It's done.
I need to break up with him.
I need to talk to a counselor or a therapist or a something!
I need to stop getting into relationships with guys that are mean to me. I kind of realized the other day that I like assholes and I like guys that treat me like shit. I feel like I sound like someone who was abused. Emotional abuse. I feel like I might have experienced emotional abuse while I grew up, and now I think it's normal. It's not normal. However my past two boyfriends haven't treated me that amazingly. And that's like years of damage now. Fuck.
I am going to call my sister tomorrow and find out if she knows someone that I can go and see. Then obviously, see them, talk to them. Hopefully they can help me. Give my clarity. Then break up with him. It's fucking over. There is nothing left. He doesn't text me, he doesn't call me. When I see him, I just want to fight with him. I want him to give me attention, so I settle for negative attention and I assume that this kind of attention is better than no attention at all. I am doing the exact same thing with him that I did with my ex. It's fucked up. It's stupid. I am wasting my time and my life. I hate it.
And another new problem - now I am questioning my friendship with his sister: Why would she let me get into a relationship with her brother if she knew what he was like? If I knew someone would hurt someone else and I cared about that person, I would not let them get into a shitty relationship like this. It's just kind of like, thanks a lot. I haven't been this jaded and hurt in so long. Thanks for bringing me back to something that took me years and YEARS to overcome. And this anger is now being directed towards both of them. How the fuck can you trust anyone?
I need to talk to a counselor or a therapist or a something!
I need to stop getting into relationships with guys that are mean to me. I kind of realized the other day that I like assholes and I like guys that treat me like shit. I feel like I sound like someone who was abused. Emotional abuse. I feel like I might have experienced emotional abuse while I grew up, and now I think it's normal. It's not normal. However my past two boyfriends haven't treated me that amazingly. And that's like years of damage now. Fuck.
I am going to call my sister tomorrow and find out if she knows someone that I can go and see. Then obviously, see them, talk to them. Hopefully they can help me. Give my clarity. Then break up with him. It's fucking over. There is nothing left. He doesn't text me, he doesn't call me. When I see him, I just want to fight with him. I want him to give me attention, so I settle for negative attention and I assume that this kind of attention is better than no attention at all. I am doing the exact same thing with him that I did with my ex. It's fucked up. It's stupid. I am wasting my time and my life. I hate it.
And another new problem - now I am questioning my friendship with his sister: Why would she let me get into a relationship with her brother if she knew what he was like? If I knew someone would hurt someone else and I cared about that person, I would not let them get into a shitty relationship like this. It's just kind of like, thanks a lot. I haven't been this jaded and hurt in so long. Thanks for bringing me back to something that took me years and YEARS to overcome. And this anger is now being directed towards both of them. How the fuck can you trust anyone?