This little gem is brought to you courtesy of my brother (deer_dance), who overheard it in one of those smoking pocket garden places - whatever they're called - near a pond.

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[It is raining. A frog leaps out of the pond and across the field.]

Maarte Freshman: Ewwwwwwww! A fralaka!

[pause]

Maarte Freshman: Oh. My. God. I JUST MIXED FROG AND

So I went off and posted a comment on the BBC news website on the shit that went down this morning, and I got an email asking if they could publish it and maybe call me up to talk to me (yay ( Read more... )

Motherfucker. I sort-of-accidentally ripped off half my right eyebrow from stress. Any suggestions on how to fix it? Or at least make it presentable for the next three weeks until it grows back?

[edit 1] I would like to clarify that I ripped off my eyebrow with my bare hands, not tweezers.

[edit 2] In other news, Man Cuts Off Penis In Restaurant.