valentine's day
i had class at 8am this morning, when i got in the elevator a boy said good morning then he said "oh yeah! happy valentines day!" i told him thank you and that he was the first person to say that to me (obviously, it was only 7:45am) and he told me that he for sure wouldn't be the last. that just got me thinking about how big of a difference of male attention i get now then the amount of male attention i got before i lost twenty pounds since i moved back to eastern in the fall.
i hate when people tell me it doesn't make a difference, it obviously does. everyone thinks i'm prettier now.. even my grandmother said i was always pretty before but i've never been gorgeous like i am now. it's not even her, in high school i never really had boyfriends or guys really liking me except once in a blue moon. it was always my friends who dated. but now since i lost weight (and i didn't really think i weighed that much before) i've been getting attention that i've never gotten before. and i know it's not just being in college.. i went to the same school last year and guys didn't look at me so much. but now, this year, i feel like i had plastic surgery or something.. i mean.. do i really look that much better? it's a lot of pressure to maintain this weight.. i can't imagine going back to the way i was before.. and it's honestly because of the way i'm treated now.. by everyone. i guess in some way it's kind of a shame. or not. i don't know.
i hate when people tell me it doesn't make a difference, it obviously does. everyone thinks i'm prettier now.. even my grandmother said i was always pretty before but i've never been gorgeous like i am now. it's not even her, in high school i never really had boyfriends or guys really liking me except once in a blue moon. it was always my friends who dated. but now since i lost weight (and i didn't really think i weighed that much before) i've been getting attention that i've never gotten before. and i know it's not just being in college.. i went to the same school last year and guys didn't look at me so much. but now, this year, i feel like i had plastic surgery or something.. i mean.. do i really look that much better? it's a lot of pressure to maintain this weight.. i can't imagine going back to the way i was before.. and it's honestly because of the way i'm treated now.. by everyone. i guess in some way it's kind of a shame. or not. i don't know.