Did you think I'd forget? Couldn't be more of a mess...
After everything why?
Why can't I stop loving you?
Why can't I stop wondering what you are doing?
And how you are feeling...
And if you miss me as much as I am missing you.
I wish I did hate you.
As much as I say I do.
Because I know I could do better.
But I just don't want to.
I hate the fact.
That you have that power over me.
That I allow you to effect me as much as I do.
How can you forget everything?
Like all of our moments we had?
It was hard.
But I never thought about giving up on you.
The way you gave up on me.
I miss laughing with you.
I miss waking up next to you.
I miss just holding you close to me and having nothing, absolutely nothing in the entire world between us.
Our jokes.
Or just holding your hand walking down the street.
Everything.
Is gone.
Easy enough for you.
A hell for me.
I wish I hated you.
I try to and I just can't.
People tell me you are not worth it.
My heart tells me otherwise.
I am such a stupid girl.
...I'm meeting someone tonight, really good looking guy from New Haven....I should be excited right? Well I'm not.