You can't keep on like this.
Last summer it was poppy from diabetes.
This summer it's aunt betty from cancer.
It's been a difficult few weeks. With everything that's happening with Jimmy and now we know we only have a few more days left with aunt betty. She's just sleeping peacefully in her own home with her family around her. It just brings back so many memories from last summer when poppy was here. We just watched him sleep and talked to him. I know he heard me and felt me kiss him. I just held his hand said goodnight and told him I'd see him in the morning. Kissed his stubbly cheek and just watched him breathe for a little while. He was only breathing about once every 20-30 seconds if that and then i walked up stairs to go to sleep. Around 10 my brohter came up and told me he stopped breathing. It was weird because it wasn't scary to me at all seeing him. The back of his neck and the palms of his hands stayed warm for a little while but he got so cold everywhere else. Some woman came to pronounce him and take him away so we all said our goodbyes and i couldn't watch them take him away so I had to go upstairs and keep myself in my room. I saw the van in the driveway but I didn't look again until it was gone. I miss him everyday. Our birthday's coming up..he's was the 13th and I'm the 15th. His name will always be on our cake.
Jesse, Jaimie, Jen, Amanda, and Dayna I love you and I don't know what I would do without you.
Matty too. We weren't always close but now that we've grown up a lot we can relate to each other a lot more. I really value our relationship, I can tell you anything and you'll always help me out. And you know I'm always here for you. I love you.
Summer is coming to an end and I wouldn't say I have any regrets I just wish some things happened differently. But I learned a few things too. I'm done letting people walk all over me and use me. It happened too much this summer with multiple people and I'm not letting my guard down anymore. Whenever I do I end up getting hurt, and I'm done.
Senior year is supposed to be filled with study halls and goofing off but mine won't. I took a pretty hard schedule and It's gunna be work but I'm okay with it. I'll be seeing my girlies everyday again which will be nice. Fucking a couple weeks left, let's make memories.
I really want my birthday to be awesome this year. 18! Let's make it happen.
This summer it's aunt betty from cancer.
It's been a difficult few weeks. With everything that's happening with Jimmy and now we know we only have a few more days left with aunt betty. She's just sleeping peacefully in her own home with her family around her. It just brings back so many memories from last summer when poppy was here. We just watched him sleep and talked to him. I know he heard me and felt me kiss him. I just held his hand said goodnight and told him I'd see him in the morning. Kissed his stubbly cheek and just watched him breathe for a little while. He was only breathing about once every 20-30 seconds if that and then i walked up stairs to go to sleep. Around 10 my brohter came up and told me he stopped breathing. It was weird because it wasn't scary to me at all seeing him. The back of his neck and the palms of his hands stayed warm for a little while but he got so cold everywhere else. Some woman came to pronounce him and take him away so we all said our goodbyes and i couldn't watch them take him away so I had to go upstairs and keep myself in my room. I saw the van in the driveway but I didn't look again until it was gone. I miss him everyday. Our birthday's coming up..he's was the 13th and I'm the 15th. His name will always be on our cake.
Jesse, Jaimie, Jen, Amanda, and Dayna I love you and I don't know what I would do without you.
Matty too. We weren't always close but now that we've grown up a lot we can relate to each other a lot more. I really value our relationship, I can tell you anything and you'll always help me out. And you know I'm always here for you. I love you.
Summer is coming to an end and I wouldn't say I have any regrets I just wish some things happened differently. But I learned a few things too. I'm done letting people walk all over me and use me. It happened too much this summer with multiple people and I'm not letting my guard down anymore. Whenever I do I end up getting hurt, and I'm done.
Senior year is supposed to be filled with study halls and goofing off but mine won't. I took a pretty hard schedule and It's gunna be work but I'm okay with it. I'll be seeing my girlies everyday again which will be nice. Fucking a couple weeks left, let's make memories.
I really want my birthday to be awesome this year. 18! Let's make it happen.