i thought u should kno that ur not making this easy...
-Picking up the Pieces It blew my mind into a million pieces, to think I would be doing that to myself. Why do I do what I do, I don't know It started out so innocently, what happened? I let myself go too far, and now I'll have to recover. When will the pain stop, when will I be myself again? I feel so empty. When will I see the light? I realize what I am doing, but everytime I try to recover, I slip and fall right back onto my face. All I want is to feel beautiful, all I want is to feel loved--<<-random thoughts/poems->>
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How come you have enough time to go out and make other people fall in love with you, but you don't have enough time to pay attention to the one who already does.
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well yea enough of that. today was dec. altho my back is absolutely killing me. it feels soooo sore. n ugh its just a pain to bend over n shit. psh there goes my sex life.lol. yea i dunno bout wut happend with jon. hm. weird im not sure wuts going on with that. but either way im satisfied. hes my bestfriend theres nothing more i can ask for i guess. so i offficially look like quAzie modo. im all hunched over. grrrr. im not getting a boob reduction. i mean they arent even THAT big. i like my boobs! they just REALLI hurt my back. n i got a lot more growin to do. wen they get all ugly n big n just 100X more painful. then i will. but for now ill put up with it. i love how im rammbling on and on about nothing at all. wow. yea well that was today. wow i realli need a vacation b4 i become an alcoholic. i guess rachel may be right. it does seem as tho im trying to forget n attempting to resolve everything thru alcohol. n ofcourse im just realizing this now cuz i ignore everything. sooo yea i think i should chill with that shit. i think i should tone down teh drinking from 4 time a week to about 2..? lol who knows. leavin for texas 3 weeks from today. im pumped. either way im set. actually i lied. i just wanna get the fuck outta here. n come back with a nice tan .. come back as a whole nwe person. i would've had a break from everything and everyone n just kinda come back" fresh" if u will. yea things will def be better after i come back from vaca. o well. later
ps. prob snow day tomorrow :)
<<<-->>>
How come you have enough time to go out and make other people fall in love with you, but you don't have enough time to pay attention to the one who already does.
<<<--->>>
well yea enough of that. today was dec. altho my back is absolutely killing me. it feels soooo sore. n ugh its just a pain to bend over n shit. psh there goes my sex life.lol. yea i dunno bout wut happend with jon. hm. weird im not sure wuts going on with that. but either way im satisfied. hes my bestfriend theres nothing more i can ask for i guess. so i offficially look like quAzie modo. im all hunched over. grrrr. im not getting a boob reduction. i mean they arent even THAT big. i like my boobs! they just REALLI hurt my back. n i got a lot more growin to do. wen they get all ugly n big n just 100X more painful. then i will. but for now ill put up with it. i love how im rammbling on and on about nothing at all. wow. yea well that was today. wow i realli need a vacation b4 i become an alcoholic. i guess rachel may be right. it does seem as tho im trying to forget n attempting to resolve everything thru alcohol. n ofcourse im just realizing this now cuz i ignore everything. sooo yea i think i should chill with that shit. i think i should tone down teh drinking from 4 time a week to about 2..? lol who knows. leavin for texas 3 weeks from today. im pumped. either way im set. actually i lied. i just wanna get the fuck outta here. n come back with a nice tan .. come back as a whole nwe person. i would've had a break from everything and everyone n just kinda come back" fresh" if u will. yea things will def be better after i come back from vaca. o well. later
ps. prob snow day tomorrow :)