(no subject)
Title: Last Tuesday, When I Waved at You, Did You Wave Back?
Rating: G
Character(s)/Pairing(s): onesided!Sam/Kurt, Kurt/Blaine, mentions of other
Author Notes: Just how, I'd like for Kum to develop once Kurt is back at McKinley.
Warning: Kurt acts like he canonically does around or about Blaine, around and about Blaine.
Disclaimer: Spoilers for 2x16. I don't own Glee.
Summary: Ten Tuesdays, after Kurt's return to McKinley, in the life of Sam Evans.
04/05/11
When Sam sees the figure in a white coat and top hat walking down the hallway of McKinley like he own it, he wonders if he's just imagining things. He blinks to make sure, and yes it is Kurt Hummel.
“Hello Sam.” Kurt says, smiling.
“Hi,” he smiles back. Hearing a genially friendly voice was such a rarity at McKinley nowadays.
“Um...I'm glad you're back.”
"It's good to be back."
04/12/11
“Brittany, Finn and Sam are all failing their classes.” Leave it to Mr. Schuester to announce it to the entire club like that. Sam melted into his chair when everyone turned to stare at him. Before, Brittany could define 'failing' or Santana could make a comment to the effect of 'Dumbass duo'-Brittany was always an exception to this kind of mockery. “Kurt, I'm going to need you to tutor the three of them for the exams. They won't let students who fail any of their classes go to Nationals.”
“Why me?” Kurt had his patented “bitch please” expression on. After his return to McKinley, Kurt was gentler and smiled through comments that would have normally risen ire, seeming happy to be back in the choir. However, that wore off within a day, and the bitchiness and impatience for idiocy had come back in all its glory.
“You're ahead of your studies anyways, thanks to Dalton.”
“Dalton's education system isn't that good. They don't even have sex education.”
“Kurt, I understand it's a sacrifice, but you have to do it for the good of the team. I'll even help with tutoring Finn.” Rachel offers leaning forward eagerly. “Actually, it might be a good idea to have a New Directions study session-”
“Um.” Sam raises his hand. “Kurt doesn't have to tutor me. I'll just cram and get help from the resource center again.”
“It's alright, Sam. One more isn't going to make any difference. This will cut in the amount of dates I can have with Blaine though.”
“How are things with you two?” Tina asks.
“Well, if you must know great. He's so romantic. He sang me song to me at Breadstix last night.”
Sam smiles. He's happy that there is someone who finally appreciates Kurt, that Kurt doesn't have to be alone anymore. Being with someone-anyone- is better than being alone.
04/19/11
“So what do you think?” Sam sits perched at the end of his bed, watching as Kurt finishes reading the last page of his essay on the Civil War. It was the first tutoring session available. Rachel and Kurt were splitting the duty of helping Finn study, and Tina had agreed to help tutor Brittany (Santana was still acting distant, only talking about her new girlfriend from time to time loudly whenever Brittany was around).
“Pretty good, actually.”
“Really?” Nobody had ever told Sam that his school work was 'pretty good'. He had got answers like “You'll pass anyways” or “adequate”.
“Yes. Your arguments were well thought out and backed up with evidence. The composition, while rough at times, worked for the most part. I have to tell you that the grammar and spelling are still horrible, but excluding that I see no reason why you can't get a B or even an A on this paper. I've marked down the mistakes you did make.” Kurt smiles holding out the red pen for Sam to see.
“Thanks.”
“You're welcome. Now if we get this done before eight, I will watch an episode of that show you're obsessed with.”
“Firefly.” Sam grins, taking the essay and walking over to his computer desk, petting the chair next to him to offer a seat for Kurt.
Kurt took it. Before, he starts to explain his corrections to Sam, he just stares at him for a second.
“You know you're not stupid, right?”
Sam swallowed. Nobody had ever told Sam he wasn't stupid either
04/26/11
“I'm sorry, Blaine and I have a date at The Lima Bean. Besides it doesn't really seem like my type of thing.” Kurt says apologetically after Sam asks if he wants to go see Thor with Artie, Finn, Mike, Puck and him the next weekend. “But thank you for thinking about including me in your New Directions boys' outing.”
“Well, the invitation actually comes from Puck, and everyone else too.” Sam rubs the back of his head as he speaks, wondering how often Kurt used to feel left out from New Directions activities before Dalton. “I'm just the messen-”
He pauses, as a familiar tune is heard down the hallway.
