Black Rose in A Vase of Scarlet

Nov 05, 2004 23:40




Painted Wings in a bottle of Acidic Tears..Words from my Rotting Heart

its so easy to cry ...even when ure so dry and empty inside. where does all this water come from...why is it so easy for sister sorrow to enter your soul? So i built a ladder with the thorns of experience and collected the coagulated blood from my open wounds.Climbing the stairway to the sky where mother moon awaited me patiently...i caressed her pale and withering face and kissed her eyes that bled for all the pain her scarlings endured...mother moon how does sorrow feed and why is she so strong? where does she recieve this power she wields and to whom does it belong? Your insecurities are icicles that chill her spine.Your thorny roses they form a forest of grape vines...so you sleep as she reaps the harvest..a bucket of barren is a feast of fear.Devovour the depression and summon the reaper.they dine on death they dine on disgrace. they dine on the scarlet waterfalls that drench your face...needles of negativity they impale your heart.drive right through tear me apart. i sink deeper into the scarlet..Sirens lay dead in the scarlet seas and fishes they choke on blood.if there was a flood in the scarlet sea the waters would cake like mud...corals washed ashore no longer pretty..a starfish shriveled no longer celebrity...how easy it is for beauty to fade away and yet ugliness haunts like old memories..i buried myself in the sand and felt the tide mutilate me...desperate to cleanse myself of the sin..Death and depression and all thats in between...why does it all have to hurt so badly? so bitter but yes i try to be sweet..the ants they nibble on my feet each bit..rip away the chcolate coating..poisoned by what lies beneath ..gloating on the gloom..floating above the room...just a corpse..the breathing dead the living dead..alive but decomposed...eyes wide but comatosed...apocalypse now as mother moon departs..fade to oblivion..u have to burn..to bleed..to feed..to need..father if i cry a river will they send me a boat to bring me to the palace under the sea?with each breathe that fades will the air carry my soul to a luna eden...?wishing sorrow would depart from me ..:'(maybe somewhere down the road you got sick of me...

About today..(T_T)
today i decided to make something for her.i know she writes alot sometimes songs for her band so i decided to decorate this small notebook for her.i printed out these icons of joey and pasted them unto the book then wrapped it in plastic...issey says its really sweet but she might interpret it as psycho or obsessive..sigh~ and here i thought i was being sweet.so maybe i wont give it to her after all..its real amateur looking by the way..just thought it would be nice u know *wipes tears* since she likes joey so much..i feel so cold tonight and alone..i have a lump in my throat thinkin if maybe she blocked me or doesnt wanna come online to deal with my bullshiet...talked to rufio today this really nice stud friend.asked for her opinion on this whole thing and she said to try and enjoy our time with each other. (What time? :'()
and not too get too involved and that way it wont hurt.but how do u do that? i realise thats the same advice i gave viv once...and i know how hard it is cos i know i love her so much and to me our making love just consumated that.it was so special to me and i wanna tell her this: do u know what i love about my life? Answer: the moments when you have your eyes closed and youre lying on my lap.i live my days for that...but i dont wanna come off as being too psychotic once again..it hurts..i seem to always jinx things when i get so happy n lavish in a moment of bliss..now i know why my mother used to say dont be too happy cos u will surely cry later.i wonder if after i gave her my body she got tired of me.weather i wasnt good the second time (T_T) because after the second time unlike the first time there were no messages going : baby i cant stop thinking bout u it all seemed like a dream..Maybe the delerium veil was lifted ...i long to hear those words.She never even messages me back anymore when i say i miss her..im so scared and so incredibly sad...i felt sad when i was tellin rufio about baby talkin to rei and she said her gurl does that too and its so sweet and it makes her melt..i wonder if i make rei melt too or simply annoy her..maybe shes decided to abandon me..it hurts like knives.i feel like a dumb ass now..that i spent most of the day makin her stuff n now shes abandoned me.i wont message her to ask her if shes coming online cos i know i wont get a reply.i wonder if she thinks about me because theres not one minute that i dont think about her..Where are you baby?please i need u please please..(T_T)

World of Glass by Tristania



All you ever wanted
All that you desire
Walk the line with me
I'll take you higher
I feel your body shake
Put me on fire
All you ever wanted...
All that you desire...
Who's the prey
What's the play
God created
Stay with me
We are the ones God hated

I'm a falling stone in a world of glass
I'm a ticking bomb with a smiling mask

Can you ever let go?

I'll play you like a violin
...stay...
You will be queen
I will be king
I'll chase your scary monsters
On the run
With me you are safe
I'm in control

I'll fulfil all your dreams
Every fantasy
I will be
What you need
Satisfaction guaranteed

Can you see them?
Can you hear them?
Can you feel them?
Do you fear them?
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