the fraying fringe of plotulation
My deep thoughts are murky. I think the river of my consciousness is on loam.
Emotions that I felt while watching, in no particular order: worry, amusement, annoyance, rage, sympathy, concern, irritation, boredom.
Emotions I didn't feel: joy, sorrow, exhilaration. (they may come later)
So that happened. It was funny, I will give it that. The Peter and Derek show was awesome comedy, Stiles managed to squeeze in two or three good zingers in between getting pummeled and the plot randomly leaving him in his room to mope while action happened elsewhere.
Almost everything that happened to Jackson was unintentionally funny.
Nothing really came together, though, emotionally, thematically or ~plotulally. Instead of OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! at the revelations, I went, 'wait what?' time after time. I don't even know if I can fanwank together a timeline that isn't made of insane troll logic.
Questions, queries, comments:
Peter Hale: WHEN DID HE HAVE TIME TO GROW HIS GOATEE. Anyway, it's not too out there that he'd be happy to be the thinking devil on Derek's shoulder for now, although Derek is clearly having to do a lot of not-thinking-about-it to deal with the past there. Derek's been pretty much down to the bare bones of survival pragmatism since... always on the show, so I'll buy it.
Lydia: how did she even get the idea to go seek out Stiles, though? Like, who told her Stiles was no longer missing? Etc etc etc. I don't fucking know. But how did she get Derek from the train depot to the Hale house back in episode mumblemumble, anyway? Fugue state superstrength, whatever. Wasn't she also barefoot? Who cares! LA LA LA LA. Then I guess she wakes up from her state next to a half-dead Derek and a sooty, naked Peter and is like 'uh, ok den' and just goes home and tries to forget about it? ::hands:: Next episode she's happily watching lacrosse with Stiles's dad and Scott's mom, ie the sheriff and the nice nurse from when she was in a coma. OKAY DEN.
Stiles: What is even his plot arc in this episode. He's grabbed from the lacrosse field, presumably manhandled into a car, driven to the Argent house and thrown into the basement. There he finds Boyd and Erica, two of his classmates, being tortured with electricity. Granpa Argent beats him up all blah blah blah Scott blah blah blah his best friend beaten to a pulp blah blah. Then granpa lets him go and Stiles... goes home, hugs his dad (failing to tell him that he was beaten up by his fucking principal!) and TAKES A NAP. He tells no one about the two kids in the Argent basement. Like... um. What. He's just like whatever about them now? All run out of fucks to give? I can see him feeling a bit beaten down (hur hur hur), but this is Scott level callous disregard for the lives of other people. He doesn't have to RESCUE them, he just has to text Derek or something! WTF WTF WTF WTF. Also, the kidnapping/beating served absolutely no purpose, plot-wise. It made Stiles depressed for five minutes, but other than that, nothing happened. Scott never found him or got anywhere near him, and his cutely if unrealistically bruised little face never changed anyone's mind about anything. The whole hero/lacrosse awesome discussion with the sheriff was ringing pretty fucking hollow considering STILES JUST LEFT TWO TEENAGERS TO BE TORTURED AUGH. Congrats, kid, you're good at sports. I can't deal. Also, go take those creepy ass gifts back to fucking Macy's, you weirdo. How did you pay for that TV anyway, you're a 16-yo with no job.
(ETA: k, someone suggested that Stiles spilled the location of warehouse to Gerard under torture, which would better explain the utter despondence. )
Chris Argent: ugh, finally getting his head out of his ass. I'm good with you, Chris Argent. That was a lot of conditioning to break through.
Allison: I don't even care about her right now. Hopefully her dad grounds her for the whole summer.
Scott: okay, yeah, this show really wanted me to believe that Scott went to Deaton before talking to Stiles. Without ever talking to Stiles? Or were we supposed to kind of assume Stiles knew? Idk. I don't know why it even matters at this point. Meanwhile, it's pretty amazing how casually and easily Scott can just fucking FLAY Derek. You might be an alpha, but you're not mine? Wow. WOW. That was just fucking unnecessary. And him forcing Derek to give gramps the bite was so fucking creepy and horrible. The cunning plan was very cunning, but. My emotions. Also, hang on. How the fuck did Deaton even kno-- NEVER MIND PHLEBOTNUM. All medicines are the same ladida.
(ETA: oh right, werewolves can smell cancer, that was a whole thing.nvm. )
Jackson: uh... I guess his issues are resolved now because... Lydia... er... his parents... identity... wat. Never fucking mind. Also, why are his eyes blue, okay? He was bitten. Is this because he died (twice!) and was, er, ~reborn a werewolf? So now... um. Fuck it. I laughed like a drain when he did the dramatic naked terminator unfolding. Hey Colton you pretty.