~Guppy face, trouty mouth~ Is that what people's lips look like where you come from in the south~
The freshman cheerio thankfully answered her cellphone. It didn't stop her and her friends from looking back and laughing at him though. He wonders who had recorded that song and uploaded onto the McKinley Gossip blog for ringtone downloads. Santana swore up and down it wasn't her, and Sam believed her-she owed him one and anonymous bullying wasn't really her thing. Was it Finn? Quinn? Jacob? Sam has no clue. As if he wasn't enough of a laughing stock already-the stupid guy whose girlfriend cheated on him with his best friend.
Kurt looks after the girls rolling his eyes and muttering something like “people never learn”, before turning back to Sam. His eyes open a little wider when he saw the expression on Sam's face.He had been too late to cover up hurt with carefree self-deprecation this time.
“Never mind, it's just jealously really.” Kurt's lifts his hand to Sam's mouth to gently touch his fingertip against Sam's lips. “It's not a bad thing.”
Within seconds, Kurt realizes who he's with and where they are, and just as quickly drops his hand. “I'll talk to Santana and Puck. I think we'll be able to find a solution to this little problem.” He doesn't walk away too quickly. But he leaves his history text book behind.
Sam, meanwhile, ignores the bell when it rings, and just stands still. Finally he presses a finger against the place Kurt had touched on his lips.
05/03/11
“So this one was so worried about Pavarotti at first, but I explained to him that it was just molting and he calmed down. His panic was so cute.” Blaine reaches over and pinches Kurt's cheek lightly. Kurt laughs and cuddles into his boyfriend's shoulder.
Sam blows bubbles into his soda and tries not to gag. He had seen sickening sweet couples before-hell he had been half of one until last February-but these two? They're were constantly acting like that around each other. The only other couple he had seen come as close was Tina and Mike with their 'Asian kisses', but for the most part even they weren't that bad.
They were at a planning dinner for Nationals. Kurt had managed to convince Mr. Schuester to let Blaine come with them because “He's transferring next year, so he might as well get used to be around everyone.”
Also, who even brings up a dead pet while sweet talking their boyfriend?
At least, Kurt was happy. But Sam had been 'happy' when he was Quinn, and look where that ended? Besides, beneath Kurt's happiness there lurked something unpleasant. Kurt never crack jokes or told people off or made sarcastic comments around Blaine. He didn't have the same cool and composed “I know I'm better than all of you” demeanor. He just looked at Blaine all the time an adoring expression on his face. He always ordered the same food as Blaine, always tried to take a bite at the same time or drink a sip of his drink. Everything about it, reminds Sam of himself last fall.
“So adorable.” Blaine coos. He was always calling Kurt adorable. “Isn't he adorable?”
That last question was aimed at Sam. He lifted his mouth from the straw and looked at Kurt.
“No.”
He could have thought of quite a few words that could describe Kurt, some of which came from feelings that confused, and that he only thought about late at night when he couldn't sleep, and others that confused him less. Adorable was not one of those words. Adorable was for puppies or his little sisters.
Unfortunately, the little exchange between Blaine and him had taken place during a lull in the rest of the conversations his team mates were having around him. Most of his team mates were looking at him with various degrees of suprise or horror (he thought he saw Mercedes grin for a second though. She did seem annoyed whenever Kurt invited Blaine to these events). Santana simply raised an eyebrow. Kurt and Blaine had moved apart to look at him.
“Oh what I mean to say is Kurt isn't so much adorable as he is terrifying. Dude will kill you if you use the wrong version of 'there' in a sentence.”
“Sorry, I'm trying to improve your grammar and your life.” Kurt says with mock offense. Everybody laughs and things go back to the way they were. Kurt puts his hand over Blaine's on top of the table and snuggles into his shoulder.
The bubbles in Sam's glass grow bigger.
05/10/11
Sometimes they talk. It was good to have a friend again, after what happened between him and Finn in the winter. In the hallways before class, while waiting for glee club to begin, during a rare break from studying. It was usually about classes or whatever was going on in the Fuinn/Finchel triangle that week, or something else. From time to time Sam will end up showing Kurt one of his impressions. Kurt unlike Santana or Quinn, never looked at him like he was an alien, just slightly amused. Sometimes he even laughed. Once, Kurt talked about his mother and her death. He remembers feeling stupid because he couldn't think of anything to say afterwards, so instead he just held Kurt's hand.
But today it was about Blaine. Or more specifically about how he and Kurt got together.
“And then he said that I moved him, and he kissed me.” Kurt's eyes shone with a dreamy light, as he kicked his feet up.
Lori Menari.
