I'm here losing sleep >random random emotions drugs drama random high school
I guess you could say, if I had to chose a color for my ora, it'd be gray. My body has been invaded . I'm not good at this. But right now I'm at the point where I've got to just be exposed. I hate feeling like this and it won't go away. 2 projects due by monday, no time no time no time. feel disgusting, too much food uugh.nasty.ew. need to run a bajillion miles. make it all go away. I dont know. college? I dont know. which? I dont know. track? my bro got hit by a car- hit &run. no broken bones. is this me maturing or me distancing myself? Maybe I've learned that I don't need you anymore. Maybe you still thrive on attention. Maybe our relationship was only based on desperation. Shady feelings, scared, nervous. dont adjust well to change. You didn't seem as into this/me. Need reassurance. Need you to prove.us.to.me.
Sometimes I hate you when you're with him. I'm not "cool" enough. You're trying to impress him, i lose respect for you. I'm not going to deal with your crap, I've got enough of it here at home. Sometimes I wonder why I deal with the people I do. You're mean, you disregard me, you ignore me, you don't call- I can't help but think that I wouldn't mind if i never saw you again. I've realized how fake some friendships are along with people in general. And at first i felt betrayed but why should I since you don't mind using me and others for your disposal.
Sometimes life is just so hard. I'm due for a release from this manotnous routine. I'm due for a release from myself. It's time to get out of the dessert and into the sun, even if it's alone.
I was lost then I found you,
But I’m breaking down now that…
Your sore thumb,
Your best defense is miles from home.
Oh, and it reads like a letter with the words
All broken.
Erased them with a razorblade,
Cause you’re gone.
wish me sleep. wish me peace. wish me to be with you. wish us to survive. wish for more out of life. wish us time. wish us everlasting...