HIndu and Buddhism wisdom
To know when to act and when to refrain from action, what is right action and what is wrong, what brings security, what brings freedom and what bondage: these are the signs of a sattvic intellect.
-Bhagavad Gita 18:30
Just as fog is dispelled by the strength of the sun
and is dispelled no other way,
preconception is cleared by the strength of realization.
There's no other way of clearing preconceptions.
Experience them as baseless dreams.
Experience them as ephemeral bubbles.
Experience them as insubstantial rainbows.
Experience them as indivisible space.
-Milarepa, "Drinking the Mountain Stream"
It is amazing how vehement and mean feedback I can receive just by being me...I often try to think twice,is it fair is it useful to go defent myself with some irony and sarcasms for these people are just being judgemental and narrow minded or maybe they've just been offensed by my pure frankness...
I cannot change this!
It would be silly and not knowing me to say I am searching for these spears, I am not trying to be hated or to provoke really, I used to when I was 15 maybe but it was rather an attitude and a way to clothe myself nothing much just to make people react
Now I am wondering if the fact of being a woman + being such a strong character strong mind + being able to think and to know what I want is something that make people feel envious or I dont know...
Mostly it's from guys these days that I am receiving mean words ,they seem to want me to be sad...
I think that wanting others sadness and being agressive to them shows just your own breaks and incapacities to be totally yourself...
I have been agressive and sometimes I still am agressive which is a very wrong choice...agressivity is losing control finally, it's letting anger lead your soul lead your being...agressivity is cheap!
so I am working this out as much as I can for I cannot be a cheap person!
whatever, we will always be hated and love for almost the same reasons:)
so after all when somebody hates me I feel sort of excited to arouse passion!
I was saying yesterday "bouaaaaaaaaah :(((((( "cries" :((((( everybody hates me everyone is mean to me !!!!!" kidding to a friend at msn but I trully find it fun to often been lynched like that!
Like those witches in the past burnt alive for having been different,strong and with a true personality;)
everybody have preconception of me but if they could pierce the bubble they would see that I am not mean and not haughty at all!and I am not a naive little girl dreaming to be saved or whatnot! this is annoying to see that!
I trully am my own saviour, I adore Goddess and God ,jesus,Buddha,I respect every gods and beliefs but though I might ask for protection I dont ask to be saved never ever!
recently I dreamt I saved a girl from drowning and it was beautiful really!such a feeling when I could reach her hand for I thought she was dead as she passed under the big boat( ugly imagination)
then I dreamt a handsome and very kind guy saved me from bombs, but he also told me he was in a commando and he had put the bombs,but he didn t want me to die in it...it was so romantic;) ahah
I loved his hugs and way of being so affectionate to me:)
I miss that!
I also dreamt of a cave and being in a very narrow elevator not knowing if it will lift me up or not and feeling stressed in it!!!( I never really enjoy myself in elevator but I can take them)
last night I dreamt again of a guy in love with me but I cant remember much
I've spent a nice weekend at my parents and now it's monday and I have a lot of things to do:
*writing letters( for jobs,penpals etc)
*tidying the room again and again and throwing some things away for a change
*painting my new wonderful canvas...I bought one with a very new shape for me to work in, I think it's 20X60 cm so cool...I am so stressed to fail it!!!!!arrrrrrgh
*shopping for a cutter and some little things ;)
seriously it's almost noon I really dont know if I'll have the time...i have slept too bad so I woke up at 10:30 and felt so exhausted and annoyed to wake up so late!!!I hate it really!
I think I'll do some yoga or gym alone to make myself be more energic:p
blessed be everyone:)
-Bhagavad Gita 18:30
Just as fog is dispelled by the strength of the sun
and is dispelled no other way,
preconception is cleared by the strength of realization.
There's no other way of clearing preconceptions.
Experience them as baseless dreams.
Experience them as ephemeral bubbles.
Experience them as insubstantial rainbows.
Experience them as indivisible space.
-Milarepa, "Drinking the Mountain Stream"
It is amazing how vehement and mean feedback I can receive just by being me...I often try to think twice,is it fair is it useful to go defent myself with some irony and sarcasms for these people are just being judgemental and narrow minded or maybe they've just been offensed by my pure frankness...
I cannot change this!
It would be silly and not knowing me to say I am searching for these spears, I am not trying to be hated or to provoke really, I used to when I was 15 maybe but it was rather an attitude and a way to clothe myself nothing much just to make people react
Now I am wondering if the fact of being a woman + being such a strong character strong mind + being able to think and to know what I want is something that make people feel envious or I dont know...
Mostly it's from guys these days that I am receiving mean words ,they seem to want me to be sad...
I think that wanting others sadness and being agressive to them shows just your own breaks and incapacities to be totally yourself...
I have been agressive and sometimes I still am agressive which is a very wrong choice...agressivity is losing control finally, it's letting anger lead your soul lead your being...agressivity is cheap!
so I am working this out as much as I can for I cannot be a cheap person!
whatever, we will always be hated and love for almost the same reasons:)
so after all when somebody hates me I feel sort of excited to arouse passion!
I was saying yesterday "bouaaaaaaaaah :(((((( "cries" :((((( everybody hates me everyone is mean to me !!!!!" kidding to a friend at msn but I trully find it fun to often been lynched like that!
Like those witches in the past burnt alive for having been different,strong and with a true personality;)
everybody have preconception of me but if they could pierce the bubble they would see that I am not mean and not haughty at all!and I am not a naive little girl dreaming to be saved or whatnot! this is annoying to see that!
I trully am my own saviour, I adore Goddess and God ,jesus,Buddha,I respect every gods and beliefs but though I might ask for protection I dont ask to be saved never ever!
recently I dreamt I saved a girl from drowning and it was beautiful really!such a feeling when I could reach her hand for I thought she was dead as she passed under the big boat( ugly imagination)
then I dreamt a handsome and very kind guy saved me from bombs, but he also told me he was in a commando and he had put the bombs,but he didn t want me to die in it...it was so romantic;) ahah
I loved his hugs and way of being so affectionate to me:)
I miss that!
I also dreamt of a cave and being in a very narrow elevator not knowing if it will lift me up or not and feeling stressed in it!!!( I never really enjoy myself in elevator but I can take them)
last night I dreamt again of a guy in love with me but I cant remember much
I've spent a nice weekend at my parents and now it's monday and I have a lot of things to do:
*writing letters( for jobs,penpals etc)
*tidying the room again and again and throwing some things away for a change
*painting my new wonderful canvas...I bought one with a very new shape for me to work in, I think it's 20X60 cm so cool...I am so stressed to fail it!!!!!arrrrrrgh
*shopping for a cutter and some little things ;)
seriously it's almost noon I really dont know if I'll have the time...i have slept too bad so I woke up at 10:30 and felt so exhausted and annoyed to wake up so late!!!I hate it really!
I think I'll do some yoga or gym alone to make myself be more energic:p
blessed be everyone:)