Scene: 11: 20 PM in The Apartment. The phone rings.

Me: If you were a left tennis shoe, where would you hide?

Disembodied Voice of Mater: Under the bed; now tell me what 'filking' is.

On Padme's frankly bullshit death in Star Wars: Episode III, which the minions just watched:

Little Sister: Well, if Boyfriend turned evil and went to the Dark Side, I would be really upset and need some really good therapy, but it wouldn't occur to me to just die.

Boyfriend: I have a secret.

I went out on the town with Mater today. We went out to lunch and did some fun errands, and then I used a word that one does not usually utter in front of one's mother.

"What the %#*#& are they doing here?"

They were a group of three or four people standing on the corner of a good sized intersection a few blocks from my house, holding aloft ( Read more... )

It never goes smooth. How come it never goes smooth?!

--Mal Reynolds, Safe

Me: Are the words "I have a cunning plan" marching with ill-deserved confidence in the direction of this conversation?
Her: YES!

Red Headed Gent: What's up? Are you doing anything? I'm hanging out. Maybe going to do something tonight. So if you're free...Will you be free this evening...?

Me: I HAVE PAPERS DUE DAMNIT GOOD BYE.

I went to a nice Rice U launch party for an academic work on posthumanism with Mater and somehow got her drunk on pomegranate martinis.

This is why we can't have nice things.

[Forwarded from Pater, regarding Texas school board, I think]

Some Dude: Your a piece of shit.
Pater: Your grammar is weak.
Some Dude: Grammar is a big word.
Pater: *Delete*

Me: Okay, I think before anything else...before jumping to the emotional response...I think we should take a step back and consider the fascinating scientific ramifications of this mug which has been in my room for a really long time.
Mater: I think it's the simplicity of mold.
Me: It floats.

The Master is blond, the new "Sherlock Holmes" is delicious, I got "Wolf Hall" and tickets to "Wait Wait Don't Tell Me" for Christmas, the Redheaded Gent is back in town, the cousins and second cousins are out of town, and we were out of champagne by midnight, so we rang in the new year with tequila shots.

Happy Holidays!