“So is that it?” Sam asks. Kurt seems finished with the story. But that couldn't be the end, right? Kurt didn't decide to date him after just that, right?
“What else is there? Now, let's get back to reviewing Animal Farm.” Kurt picks up the book.
“Dude realized he was in love just because of a song, when you were singing together for months? Seems odd.”
“Love is different for everyone. Blaine was just a bit slower than me.”
“You just told me he said you had no sex appeal the week before, and then there was that thing with kissing Rachel.”
“It doesn't matter to me! He loves me now. It doesn't matter if he kissed Rachel, or said I wasn't sexy, or said I was like Kar-” Kurt stops in mid sentence.
“He said you were like who?”
“No one. I'd like you to leave now.”
“Really because it sounded like you were going to say 'Karofsky'?”
“I said I'd like you to leave now.” Kurt's lips were now pressed into a thin line.
Sam shakes his head and grabs his bookbag, stomping out of the room. He apologizes quickly to Mr Hummel and Ms. Hudson for the noise (Kurt's dad looks at him stone-faced, and Sam guesses he might have heard them talking about 'Karofsky' and Blaine in the same sentence). It's only when he gets outside that he realizes that he probably lost his only friend at McKinley. He doesn't know why it annoys him so much to see Kurt not value himself as much as he should, aside from his own experiences. Maybe, that was the only reason he needed.
He takes out his phone and starts to text a long message. He apologizes for being rude about something that obviously meant a lot to Kurt, he writes that he's sure Blaine does love Kurt as much as Kurt loves him (or thinks that he loves him anyway), and that he forget the last thing Kurt was going to say (if only because he hates thinking that Kurt was with a guy who compared him to the person who made Kurt's life hell).
Half an hour later Kurt sends back a message. “Meet me in the library tomorrow and we'll finish up.”
He wonders if Kurt will ever smile at his impressions again.
05/17/11
When, he sees Kurt in the library without his laptop on ( to download music, or obsessively check that weird site tumblr), he knows something is wrong.
“Did something happen?”
“Sam,” Kurt seems surprised. Not that Sam can blame him. They hadn't really talked since the night the week before. Whenever, they had tutoring sessions, Kurt ignored all his attempts to make small talk. During glee club meetings he was always sure to sit as far away as possible from Sam. Everyone assumed he said something to offend Kurt. He let them think that, it wasn't that far from the truth anyways. “It's nothing really.”
Sam doesn't leave though, optioning to sit in front of Kurt and stares.
Kurt doesn't hold out long, before explaining. “I had my first fight with Blaine just now on the phone.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Sam asks, not really expecting an answer. When Kurt doesn't say anything, he gets up and starts to go.
“He didn't like that I wouldn't answer texts from him when I was at Breadstix with Puck.”
“You were at Breadstix with Puck?” While, the two had become closer when Puck helped get Karofsky to transfer and then again when they found out Jacob had been the one who uploaded Trouty Mouth to the school website and 'dealt' with the situation, it was still odd to think about Puck and Kurt hanging out one on one.
“He needed advice about...” Kurt pauses and apparently thinks better about what he was going to say. “About something.”
“If it's about Quinn don't worry, I'm over it.”
And he was. It still hurt that she had cheated on him, but he understand why she did it better now (she wasn't much different from him), and it wasn't like they were that in love anyways. He doubts that she would do the same thing she did to Finn and him, to Puck somehow too.
“Well, anyway, Blaine asking me why I didn't text him back, and when I told him I was helping a friend, he accused me having an affair with Puck.”
“What?”
“My exact reaction. After a very long conversation, I ended up calling him possessive and uptight, and then I hung up on him.”
“Well, tha-”
“And now I feel bad about it. I was possessive before we got together. I had no right to get mad at him for worrying.”
You kinda of do.
“Don't worry,” is what Sam actually says, leaning in to rub Kurt's back. “I'm sure it will all work out. I mean Quinn thought I was having an affair with Beiste and that worked out.”
Yeah, go ahead and compare his relationship to your relationship that ended. In cheating. That will make him feel better.
Kurt just laughs and smiles kinda of sadly, like he has a habit of doing.
“Hey, Kurt tell your boyfriend to back off!” Puck stomps over them. “He's left me a million messages.”
“I'm sorry. I'm currently not talking to him.”
“Really? Cool. Who need 'em after all? You two want to hang out with the Pucksaurus tonight instead.”
“I'm up for it. Sam?” Kurt stands up. The bell had rung.
“Sure.” He grins following the other two out of the library to the next class.
