(no subject)
Hello again! Sorry I ain't post. It's hard to get back into the swing of it, but I'm trying. And I figure I really should start writing in here again, because I'm feeling very stressed lately, and writing in a journal's supposed to help that, so. Mostly I'm anxious about not finding a job, and as a result I'm hypersensitive to any sort of criticism or rejection or basically any social interaction that does not go as I planned it, and it's causing me a lot of problems and I'm really sick of it.
I get plenty of exercise and I eat good food and I don't hang around people who stress me out and I certainly don't have work-related stress (that's the PROBLEM), so those things are off the list as culprits. I think it's just the economy and the work thing, and graduating from college and going from a world of constant success and accomplishment to not even being able to get a crappy minimum wage job. I'm going to start meditating and doing breathing exercises and maybe enroll in a yoga class. I'm also taking a class in the fall (Arabic), which I think should help a LOT.
So that's the emotions side of things and I ain't one to always be writing about my emotions so I apologize for that, it's just that they're really bumming me out right now and I'm tired of being in tears all the time. I think when I find a job it will be OK, and in the meantime I have to learn to accept that we are in an economic recession and the job market is crap and it's not really my fault that I can't get a job.
(Not trying to get sympathy, just writing all this stuff down so it's out of my system. I think journals have
a really good brain cleansing effect.)
Hey! I just got an e-mail back from one of the million jobs I applied for. It's a Production Assistant job at University of Iowa Press. It won't be many hours if I get it, but it'll be something -- and good experience, too. That'll lift my spirits for a while!
Art things: not enough of them lately, a little bit of drawing once in a while, some sewing, and I've been playing my trumpet again. I'd like to start painting again, but I really would like to get an easel first. This is partly an excuse, but partly really genuine, as it's both inconvenient and scary to paint with oils without an easel in an apartment that you do not actually own - I constantly fear getting stuff in the carpet that will never come out. So an easel would help. My dad said he'd make me one but I'm also going to check Craigslist. The violin: needs repairs AGAIN; I'll have to wait until I have a job to get that done. Again, sort of an excuse, but I really don't want to bum any more money off my parents during this unemployment than I need to.
Spain: it's coming! It's just really hard to figure out what to talk about!
Eta got Mallorca, by the way... That's a little scary, considering how much time I spent saying, "Oh, that wouldn't happen HERE" while I was living there. It seems to me like kind of a stupid thing to do, considering the number of tourists that are there. I don't imagine Eta wants to make this into an international thing. I guess they were aiming for those poor policemen and probably knew what they were doing, but it seems like a pretty big risk for them to take. Que asco de gente, as one of my Mallorquin friends said on Facebook...
I get plenty of exercise and I eat good food and I don't hang around people who stress me out and I certainly don't have work-related stress (that's the PROBLEM), so those things are off the list as culprits. I think it's just the economy and the work thing, and graduating from college and going from a world of constant success and accomplishment to not even being able to get a crappy minimum wage job. I'm going to start meditating and doing breathing exercises and maybe enroll in a yoga class. I'm also taking a class in the fall (Arabic), which I think should help a LOT.
So that's the emotions side of things and I ain't one to always be writing about my emotions so I apologize for that, it's just that they're really bumming me out right now and I'm tired of being in tears all the time. I think when I find a job it will be OK, and in the meantime I have to learn to accept that we are in an economic recession and the job market is crap and it's not really my fault that I can't get a job.
(Not trying to get sympathy, just writing all this stuff down so it's out of my system. I think journals have
a really good brain cleansing effect.)
Hey! I just got an e-mail back from one of the million jobs I applied for. It's a Production Assistant job at University of Iowa Press. It won't be many hours if I get it, but it'll be something -- and good experience, too. That'll lift my spirits for a while!
Art things: not enough of them lately, a little bit of drawing once in a while, some sewing, and I've been playing my trumpet again. I'd like to start painting again, but I really would like to get an easel first. This is partly an excuse, but partly really genuine, as it's both inconvenient and scary to paint with oils without an easel in an apartment that you do not actually own - I constantly fear getting stuff in the carpet that will never come out. So an easel would help. My dad said he'd make me one but I'm also going to check Craigslist. The violin: needs repairs AGAIN; I'll have to wait until I have a job to get that done. Again, sort of an excuse, but I really don't want to bum any more money off my parents during this unemployment than I need to.
Spain: it's coming! It's just really hard to figure out what to talk about!
Eta got Mallorca, by the way... That's a little scary, considering how much time I spent saying, "Oh, that wouldn't happen HERE" while I was living there. It seems to me like kind of a stupid thing to do, considering the number of tourists that are there. I don't imagine Eta wants to make this into an international thing. I guess they were aiming for those poor policemen and probably knew what they were doing, but it seems like a pretty big risk for them to take. Que asco de gente, as one of my Mallorquin friends said on Facebook...