fic-DBSK-Fifteen

[virdant]

Title: Fifteen
Author: virdant
Length: 4,048 words; one-shot
Rating: PG / PG-13
Genre: AU, Humor, Supernatural(ish) maybe
Pairing: OT5-ish
Summary: I really had no idea what was going on. First a weirdo says strange things to me when I go buy pudding for my sister, next I get a stalker who tries to mind my business, and then a stranger ends up giving me

Comments

[sy_ya]

interesting piece. and well it can only be changmin right?
some parts were a bit weird, but maybe it's just because i haven't slept yet. lol. i'll read it again and try to say something coherent & helpful. i hope.

[virdant]

Thank you for reading ^^

Yup, the narrator is Changmin. It's really hard for me to write Changmin in a first person narration, which is why I did this--desperate attempt to learn how to write him. DXD

Lol, please tell me whatever parts you find weird; I don't dare show this to the person who usually looks over my fics for me because she detests the Haruhi Suzumiya series and she made me promise never to show her anything related to that series. So anything you say will be really appreciated! ^^ I also had no idea what I was writing at some points of this fic lol ^^;;

[sy_ya]

i've slept already, but i am not confident this would be helpful. lol. and i apologize for the stupid remarks & questions >_>;
and i'm not too familiar with the series where this was based on, but i checked out the link you gave in the a/n. sounds interesting ^^

i think what made the characters familiar even if you didn't name them (until the end anyway) were the descriptions. you took the distinguishing traits of each member - changmin's sarcasm (& his rumored religion & younger sister), yoochun's english (although i think he's rather generous with treating his friends with food lol. but yeah, he can be a cheapskate from what i remember of interviews), jaejoong's appearance, junsu's gags, & yunho's 'big movements.'

anyway, i enjoyed it, maybe not in the way it was meant to be enjoyed. though i really don't know how it should be. lol. but yeah, it was a good read even if my otp is non-existent & another pairing had their moment. lol.

talked of ghosts that whispered promises and fears into other’s ears.the 'other's' here seems

[virdant]

Ah, anything is helpful really. I mean, this was written really quickly and this style isn't my usual.
The series this is based on is really amazing. * fangirls * I can go on and on about it but suffice to say this fic is a pastiche of that series (specifically the first novel), and it was awkward to write this because well, I had it open in front of me and it's weird writing in a language different from the one you're reading XD.

Well, I tried to make it clear enough who was who as I was writing; I'm glad it worked out well enough; I don't have a good enough grasp on people's characterizations as I like to think lol.

Well, I'm not certain what the point of this was anyways. Mostly voice and style practice, and also just some fun Ghost Festival fic, but mostly trying out the narration style, so any enjoyment derived is good. :) And that moment has to do with another otp of mine from the series and really was simply because I did want to keep things in a falsely parallel manner, though it's exceedingly different as it isI will look

[kurogoma]

stranger no. 1 = yunho (too many clues all over the place about appearance and mannerisms, and that bit about tying back the hair and he would be so pretty....)
stranger no. 2 = yoochun (“Our vitality is like the gingerbread man’s.”)
stranger no. 3 = junsu (“Just. Don’t say anymore really bad puns. Please.”)
stranger no. 4 = jaejoong (Why did it have to be him who explained everything? He was such a spaz.)

did i get it right? this was a fun read, alittle surreal but it made my brain worked alittle trying to decipher what exactly it's all about, and who's who.

[virdant]

Thank you for reading ^^

Haha, yup, it's all correct. I'll take that as a good thing, because I was so worried that it wouldn't be clear. ^^;; And the fic is really rather odd because it ran away with me quite a bit as I was writing. But I'm glad that it was entertaining and all that XD.

[kurogoma]

oh no, tis i who have to thank you in return. just because of that wee bit of jaemin that if i blinked i would have missed the kiss it, but you are talking about a jaemin fangirl here, of course. :D ♥

[virdant]

^^;; there is actually a very obscure reason for that kiss it has to do with another otp of mine in another fandom so I won't mention it ^^;; but jaemin is adoarablely violent just like the otp that caused that kiss

[silhouettedwing]

I KNEW IT WAS CHANGMIN. It sounds so much like him. xD

I think it was rather interesting, especially how you tied everything up nicely at the end.

“It’s Ghost Month.”

What does that have to do with anything?

Oh.

Oh.

I can so totally see Changmin doing this.

Brilliant.

[virdant]

Thank you for reading ^^

I'm glad it was clear and it sounded like him! I kept worrying as I was writing that it wouldn't be clear enough and I kept accidentally channeling a character from a different show that is very similar to Changmin but is not quite the same person so I'm glad that it sounds like him! * sighs in relief *

I'm glad that everything did get tied up. I keep looking for trailing plot threads because I'm sure I missed something XD.

^^ I like that part; I feel like it's one of the few parts where I managed to grasp Changmin's voice. XD

^^ Thank you for your comment.

[quiet_heartache]

XD this was soooo random
but in a good way lol!
dbsk never existing, hmm, concerning!
but i like this. how theyre all strangers lols
i got the characters but i cant proove it now cos i read the comments XD

thankies

[virdant]

Thank you for reading ^^

Lol, well, I had no actual plot when I was writing this; it was really originally style practice, but as I kept writing I realized it was pretty decent and it did have a plot so I posted. * shrugs * Lol, randomnes in a good way is always good XD.

In my mind, this story actually takes place tens of hundreds of years from now, but that is mostly because I like canon consistency. Please ignore my stupidity.

[jt_fangirlism]

ROFL.
this was different, in a really good way..^^
yoochun's random ramblings about the gingerbread man and such had me laughing nonstop.. that is if i got it right, 1 is yunho, 2 is chun, 3 is su and 4 is jae?? well, no doubt changmin is the narrator since he's genius.. XDDD

really interesting!♥

[jt_fangirlism]

toink! turns out somebody already pointed out the characters.. silly!me..
still, this is good!^^

[virdant]

Thank you for reading ^^

Well, I'm glad it's good! I like trying out different styles and the like, which is why my writing tends to fluctuate XD. And you did get everybody right, though somebody already pointed them out (If you had fun working out who was who, then that's really what matters XD)

Thank you for saying so ^^