(ETA: so much bibble babble about his birth parents and absolutely no resolution or explanation there--but I guess all he needed was the reminder that not everyone hated him as much as he hated himself? um. )
Derek: NOTHING GOOD EVER HAPPENS TO DEREK AND HE FAILS AT EVERYTHING AND THEN PEOPLE LAUGH AT HIM. This dude has had if not good, then at least fucking logical reasons for everything he's done this season, and still everyone hates him and/or laughs at him and/or tells him he sucks. He's so fuck out of luck that his best bet is now the dude who murdered his sister for power. Also he's basically a... submissive alpha. Well, that makes sense, characterisation-wise. It probably makes him feel some approximation of safe. At least Isaac apparently decided to stay with him. That's nice, I guess. Poor Isaac is the character who has had close to the same amount of shit poured on him anyway, so he and Derek should be bros. With Peter pretty much calling the shots from the back seat, Derek and Isaac can just hang out and cuddle a bit. In the five minutes they'll have before the big bad of next season descends on them OH MY GOD.
Boyd and Erica: there you are. We hardly noticed you. (ETA: they were appropriately horrified at Stiles being smacked around, although tbh Erica did more damage in ep2x3 with that hunk of metal, so...)
Gerard: uh, wait. Hang on. Where did this asshat go. (ETA: although nice mirroring of Peter killing his niece to live, I guess. )
Deaton & Morell: so NOW you're here all pro-active and helpful, CSI-ing it up. Looking hot in your badass leather gear. Kay, kay.
DID YOU GUYS NOTICE THAT NOBODY FUCKING DIED IN THIS FUCKING EPISODE? A lot of stabbing and bleeding and lying around looking dead: no actual dying. Jeff Davis, you're a big softie. Thanks for that small boon.
ETA: I didn't hate everything! There were several scenes that were good on their own, it's just that none of them seemed to belong to the same plot snarl, and nobody reacted to anything like human beings. Episode 10 was SO GOOD and emotionally satisfying and plot-resolving, and then 11 and 12 were basically written by a bored monkey chained to a typewriter. A monkey set on undermining all the emotional arcs of the season.
In conclusion: wat. Help. Fanwank with me here.
I may have to edit this feels blart later.
Emotions that I felt while watching, in no particular order: worry, amusement, annoyance, rage, sympathy, concern, irritation, boredom.
Emotions I didn't feel: joy, sorrow, exhilaration. (they may come later)
So that happened. It was funny, I will give it that. The Peter and Derek show was awesome comedy, Stiles managed to squeeze in two or three good zingers in between getting pummeled and the plot randomly leaving him in his room to mope while action happened elsewhere.
Almost everything that happened to Jackson was unintentionally funny.
Nothing really came together, though, emotionally, thematically or ~plotulally. Instead of OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! at the revelations, I went, 'wait what?' time after time. I don't even know if I can fanwank together a timeline that isn't made of insane troll logic.
Questions, queries, comments:
Peter Hale: WHEN DID HE HAVE TIME TO GROW HIS GOATEE. Anyway, it's not too out there that he'd be happy to be the thinking devil on Derek's shoulder for now, although Derek is clearly having to do a lot of not-thinking-about-it to deal with the past there. Derek's been pretty much down to the bare bones of survival pragmatism since... always on the show, so I'll buy it.
Lydia: how did she even get the idea to go seek out Stiles, though? Like, who told her Stiles was no longer missing? Etc etc etc. I don't fucking know. But how did she get Derek from the train depot to the Hale house back in episode mumblemumble, anyway? Fugue state superstrength, whatever. Wasn't she also barefoot? Who cares! LA LA LA LA. Then I guess she wakes up from her state next to a half-dead Derek and a sooty, naked Peter and is like 'uh, ok den' and just goes home and tries to forget about it? ::hands:: Next episode she's happily watching lacrosse with Stiles's dad and Scott's mom, ie the sheriff and the nice nurse from when she was in a coma. OKAY DEN.
