Episode 1: Peter Parker's Pilot

[webball]

A. [Action | 460 Stone St | Outside]

[When Peter woke up, yawned, kissed his sleeping wife on the shoulder, clambered out of bed and walked towards the bathroom with his eyes shut... he immediately toppled down the stairs and landed on his face. Jumping up with alarm, his brain clicked awake, synapses firing, as he quickly listed the Wrongs in his

Comments

B! Super Cheerful Peter, meet Super Grouchy Sniper!

[bye_to_yer_head]

..Then why'd you call th' garage?

Re: B! Super Cheerful Peter, meet Super Grouchy Sniper!

[webball]

[A garage? Peter scratches his head. That was unexpected.]

Aha! That, pal, is the question that... er, YOU should be asking! Why DID I call the garage asking for pizza?

...I called a garage? I really just dialed randomly, but...hm. Answer this for me, then. Which garage did I call? What town are you located in?

[bye_to_yer_head]

But I'm asking you mate.

Actually you probably called everyone in this troppo town, the phone line is a mite tetchy. But I guess that's one way t' get yerself a pizza. The town's called Mayfield. You must be new.

*Though from the way Sniper talks it sounds like you may have called a garage in Australia. That's gonna be a harsh delivery charge.*

[webball]

[What in the...! Who did he just call? Crocodile Dundee? He'd better not be charging for long distance...]

Uh... yes. Yes I am, obviously, because I did not know all of that, there. Hm.

...Say, does Australia make good pizza?

[bye_to_yer_head]

... Not really, no. This place probably doesn't either. I haven't checked.

[webball]

Sorry, that was a little blunt. I've just never spoken to an Aussie before! So, heh, yeah.

...You're the garage, right? Do you get a lot of customers? People in this town seem fond of walking... and being blissfully unaware of things.

[bye_to_yer_head]

I .. uh...

*Okay then. Moving on.*

They're all a bunch of bloody pikers if that's what you mean. And no, we don't. Unless you count th' blokes who bring in their blenders thinkin' we can fix that.

*yeah, he's bored as all get out.*

[webball]

My kinda job! Getting paid to read the newspaper sounds okay with me. Beats taking photos so your editor can use them for slander on a weekly basis.

[bye_to_yer_head]

Maybe you'll luck out an' get a job loike that. I bet yer job pays better though.

*This being 1950, ANYTHING would pay better.*

[webball]

[You'd be surprised, Australian guy. You'd be surprised. They don't call Jameson "Ol' Skinflint" for nothin'...]

Listen, this is a dumb question, but... you wouldn't happen to know the way out of this place, would ya? Kinda got a wife and aunt to get back to... and also, I'm really starting to miss jeans. Who'da thunk?

[bye_to_yer_head]

As far as I can tell there isn't one. There's a highway but if you go down it long enough you jus' end up back here. Only been here a month or so though, haven't ried all th' exits yet.

[webball]

Oy. I am going to have the worst headache, I just know it.

You know, I never got your name, Stranger.

[bye_to_yer_head]

It only gets worse too mate. Jus' wait til we're invaded by zombies or aliens or who knows what else. Giant fuzzy caterpillers or somethin' knowin' this place.

I'm Sniper. I'm one 'f th' mechanics over at the garage.

[webball]

[...what is this madhouse they refer to as Mayfield.]

I'm just going to consciously block that out and never think about it again. I think that's best.

But I'm Peter, good meeting you. ...S-so, "Sniper"... is that an ironic nickname that makes fun of your basketball skills, or...?

[bye_to_yer_head]

That's been my current plan. S'not workin' all that well though. Specially when the town leaks over into yer house.

.. Basketball?

No, I'm an Assassin. Snipin' is what I do. And it's my name.

*Yep. Totally casual.*

[webball]

...OH.

So, um... you don't live on... uh, Stone St. do you? Because I... hope you don't live on this terrible ol' street here.

I hope you live very far away from this street.