(no subject)
Decided to only pack one bag. Well, one bag and one box, but the box is filled with memories. Memories and shoes. You can't expect a girl to leave behind her shoes?
The train leaves in a few hours, just enough for me to do some last minute stops.
The letter to Louis is at the top of my bag. It is the most important thing, but I am not sure if I can do it. I am still thinking about sending it by mail, instead of giving it to him personally.
There is however not a lot of time to think about it. I lock the door of my flat and step out, for the last time. I drop the keys off and walk through the streets. I love Paris in the fall, especially when it's sunny, like today. I will miss it, but it's only a few hours away and I know I will visit again. I drop off some letters to family at the post office. They need to know where I will be staying and I figured this would be better then sending out an e-mail.
As I walk out, Louis' letter is still safe in my bag. His place is only a few minutes from here and I decided I own him an explanation, the one in the letter doesn't cut it, I need to say that I am sorry, sorry for hurting him, sorry for loving him, for leaving him.
It will take me 3 minutes to find the courage to knock at his door. The minute it will take him to get to the door seems even longer. His face will light up when he sees me and I will try to stop the hug that he is giving me. Tears will form in my eyes and he notices it.
'What is wrong?' That cute French accent.
'Nothing.' I will say as I wipe my face.
'Don't lie. You know you are terrible at lying.'
'I came to give you this.' And I will give him the letter.
'What is it?'
'An apology. An explanation.'
'What for?'
'Just. Don't be mad at me... I have to go now. I still have to go to some places. Please, just don't be mad.'
'What for? Jane', a pause, 'what is going on. Tell me!' His grip is tightening. 'Tell me now.'
'I can't. Please, just read it. It is important.'
He rips open the letter and starts reading. It will be to late for me to walk away and he will convince me to stay. Stay with him, love him, never leave him.
All of that would happen if he was at home, but he isn't. I leave the letter at the door and just hope he won't be mad.
As I walk away I turn around once before I walk around the corner. He just came home and he saw the letter. Tears fall down my face as I walk to the metro and leave. He will be mad...
The train leaves in a few hours, just enough for me to do some last minute stops.
The letter to Louis is at the top of my bag. It is the most important thing, but I am not sure if I can do it. I am still thinking about sending it by mail, instead of giving it to him personally.
There is however not a lot of time to think about it. I lock the door of my flat and step out, for the last time. I drop the keys off and walk through the streets. I love Paris in the fall, especially when it's sunny, like today. I will miss it, but it's only a few hours away and I know I will visit again. I drop off some letters to family at the post office. They need to know where I will be staying and I figured this would be better then sending out an e-mail.
As I walk out, Louis' letter is still safe in my bag. His place is only a few minutes from here and I decided I own him an explanation, the one in the letter doesn't cut it, I need to say that I am sorry, sorry for hurting him, sorry for loving him, for leaving him.
It will take me 3 minutes to find the courage to knock at his door. The minute it will take him to get to the door seems even longer. His face will light up when he sees me and I will try to stop the hug that he is giving me. Tears will form in my eyes and he notices it.
'What is wrong?' That cute French accent.
'Nothing.' I will say as I wipe my face.
'Don't lie. You know you are terrible at lying.'
'I came to give you this.' And I will give him the letter.
'What is it?'
'An apology. An explanation.'
'What for?'
'Just. Don't be mad at me... I have to go now. I still have to go to some places. Please, just don't be mad.'
'What for? Jane', a pause, 'what is going on. Tell me!' His grip is tightening. 'Tell me now.'
'I can't. Please, just read it. It is important.'
He rips open the letter and starts reading. It will be to late for me to walk away and he will convince me to stay. Stay with him, love him, never leave him.
All of that would happen if he was at home, but he isn't. I leave the letter at the door and just hope he won't be mad.
As I walk away I turn around once before I walk around the corner. He just came home and he saw the letter. Tears fall down my face as I walk to the metro and leave. He will be mad...