When, Blaine shows up that afternoon in the choir room with a banquet of roses and luke warm apology, that plan is automatically out the window. Sam doesn't let the mask split for long-a polite smile is on his face again, within seconds of seeing Kurt squeal, and throw his arms around Blaine. Puck still glares, but then again no one would question that.
05/24/11
Sometimes, when he's looking at the glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling, Sam wonders if there was an elseworld somewhere out there, where the duet between Kurt and him hadn't been canceled. A universe where they became friends. A universe where Sam hadn't started dating Quinn . A universe where Sam had been able to stop the bullying before it escalate to the level it had. A universe where Kurt never met Blaine. He wonders what it would be like.
Yeah, right, and I'm Superman on Earth-245. He looks behind him, at Kurt sitting on his bed texting. At the look on his face Sam could guess who he was texting.
“Does he still text you the word 'courage' when you're at school?” Sam asks.
Kurt looks up and glares at him. “You're suppose to be practicing Geometry questions for exams, not looking at me.” Sam rolls his eyes, but goes back to his work without comment. “And not that it's any of your business, but yes he still does. He's so thoughtful.”
It takes more than just writing a word to have courage.
“What?”
“Nothing. I was just reading a question out loud.”
As Sam answers question 32 b (What is the area of the following square, if the length of BD is 2 root 2?), he thinks that maybe Earth-245's Sam isn't doing his homework and Earth-245's Kurt isn't being texted by another boy. Maybe that universe's Sam is being pressed into his mattress, Kurt on top of him, hands running through each other's hair....
The tip of Sam's pencil breaks off. He must have pushed it too hard against the paper. He takes the sharpener out of his pencil box and looks back at Kurt again. He was still reading his messages, laughing softly to himself.
Sam has no right to lecture anyone about courage.
05/31/11
Sam finishes singing “Just to See You Smile” and looks up smiling as the gleeclub claps. Finals were over (he managed to get a B+ average), and in between practicing Nationals numbers, Mr. Schuester had given them a new assignment: 'sing a song as a message to someone '. A typically boring and unproductive assignment, in Kurt's words.
The girls were whispering about it having something to do with Quinn while Sam took his seat. He just shakes his head. It wasn't about Quinn for sure. Well, maybe it was just a little. But...
“So, who's the lucky girl?” Kurt asks with that little half smile.
Sam gulps. “Nobody you know.”
06/07/11
“Blaine and I broke up.”
“What?” Sam leans over. They were sitting beside each other in the sticky airport chairs, waiting for to fly to New York for Nationals. Everyone else was either buying coffee, in the bathroom or sitting in the corner talking excitedly about what they wanted to do in New York. “Why?”
“A lot of reasons.” Kurt sighs picking at the front of his shirt. “We weren't as happy as everyone thought. We fought all the time, and when we weren't fighting it wasn't really anything mind blowing. Just pleasant really.”
“Oh.”
“But I was okay with it. It was just enough having a boyfriend. But than last week I was watching Brittany and Santana together, and seeing how easy they were around each other, made me realize that I'd never have that with Blaine.” He looks at Sam now his eyes steady. “Whenever I was around him I was worried about living up to his expectations of who I thought he wanted to be. It's nobody’s fault really, but it's not something I want anymore. I want what Brittany and Santana have, I want what Carole and my dad have.”
“How did he take it?” Sam asks, a few moments after Kurt finished speaking, wondering if Blaine had fought to keep his relationship with Kurt or not.
“He tried to convince me that we could work it out, but he eventually agreed that we are better of as friends.”
“Are you okay, dude?”
“Mostly. I'm a little annoyed that he gave up so quickly, but then again Blaine has history of easily getting over heartbreak. Maybe I do too.”
Sam feels the urge to say everything in that moment., to blurt it all out and for all the secrets to be uncovered. But then Kurt goes on to say:
“I'm giving up on love for now. No more trying to be with someone for the sake of not being alone. When it happens I want both the other person and me to be completely ready, and not to rush into it this time.”
Sam closes his mouth. “I'm sure someone will see how awesome and kind you are one day. I'm going to go get some water. Be back in a minute.” He clapped Kurt on the back and started to walk off, towards the vending machines.
It wouldn't be fair right now for either of them. He was still so confused and Kurt did need time. Maybe tomorrow he'd tell Kurt one of the secrets he had been carrying, and then maybe a little while afterwards he'd tell the other secrets. If it felt right that is.
Kurt looks after him, almost like he realized something. Then, he shakes it off and waves over Mercedes and Rachel who were coming back from their coffee run.
