Dropped a point but its probably good in the long run.........

[viscera_despere]

I feel like the divorce made me lose a humanity or at least a morality. Everything feels harsher and crueler and sharper. I accept that people are apathetic and focus more on working around it than trying to inject some empathy into them. I suppose in some ways its a good thing. I feel like my values have shifted dramatically though not necessarily

Comments

friends

[viscera_despere]

Actually, I had already un-friended you before I had made this post. I had half-thought about locking it as friends but had to rush off to do things at the end of it. This particular post wasn't super sensitive as far as people having access to it, so it doesn't really matter.

I did want us to be friends but I don't think friends mean the same thing to me as they do to other people. A friend should be someone I can trust with anything, who would check on me if I seemed not okay (not send people over to ask if I was mad like we were in Junior High), and not try to deceive me. That said, you are not one of the people I was very angry at at the last game you went to. People had lied to me out-of-charcater to make me believe that if Myria didn't take the throne, game stability and Loki's take-over would suffer. I got manuvered out of game into finding a way to manipulate Myria into doing something not within her usual actions and personality, so that things could continue more easily. This coincided with the job I had found flaking out on me, Todd threatening to find a way to take Isaiah away from me, and the doctors thinking that Andy's headaches could be a symptom of an aneurysm, where his chances of survival were possibly lower than 50% (this did not turn out to be the case, but it was scary none-the-less). A friend, by my definition, would not have been so caught up in gaining one last triumph before retiring a character and leaving the game that a friendship was ignored. That said, I am not angry with you. I don't consider you one of my I could tell anything to and rely on friends, but beyond that I don't have any inherent problem with you as a person.

I hope that clarifies things a bit.

Re: friends

[musae]

I'm sorry that you felt as if people were manipulating you, and I'm sorry that you were hurt as a result of the actions (or non-action, as the case may be) of people that evening.

Your definition of friend is not inaccurate I would say, and I'm sorry that I failed to provide the support needed at that time. Saying that I had some things of my own going on at that time that I chose not to address with many people at all will not make it better, and is not an excuse, only perhaps some insight into my behavior that evening.

I left SCM behind, and I would like to leave any negativity (well, that I carry at least- I can't control anyone else's behavior) behind as well. I hope that things continue to progress positively for you, and that your healing process ultimately takes you to where and who you want to be.

I have unfriended you as it seems appropriate, but certainly without malice.