Shower invites...

[riseliketides]

I know that etiquette questions can sometimes draw quite the debate, but I'm hoping that we can avoid that with this one

Comments

[biiiitch]

i vote send it. i really never look at shower invites as people "looking for gifts" unless it's someone i don't talk to often. if they can make it to the shower, great. if they can't, that's alright too. i think to save face and to save feelings, invite them.

[wint3rhart]

I would say invite them, and make it clear (phone, separate email, whatever) that you're not looking for extra gifts since you know they're making a special effort to be at the wedding already. If they still don't care to come, they can always rsvp "no."

[sacchrinetokyo]

I say there's no harm in sending them an invitation. I've never looked at being invited to a function as someone just trying to get gifts out of me. Maybe on the inside of the invitations for the out OOT'ers your mom can write a little note letting them know she understands the travel situation, but she wishes they could join in the fun or something.

[miss_moops]

I don't look at an invitation as a request for gifts. I look at it as an invitation for my presence (not presents! hehe!). I think it means that "I want you to be there, to share in my joy," and they'll probably call or something and say "we can't come because XYZ," which gives you the opportunity to say " well, I understand, but I'll be thinking of you." Very gracious on everybody's part, fosters good feelings.

[1983]

I'm only sending invitations to those I think will most likely come. So mostly in state/within a couple hours.

I'm not sure the etiquette but that's how I'm doing it.