Rating: G
Character(s)/Pairing(s): onesided!Sam/Kurt, Kurt/Blaine, mentions of other
Author Notes: Just how, I'd like for Kum to develop once Kurt is back at McKinley.
Warning: Kurt acts like he canonically does around or about Blaine, around and about Blaine.
Disclaimer: Spoilers for 2x16. I don't own Glee.
Summary: Ten Tuesdays, after Kurt's return to McKinley, in the life of Sam Evans.
04/05/11
When Sam sees the figure in a white coat and top hat walking down the hallway of McKinley like he own it, he wonders if he's just imagining things. He blinks to make sure, and yes it is Kurt Hummel.
“Hello Sam.” Kurt says, smiling.
“Hi,” he smiles back. Hearing a genially friendly voice was such a rarity at McKinley nowadays.
“Um...I'm glad you're back.”
"It's good to be back."
04/12/11
“Brittany, Finn and Sam are all failing their classes.” Leave it to Mr. Schuester to announce it to the entire club like that. Sam melted into his chair when everyone turned to stare at him. Before, Brittany could define 'failing' or Santana could make a comment to the effect of 'Dumbass duo'-Brittany was always an exception to this kind of mockery. “Kurt, I'm going to need you to tutor the three of them for the exams. They won't let students who fail any of their classes go to Nationals.”
“Why me?” Kurt had his patented “bitch please” expression on. After his return to McKinley, Kurt was gentler and smiled through comments that would have normally risen ire, seeming happy to be back in the choir. However, that wore off within a day, and the bitchiness and impatience for idiocy had come back in all its glory.
“You're ahead of your studies anyways, thanks to Dalton.”
“Dalton's education system isn't that good. They don't even have sex education.”
“Kurt, I understand it's a sacrifice, but you have to do it for the good of the team. I'll even help with tutoring Finn.” Rachel offers leaning forward eagerly. “Actually, it might be a good idea to have a New Directions study session-”
“Um.” Sam raises his hand. “Kurt doesn't have to tutor me. I'll just cram and get help from the resource center again.”
“It's alright, Sam. One more isn't going to make any difference. This will cut in the amount of dates I can have with Blaine though.”
“How are things with you two?” Tina asks.
“Well, if you must know great. He's so romantic. He sang me song to me at Breadstix last night.”
Sam smiles. He's happy that there is someone who finally appreciates Kurt, that Kurt doesn't have to be alone anymore. Being with someone-anyone- is better than being alone.
04/19/11
“So what do you think?” Sam sits perched at the end of his bed, watching as Kurt finishes reading the last page of his essay on the Civil War. It was the first tutoring session available. Rachel and Kurt were splitting the duty of helping Finn study, and Tina had agreed to help tutor Brittany (Santana was still acting distant, only talking about her new girlfriend from time to time loudly whenever Brittany was around).
“Pretty good, actually.”
“Really?” Nobody had ever told Sam that his school work was 'pretty good'. He had got answers like “You'll pass anyways” or “adequate”.
“Yes. Your arguments were well thought out and backed up with evidence. The composition, while rough at times, worked for the most part. I have to tell you that the grammar and spelling are still horrible, but excluding that I see no reason why you can't get a B or even an A on this paper. I've marked down the mistakes you did make.” Kurt smiles holding out the red pen for Sam to see.
“Thanks.”
“You're welcome. Now if we get this done before eight, I will watch an episode of that show you're obsessed with.”
“Firefly.” Sam grins, taking the essay and walking over to his computer desk, petting the chair next to him to offer a seat for Kurt.
Kurt took it. Before, he starts to explain his corrections to Sam, he just stares at him for a second.
“You know you're not stupid, right?”
Sam swallowed. Nobody had ever told Sam he wasn't stupid either
04/26/11
“I'm sorry, Blaine and I have a date at The Lima Bean. Besides it doesn't really seem like my type of thing.” Kurt says apologetically after Sam asks if he wants to go see Thor with Artie, Finn, Mike, Puck and him the next weekend. “But thank you for thinking about including me in your New Directions boys' outing.”
“Well, the invitation actually comes from Puck, and everyone else too.” Sam rubs the back of his head as he speaks, wondering how often Kurt used to feel left out from New Directions activities before Dalton. “I'm just the messen-”
He pauses, as a familiar tune is heard down the hallway.
