeing him when I was with Randy, or Tony, or someone. But lately, we have both been putting in effort to call eachother and make sure we get together. It's really fucking nice, and I really enjoy his company and our talks a hell of a lot.
I feel like I keep watching people who I used to be friends with, or who I am still friends with now, just fall apart. I'm tired of losing my friends to substances. I'm really sick and tired of it. I tend to act like a mother to a lot of people, so that part of me wants to step up and do all I can to help. But sometimes, even that is not enough to help someone change. Change comes from within oneself, it cannot be forced on by another. An individual has to want to change, and decide to change, before it actually happens.