were you poor? did you eat chicken pot pie?
i've been pretty spoiled the past month. although i'm not getting paid, working at eye candy has made me really take a look at just how fucked up working for a big company such as highmark is. i hate that the person who is making decisions that affect my paycheck and whether or not i get it is someone who doesn't make it a secret that she couldn't give two shits about me. i hate how impersonal and sterile all of my relationships with people in that company are. with the exception of the other reps that i'm friends with. but that's mostly because they share in the same misery that is our job. not to say that i don't appreciate these people as friends, that's just not what i'm talking about.
i was supposed to go back to work today. but i just couldn't. my dr had to refax some shit to that imc and she decided to extend my leave for another month. to all of those who texted me about where i was and who are concerned. i'm sorry i didn't respond, but honestly i could barely talk about it with jason and brian and i yap at those guys about my problems everyday. i was just so frustrated and at my end with all of this crap. without going into too much detail, lest i slit my own wrists, i haven't gotten paid in about a month because of some mixup with clinical faxes from my dr, and the asshole at highmark who's handling my occupational health shit doesn't really give a shit if i live or die didn't tell me about it until last week. real fucking convenient. i've been keeping my chin up and just keeping in mind that these problems aren't in my control and to just enjoy each day but that was just downright impossible today.
my day is getting better though. i've got my brother and mom close by and i really appreciate them a lot recently. i dyed my moms hair and she gave me a mom hug and it made me feel a lot better. i should be getting my paycheck before the week is over and all in all things could be a lot worse. i've just gotta keep my head up and remember that if i'm not aware things will just pass me by. and just being alive is pretty amazing in itself. i'm gonna go eat some cantalope.
i was supposed to go back to work today. but i just couldn't. my dr had to refax some shit to that imc and she decided to extend my leave for another month. to all of those who texted me about where i was and who are concerned. i'm sorry i didn't respond, but honestly i could barely talk about it with jason and brian and i yap at those guys about my problems everyday. i was just so frustrated and at my end with all of this crap. without going into too much detail, lest i slit my own wrists, i haven't gotten paid in about a month because of some mixup with clinical faxes from my dr, and the asshole at highmark who's handling my occupational health shit doesn't really give a shit if i live or die didn't tell me about it until last week. real fucking convenient. i've been keeping my chin up and just keeping in mind that these problems aren't in my control and to just enjoy each day but that was just downright impossible today.
my day is getting better though. i've got my brother and mom close by and i really appreciate them a lot recently. i dyed my moms hair and she gave me a mom hug and it made me feel a lot better. i should be getting my paycheck before the week is over and all in all things could be a lot worse. i've just gotta keep my head up and remember that if i'm not aware things will just pass me by. and just being alive is pretty amazing in itself. i'm gonna go eat some cantalope.