~Guppy face, trouty mouth~ Is that what people's lips look like where you come from in the south~
The freshman cheerio thankfully answered her cellphone. It didn't stop her and her friends from looking back and laughing at him though. He wonders who had recorded that song and uploaded onto the McKinley Gossip blog for ringtone downloads. Santana swore up and down it wasn't her, and Sam believed her-she owed him one and anonymous bullying wasn't really her thing. Was it Finn? Quinn? Jacob? Sam has no clue. As if he wasn't enough of a laughing stock already-the stupid guy whose girlfriend cheated on him with his best friend.
Kurt looks after the girls rolling his eyes and muttering something like “people never learn”, before turning back to Sam. His eyes open a little wider when he saw the expression on Sam's face.He had been too late to cover up hurt with carefree self-deprecation this time.
“Never mind, it's just jealously really.” Kurt's lifts his hand to Sam's mouth to gently touch his fingertip against Sam's lips. “It's not a bad thing.”
Within seconds, Kurt realizes who he's with and where they are, and just as quickly drops his hand. “I'll talk to Santana and Puck. I think we'll be able to find a solution to this little problem.” He doesn't walk away too quickly. But he leaves his history text book behind.
Sam, meanwhile, ignores the bell when it rings, and just stands still. Finally he presses a finger against the place Kurt had touched on his lips.
05/03/11
“So this one was so worried about Pavarotti at first, but I explained to him that it was just molting and he calmed down. His panic was so cute.” Blaine reaches over and pinches Kurt's cheek lightly. Kurt laughs and cuddles into his boyfriend's shoulder.
Sam blows bubbles into his soda and tries not to gag. He had seen sickening sweet couples before-hell he had been half of one until last February-but these two? They're were constantly acting like that around each other. The only other couple he had seen come as close was Tina and Mike with their 'Asian kisses', but for the most part even they weren't that bad.
They were at a planning dinner for Nationals. Kurt had managed to convince Mr. Schuester to let Blaine come with them because “He's transferring next year, so he might as well get used to be around everyone.”
Also, who even brings up a dead pet while sweet talking their boyfriend?
At least, Kurt was happy. But Sam had been 'happy' when he was Quinn, and look where that ended? Besides, beneath Kurt's happiness there lurked something unpleasant. Kurt never crack jokes or told people off or made sarcastic comments around Blaine. He didn't have the same cool and composed “I know I'm better than all of you” demeanor. He just looked at Blaine all the time an adoring expression on his face. He always ordered the same food as Blaine, always tried to take a bite at the same time or drink a sip of his drink. Everything about it, reminds Sam of himself last fall.
“So adorable.” Blaine coos. He was always calling Kurt adorable. “Isn't he adorable?”
That last question was aimed at Sam. He lifted his mouth from the straw and looked at Kurt.
“No.”
He could have thought of quite a few words that could describe Kurt, some of which came from feelings that confused, and that he only thought about late at night when he couldn't sleep, and others that confused him less. Adorable was not one of those words. Adorable was for puppies or his little sisters.
Unfortunately, the little exchange between Blaine and him had taken place during a lull in the rest of the conversations his team mates were having around him. Most of his team mates were looking at him with various degrees of suprise or horror (he thought he saw Mercedes grin for a second though. She did seem annoyed whenever Kurt invited Blaine to these events). Santana simply raised an eyebrow. Kurt and Blaine had moved apart to look at him.
“Oh what I mean to say is Kurt isn't so much adorable as he is terrifying. Dude will kill you if you use the wrong version of 'there' in a sentence.”
“Sorry, I'm trying to improve your grammar and your life.” Kurt says with mock offense. Everybody laughs and things go back to the way they were. Kurt puts his hand over Blaine's on top of the table and snuggles into his shoulder.
The bubbles in Sam's glass grow bigger.
05/10/11
Sometimes they talk. It was good to have a friend again, after what happened between him and Finn in the winter. In the hallways before class, while waiting for glee club to begin, during a rare break from studying. It was usually about classes or whatever was going on in the Fuinn/Finchel triangle that week, or something else. From time to time Sam will end up showing Kurt one of his impressions. Kurt unlike Santana or Quinn, never looked at him like he was an alien, just slightly amused. Sometimes he even laughed. Once, Kurt talked about his mother and her death. He remembers feeling stupid because he couldn't think of anything to say afterwards, so instead he just held Kurt's hand.
But today it was about Blaine. Or more specifically about how he and Kurt got together.
“And then he said that I moved him, and he kissed me.” Kurt's eyes shone with a dreamy light, as he kicked his feet up.
Lori Menari.