Stiles: What is even his plot arc in this episode. He's grabbed from the lacrosse field, presumably manhandled into a car, driven to the Argent house and thrown into the basement. There he finds Boyd and Erica, two of his classmates, being tortured with electricity. Granpa Argent beats him up all blah blah blah Scott blah blah blah his best friend beaten to a pulp blah blah. Then granpa lets him go and Stiles... goes home, hugs his dad (failing to tell him that he was beaten up by his fucking principal!) and TAKES A NAP. He tells no one about the two kids in the Argent basement. Like... um. What. He's just like whatever about them now? All run out of fucks to give? I can see him feeling a bit beaten down (hur hur hur), but this is Scott level callous disregard for the lives of other people. He doesn't have to RESCUE them, he just has to text Derek or something! WTF WTF WTF WTF. Also, the kidnapping/beating served absolutely no purpose, plot-wise. It made Stiles depressed for five minutes, but other than that, nothing happened. Scott never found him or got anywhere near him, and his cutely if unrealistically bruised little face never changed anyone's mind about anything. The whole hero/lacrosse awesome discussion with the sheriff was ringing pretty fucking hollow considering STILES JUST LEFT TWO TEENAGERS TO BE TORTURED AUGH. Congrats, kid, you're good at sports. I can't deal. Also, go take those creepy ass gifts back to fucking Macy's, you weirdo. How did you pay for that TV anyway, you're a 16-yo with no job.
(ETA: k, someone suggested that Stiles spilled the location of warehouse to Gerard under torture, which would better explain the utter despondence. )
Chris Argent: ugh, finally getting his head out of his ass. I'm good with you, Chris Argent. That was a lot of conditioning to break through.
Allison: I don't even care about her right now. Hopefully her dad grounds her for the whole summer.
Scott: okay, yeah, this show really wanted me to believe that Scott went to Deaton before talking to Stiles. Without ever talking to Stiles? Or were we supposed to kind of assume Stiles knew? Idk. I don't know why it even matters at this point. Meanwhile, it's pretty amazing how casually and easily Scott can just fucking FLAY Derek. You might be an alpha, but you're not mine? Wow. WOW. That was just fucking unnecessary. And him forcing Derek to give gramps the bite was so fucking creepy and horrible. The cunning plan was very cunning, but. My emotions. Also, hang on. How the fuck did Deaton even kno-- NEVER MIND PHLEBOTNUM. All medicines are the same ladida.
(ETA: oh right, werewolves can smell cancer, that was a whole thing.nvm. )
Jackson: uh... I guess his issues are resolved now because... Lydia... er... his parents... identity... wat. Never fucking mind. Also, why are his eyes blue, okay? He was bitten. Is this because he died (twice!) and was, er, ~reborn a werewolf? So now... um. Fuck it. I laughed like a drain when he did the dramatic naked terminator unfolding. Hey Colton you pretty.
(ETA: so much bibble babble about his birth parents and absolutely no resolution or explanation there--but I guess all he needed was the reminder that not everyone hated him as much as he hated himself? um. )
Derek: NOTHING GOOD EVER HAPPENS TO DEREK AND HE FAILS AT EVERYTHING AND THEN PEOPLE LAUGH AT HIM. This dude has had if not good, then at least fucking logical reasons for everything he's done this season, and still everyone hates him and/or laughs at him and/or tells him he sucks. He's so fuck out of luck that his best bet is now the dude who murdered his sister for power. Also he's basically a... submissive alpha. Well, that makes sense, characterisation-wise. It probably makes him feel some approximation of safe. At least Isaac apparently decided to stay with him. That's nice, I guess. Poor Isaac is the character who has had close to the same amount of shit poured on him anyway, so he and Derek should be bros. With Peter pretty much calling the shots from the back seat, Derek and Isaac can just hang out and cuddle a bit. In the five minutes they'll have before the big bad of next season descends on them OH MY GOD.
Boyd and Erica: there you are. We hardly noticed you. (ETA: they were appropriately horrified at Stiles being smacked around, although tbh Erica did more damage in ep2x3 with that hunk of metal, so...)
Gerard: uh, wait. Hang on. Where did this asshat go. (ETA: although nice mirroring of Peter killing his niece to live, I guess. )
Deaton & Morell: so NOW you're here all pro-active and helpful, CSI-ing it up. Looking hot in your badass leather gear. Kay, kay.
DID YOU GUYS NOTICE THAT NOBODY FUCKING DIED IN THIS FUCKING EPISODE? A lot of stabbing and bleeding and lying around looking dead: no actual dying. Jeff Davis, you're a big softie. Thanks for that small boon.
ETA: I didn't hate everything! There were several scenes that were good on their own, it's just that none of them seemed to belong to the same plot snarl, and nobody reacted to anything like human beings. Episode 10 was SO GOOD and emotionally satisfying and plot-resolving, and then 11 and 12 were basically written by a bored monkey chained to a typewriter. A monkey set on undermining all the emotional arcs of the season.
In conclusion: wat. Help. Fanwank with me here.
I may have to edit this feels blart later.