*sigh*
So, I participated in this Women Who Jam thing yesterday night, which was basically a bunch of local female artists coming together to showcase some talent. I thought it would be my chance to shine, but actually, it was more like I was the big joke.
Red flag #1: When I arrived, it seemed as if everybody already knew everybody, and I was like, "O..k... Is this a setup?" Red flag #2: I was slotted to go first. I didn't realize that this was bad until I got a listen to the other women who came after me. Semi-celebrity singers or at least pretty well known around town. I guess it was the "Get the unknown out of the way first, then save the REAL stars for later!" Red flag #3: While the organizer of the event took pictures of everyone else as they performed, she did not take any pictures of me . Red flag #4: During my second set, I forgot the lyrics to the song I was singing and had to start over. Highly embarrassing. Red flag #5:. The performers were to do four songs - two for each set, however, I was told that I could only do one song due to "time constraints" after my debacle. Two other people were also asked to do one song only. I knew something was sort of afoul when, after the regular second set was over, two of the other performers were asked to do another song. Actually, when one person finished her song, the organizer said, "Do another one!" What the fuck? Ok, if mine and two other people's sets were cut short due to time, why would you allow two other performers to do another song later? How is that fair? I wasn't booed off, but I felt like Sandman was coming at me with a cane and not only that, I felt like I was in high school all over again....the oddball out.
I feel like I want to stop singing for a long time. I felt so hurt, embarrassed and foolish. Like, "Why am I here?"
Well, off to rethink my purpose on the planet. I am clearly not an entertainer.
Red flag #1: When I arrived, it seemed as if everybody already knew everybody, and I was like, "O..k... Is this a setup?" Red flag #2: I was slotted to go first. I didn't realize that this was bad until I got a listen to the other women who came after me. Semi-celebrity singers or at least pretty well known around town. I guess it was the "Get the unknown out of the way first, then save the REAL stars for later!" Red flag #3: While the organizer of the event took pictures of everyone else as they performed, she did not take any pictures of me . Red flag #4: During my second set, I forgot the lyrics to the song I was singing and had to start over. Highly embarrassing. Red flag #5:. The performers were to do four songs - two for each set, however, I was told that I could only do one song due to "time constraints" after my debacle. Two other people were also asked to do one song only. I knew something was sort of afoul when, after the regular second set was over, two of the other performers were asked to do another song. Actually, when one person finished her song, the organizer said, "Do another one!" What the fuck? Ok, if mine and two other people's sets were cut short due to time, why would you allow two other performers to do another song later? How is that fair? I wasn't booed off, but I felt like Sandman was coming at me with a cane and not only that, I felt like I was in high school all over again....the oddball out.
I feel like I want to stop singing for a long time. I felt so hurt, embarrassed and foolish. Like, "Why am I here?"
Well, off to rethink my purpose on the planet. I am clearly not an entertainer.