“So is that it?” Sam asks. Kurt seems finished with the story. But that couldn't be the end, right? Kurt didn't decide to date him after just that, right?
“What else is there? Now, let's get back to reviewing Animal Farm.” Kurt picks up the book.
“Dude realized he was in love just because of a song, when you were singing together for months? Seems odd.”
“Love is different for everyone. Blaine was just a bit slower than me.”
“You just told me he said you had no sex appeal the week before, and then there was that thing with kissing Rachel.”
“It doesn't matter to me! He loves me now. It doesn't matter if he kissed Rachel, or said I wasn't sexy, or said I was like Kar-” Kurt stops in mid sentence.
“He said you were like who?”
“No one. I'd like you to leave now.”
“Really because it sounded like you were going to say 'Karofsky'?”
“I said I'd like you to leave now.” Kurt's lips were now pressed into a thin line.
Sam shakes his head and grabs his bookbag, stomping out of the room. He apologizes quickly to Mr Hummel and Ms. Hudson for the noise (Kurt's dad looks at him stone-faced, and Sam guesses he might have heard them talking about 'Karofsky' and Blaine in the same sentence). It's only when he gets outside that he realizes that he probably lost his only friend at McKinley. He doesn't know why it annoys him so much to see Kurt not value himself as much as he should, aside from his own experiences. Maybe, that was the only reason he needed.
He takes out his phone and starts to text a long message. He apologizes for being rude about something that obviously meant a lot to Kurt, he writes that he's sure Blaine does love Kurt as much as Kurt loves him (or thinks that he loves him anyway), and that he forget the last thing Kurt was going to say (if only because he hates thinking that Kurt was with a guy who compared him to the person who made Kurt's life hell).
Half an hour later Kurt sends back a message. “Meet me in the library tomorrow and we'll finish up.”
He wonders if Kurt will ever smile at his impressions again.
05/17/11
When, he sees Kurt in the library without his laptop on ( to download music, or obsessively check that weird site tumblr), he knows something is wrong.
“Did something happen?”
“Sam,” Kurt seems surprised. Not that Sam can blame him. They hadn't really talked since the night the week before. Whenever, they had tutoring sessions, Kurt ignored all his attempts to make small talk. During glee club meetings he was always sure to sit as far away as possible from Sam. Everyone assumed he said something to offend Kurt. He let them think that, it wasn't that far from the truth anyways. “It's nothing really.”
Sam doesn't leave though, optioning to sit in front of Kurt and stares.
Kurt doesn't hold out long, before explaining. “I had my first fight with Blaine just now on the phone.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Sam asks, not really expecting an answer. When Kurt doesn't say anything, he gets up and starts to go.
“He didn't like that I wouldn't answer texts from him when I was at Breadstix with Puck.”
“You were at Breadstix with Puck?” While, the two had become closer when Puck helped get Karofsky to transfer and then again when they found out Jacob had been the one who uploaded Trouty Mouth to the school website and 'dealt' with the situation, it was still odd to think about Puck and Kurt hanging out one on one.
“He needed advice about...” Kurt pauses and apparently thinks better about what he was going to say. “About something.”
“If it's about Quinn don't worry, I'm over it.”
And he was. It still hurt that she had cheated on him, but he understand why she did it better now (she wasn't much different from him), and it wasn't like they were that in love anyways. He doubts that she would do the same thing she did to Finn and him, to Puck somehow too.
“Well, anyway, Blaine asking me why I didn't text him back, and when I told him I was helping a friend, he accused me having an affair with Puck.”
“What?”
“My exact reaction. After a very long conversation, I ended up calling him possessive and uptight, and then I hung up on him.”
“Well, tha-”
“And now I feel bad about it. I was possessive before we got together. I had no right to get mad at him for worrying.”
You kinda of do.
“Don't worry,” is what Sam actually says, leaning in to rub Kurt's back. “I'm sure it will all work out. I mean Quinn thought I was having an affair with Beiste and that worked out.”
Yeah, go ahead and compare his relationship to your relationship that ended. In cheating. That will make him feel better.
Kurt just laughs and smiles kinda of sadly, like he has a habit of doing.
“Hey, Kurt tell your boyfriend to back off!” Puck stomps over them. “He's left me a million messages.”
“I'm sorry. I'm currently not talking to him.”
“Really? Cool. Who need 'em after all? You two want to hang out with the Pucksaurus tonight instead.”
“I'm up for it. Sam?” Kurt stands up. The bell had rung.
“Sure.” He grins following the other two out of the library to the next class.
