(no subject)
I have to say that I have been in an extremely good mood lately. It's a nice feeling, to have that when nothing extraordinary is going on. I've really been thinking a lot about how good I have it, and that I shouldn't waste my life. Which is not to say I have been wasting it, I've done what I needed to do to get through things. But I need to realize each minute, each blessing, 100% of the time. I feel badly for those people who take things for granted or are prone to jealousies that just needn't be. I refuse to let myself become like that.
I'm ready for Casey's DIVIDE cd to be out and in my hands. And I'm ready to see him perform again. You would never have guessed I wasn't a live performance/concert goer up until this past year. Every now and again I would go see someone- NIN, Tori, Stabbing Westward, Coldplay, others I can't recall. It was nice but I never really connected. Not even with Tori, who was my absolute favorite for a few years after Scotty's brainwashing finally took effect. Hah! Now...well...now it's different. It's all different. And I love it. I love reconnecting with myself and my emotions, I love meeting new people and friends, I love exchanging thoughts and smiles and dinners and whatever else with those I find amazing and worth my time. It is really the human element that fuels the passion. Yes...life, my life, really is great. I have had, or do have, almost everything I want.
This Wed. is the last day of my grief class. I am going to MISS IT. I have been giving a lot of thought to volunteering, either there at the hospice center or elsewhere. Perhaps something like the Make A Wish Foundation. The idea has been pulling on me rather strongly. I also want to check into area shelters to see about serving dinners on Thanksgiving or Christmas. I'm going to Michael's parents for Thanksgiving because my parents will be in Belize so I don't know if I could work something out then, but definitely Christmas I want to do *something*. Last year, when I was still living in Philly, I was checking into it for Thanksgiving, but I was so emotionally fucked that I couldn't follow through. This year, no excuses.
To jump ahead to NYE- I had a thought about NYC for a minute. I looked into hotels and the ones that are still available, well, I'm not paying that amount to stay there. That's alcohol and clothes money. So I'm back to my original thoughts. Although, after my birthday..haha..I might need more than a month to recouperate. Speaking of my birthday- I was looking into getting a limo for that Friday night when we go out and become lushes for 4 or so hours. Matty says most of the clubs are within walking distance, however I'm thinking I might want to really do it up. Things are a little tight financially through this week but after that I will be fine so...it's something to consider. (why is every word I write looking like it's spelled wrong?) I do know this, though, I have figured out that the more money I have and make, the more I spend. I need to get control of that because once school starts, that will be my priority. I surely can't be galavanting all over the country on whims, doing the 'accidental shopping' thing, and then wondering where the hell all my money went and having to look in couch cushions for book and class money. Hah! I've always said I'm bad with money, but good at spending it. Just talking about this makes me want to go shopping.
Which means...goodnight!
I'm ready for Casey's DIVIDE cd to be out and in my hands. And I'm ready to see him perform again. You would never have guessed I wasn't a live performance/concert goer up until this past year. Every now and again I would go see someone- NIN, Tori, Stabbing Westward, Coldplay, others I can't recall. It was nice but I never really connected. Not even with Tori, who was my absolute favorite for a few years after Scotty's brainwashing finally took effect. Hah! Now...well...now it's different. It's all different. And I love it. I love reconnecting with myself and my emotions, I love meeting new people and friends, I love exchanging thoughts and smiles and dinners and whatever else with those I find amazing and worth my time. It is really the human element that fuels the passion. Yes...life, my life, really is great. I have had, or do have, almost everything I want.
This Wed. is the last day of my grief class. I am going to MISS IT. I have been giving a lot of thought to volunteering, either there at the hospice center or elsewhere. Perhaps something like the Make A Wish Foundation. The idea has been pulling on me rather strongly. I also want to check into area shelters to see about serving dinners on Thanksgiving or Christmas. I'm going to Michael's parents for Thanksgiving because my parents will be in Belize so I don't know if I could work something out then, but definitely Christmas I want to do *something*. Last year, when I was still living in Philly, I was checking into it for Thanksgiving, but I was so emotionally fucked that I couldn't follow through. This year, no excuses.
To jump ahead to NYE- I had a thought about NYC for a minute. I looked into hotels and the ones that are still available, well, I'm not paying that amount to stay there. That's alcohol and clothes money. So I'm back to my original thoughts. Although, after my birthday..haha..I might need more than a month to recouperate. Speaking of my birthday- I was looking into getting a limo for that Friday night when we go out and become lushes for 4 or so hours. Matty says most of the clubs are within walking distance, however I'm thinking I might want to really do it up. Things are a little tight financially through this week but after that I will be fine so...it's something to consider. (why is every word I write looking like it's spelled wrong?) I do know this, though, I have figured out that the more money I have and make, the more I spend. I need to get control of that because once school starts, that will be my priority. I surely can't be galavanting all over the country on whims, doing the 'accidental shopping' thing, and then wondering where the hell all my money went and having to look in couch cushions for book and class money. Hah! I've always said I'm bad with money, but good at spending it. Just talking about this makes me want to go shopping.
Which means...goodnight!