And Both Were Young, review, and thoughts on bullies
While I rack my brain trying to think of iconic female characters from the 2000s-2010s for
ruuger , have a book review.
The audio version of a book is a different experience than reading a book. For one thing it's hard to turn back the page and re-read something you missed (although the 15 sec retreat/advance buttons are nice in Overdrive).
Recently I finished listening to Madeleine L'Engle's And Both Were Young, a coming-of-age novel set in post-WWII Europe at a girl's school. Phillipa Hunter is the daughter of Philip Hunter, an artist who is traveling to illustrate a book about the lost children of the war. Her mother was killed in a car accident that left her with a limp and a badly injured knee. A friend of her father's, a woman who is seemingly interested in her father, recommends a boarding school for Phillipa. The day before they leave for the school, Phillipa meets a boy named Paul Laurent, on the shore of Lake Geneva outside the Chateu of Chillon.
Phillipa is initially miserable in school, but after she is given a lecture by her favorite teacher, Mademoiselle Percival about trying harder to fit in, she finds a talent for caricature and skiing help her learn to like school. Her friendship with Paul Laurent also deepens when he turns up to be staying near the school with his father, who is writing a book, while his mother, a singer, is on tour.
I liked the book. I liked Phillipa, very much. I've always liked school stories. There were nice subplots about the central importance of memory, about the difficulty of being German after WWII, about scams involving adopted refugee children. But the bulk of the story is about Phillipa. L'Engle does her usual marvelous job with her unappreciated, unhappy adolescent girl character. Paul is a little less realistic to my mind but then we don't see as much of him.
So Phillipa was bullied in school. Or was she? I'm beginning to think that my ideas about bullying are all screwed up.She was given an unflattering nickname that she hated. She was left out of everything, teased, and ridiculed. Her favorite teacher tells her that her own attitude is bringing on the teasing, that you have to expect the other girls to react that way, that she sulks when teased even when she knows the other girls are only joking. This little diatribe brought me up short. The idea that the girls are naturally going to tease, and that Phillipa's reactions are what is driving their actions, was fairly repugnant to me. I've been dealing with bullying of my younger son, a natural target in many ways. I've been working on keeping myself as his confidant, providing a safe space for him to unload; so he has someone to talk to, and also so I know what's going on. But part of me thinks he has to learn to deal with these guys. I was thinking maybe Madame Percival was right. Maybe kids are just naturally cruel and attracted to the weak and sensitive among us. Maybe what I should be cultivating in #2 is a thick skin and ability to laugh back at them.
I wish other people wanted to cultivate kindness and acceptance of others' foibles in their kids.
The second half of the book didn't ring as true to me, although it was a nice happy ending with most of the problems worked out, but not all of them. Sigh. Wish I hadn't gotten thrown off by that part of the storyline.
This entry was originally posted at http://vjs2259.dreamwidth.org/345134.html. Please comment there using OpenID.
ruuger , have a book review.
The audio version of a book is a different experience than reading a book. For one thing it's hard to turn back the page and re-read something you missed (although the 15 sec retreat/advance buttons are nice in Overdrive).
Recently I finished listening to Madeleine L'Engle's And Both Were Young, a coming-of-age novel set in post-WWII Europe at a girl's school. Phillipa Hunter is the daughter of Philip Hunter, an artist who is traveling to illustrate a book about the lost children of the war. Her mother was killed in a car accident that left her with a limp and a badly injured knee. A friend of her father's, a woman who is seemingly interested in her father, recommends a boarding school for Phillipa. The day before they leave for the school, Phillipa meets a boy named Paul Laurent, on the shore of Lake Geneva outside the Chateu of Chillon.
Phillipa is initially miserable in school, but after she is given a lecture by her favorite teacher, Mademoiselle Percival about trying harder to fit in, she finds a talent for caricature and skiing help her learn to like school. Her friendship with Paul Laurent also deepens when he turns up to be staying near the school with his father, who is writing a book, while his mother, a singer, is on tour.
I liked the book. I liked Phillipa, very much. I've always liked school stories. There were nice subplots about the central importance of memory, about the difficulty of being German after WWII, about scams involving adopted refugee children. But the bulk of the story is about Phillipa. L'Engle does her usual marvelous job with her unappreciated, unhappy adolescent girl character. Paul is a little less realistic to my mind but then we don't see as much of him.
So Phillipa was bullied in school. Or was she? I'm beginning to think that my ideas about bullying are all screwed up.She was given an unflattering nickname that she hated. She was left out of everything, teased, and ridiculed. Her favorite teacher tells her that her own attitude is bringing on the teasing, that you have to expect the other girls to react that way, that she sulks when teased even when she knows the other girls are only joking. This little diatribe brought me up short. The idea that the girls are naturally going to tease, and that Phillipa's reactions are what is driving their actions, was fairly repugnant to me. I've been dealing with bullying of my younger son, a natural target in many ways. I've been working on keeping myself as his confidant, providing a safe space for him to unload; so he has someone to talk to, and also so I know what's going on. But part of me thinks he has to learn to deal with these guys. I was thinking maybe Madame Percival was right. Maybe kids are just naturally cruel and attracted to the weak and sensitive among us. Maybe what I should be cultivating in #2 is a thick skin and ability to laugh back at them.
I wish other people wanted to cultivate kindness and acceptance of others' foibles in their kids.
The second half of the book didn't ring as true to me, although it was a nice happy ending with most of the problems worked out, but not all of them. Sigh. Wish I hadn't gotten thrown off by that part of the storyline.
This entry was originally posted at http://vjs2259.dreamwidth.org/345134.html. Please comment there using OpenID.