When, Blaine shows up that afternoon in the choir room with a banquet of roses and luke warm apology, that plan is automatically out the window. Sam doesn't let the mask split for long-a polite smile is on his face again, within seconds of seeing Kurt squeal, and throw his arms around Blaine. Puck still glares, but then again no one would question that.
05/24/11
Sometimes, when he's looking at the glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling, Sam wonders if there was an elseworld somewhere out there, where the duet between Kurt and him hadn't been canceled. A universe where they became friends. A universe where Sam hadn't started dating Quinn . A universe where Sam had been able to stop the bullying before it escalate to the level it had. A universe where Kurt never met Blaine. He wonders what it would be like.
Yeah, right, and I'm Superman on Earth-245. He looks behind him, at Kurt sitting on his bed texting. At the look on his face Sam could guess who he was texting.
“Does he still text you the word 'courage' when you're at school?” Sam asks.
Kurt looks up and glares at him. “You're suppose to be practicing Geometry questions for exams, not looking at me.” Sam rolls his eyes, but goes back to his work without comment. “And not that it's any of your business, but yes he still does. He's so thoughtful.”
It takes more than just writing a word to have courage.
“What?”
“Nothing. I was just reading a question out loud.”
As Sam answers question 32 b (What is the area of the following square, if the length of BD is 2 root 2?), he thinks that maybe Earth-245's Sam isn't doing his homework and Earth-245's Kurt isn't being texted by another boy. Maybe that universe's Sam is being pressed into his mattress, Kurt on top of him, hands running through each other's hair....
The tip of Sam's pencil breaks off. He must have pushed it too hard against the paper. He takes the sharpener out of his pencil box and looks back at Kurt again. He was still reading his messages, laughing softly to himself.
Sam has no right to lecture anyone about courage.
05/31/11
Sam finishes singing “Just to See You Smile” and looks up smiling as the gleeclub claps. Finals were over (he managed to get a B+ average), and in between practicing Nationals numbers, Mr. Schuester had given them a new assignment: 'sing a song as a message to someone '. A typically boring and unproductive assignment, in Kurt's words.
The girls were whispering about it having something to do with Quinn while Sam took his seat. He just shakes his head. It wasn't about Quinn for sure. Well, maybe it was just a little. But...
“So, who's the lucky girl?” Kurt asks with that little half smile.
Sam gulps. “Nobody you know.”
06/07/11
“Blaine and I broke up.”
“What?” Sam leans over. They were sitting beside each other in the sticky airport chairs, waiting for to fly to New York for Nationals. Everyone else was either buying coffee, in the bathroom or sitting in the corner talking excitedly about what they wanted to do in New York. “Why?”
“A lot of reasons.” Kurt sighs picking at the front of his shirt. “We weren't as happy as everyone thought. We fought all the time, and when we weren't fighting it wasn't really anything mind blowing. Just pleasant really.”
“Oh.”
“But I was okay with it. It was just enough having a boyfriend. But than last week I was watching Brittany and Santana together, and seeing how easy they were around each other, made me realize that I'd never have that with Blaine.” He looks at Sam now his eyes steady. “Whenever I was around him I was worried about living up to his expectations of who I thought he wanted to be. It's nobody’s fault really, but it's not something I want anymore. I want what Brittany and Santana have, I want what Carole and my dad have.”
“How did he take it?” Sam asks, a few moments after Kurt finished speaking, wondering if Blaine had fought to keep his relationship with Kurt or not.
“He tried to convince me that we could work it out, but he eventually agreed that we are better of as friends.”
“Are you okay, dude?”
“Mostly. I'm a little annoyed that he gave up so quickly, but then again Blaine has history of easily getting over heartbreak. Maybe I do too.”
Sam feels the urge to say everything in that moment., to blurt it all out and for all the secrets to be uncovered. But then Kurt goes on to say:
“I'm giving up on love for now. No more trying to be with someone for the sake of not being alone. When it happens I want both the other person and me to be completely ready, and not to rush into it this time.”
Sam closes his mouth. “I'm sure someone will see how awesome and kind you are one day. I'm going to go get some water. Be back in a minute.” He clapped Kurt on the back and started to walk off, towards the vending machines.
It wouldn't be fair right now for either of them. He was still so confused and Kurt did need time. Maybe tomorrow he'd tell Kurt one of the secrets he had been carrying, and then maybe a little while afterwards he'd tell the other secrets. If it felt right that is.
Kurt looks after him, almost like he realized something. Then, he shakes it off and waves over Mercedes and Rachel who were coming back from their coffee run.