fake it til you make it
it hurts so much when all you want and try to do is love yourself and you cant. I can't even picture when that or if that will ever happen. My heart is plagued by this dull aching that nothing can make go away. Nothing or noone, not even myself, can do anything. I dont know if I can live the rest of my life like this. I dont know if I can live the rest of my life like this, with the ache in my heart, the nausia in my stomache, and the hate I feel towards myself. I've been trying for years and I've tried everything. I've exhausted what little strength I had within myself. Its not fair. If you added up all the nights I've cried myself to sleep I could have graduated college in that time I'm not asking for the world. This shouldn't be this hard. I shouldn't have to fight to wake up or fight to survive the day.