windmill, windmill for the land, turn forever, hand in hand
UMass Dartmouth liked my portfolio. I'M SO HAPPY!!! At least something good is happening in my life.
Things haven't been so good lately.
First, I rip my only good pair of work pants, and the next day I fall in the road and hurt my knee badly, in the process of ripping yet another pair of pants. It hurt sooooo bad too!
So then a few days later I go to school... and lose my cell phone. MY CELL PHONE. The phone my dad was kind enough to leave under my care!! And I have to go and loose it/have it stolen. I was so upset, you have no idea. I was BALLING my eyes out. BALLING. I'm still upset about it. At this point I feel like I don't deserve another one. Even though my dad told me replacing it would be no problem, I still feel SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO guilty.....
So that same day I go to RITZ Camera to pick up my portfolio slides, because the girls there when I dropped the film off TOLD ME IT WOULD BE READY BY THURSDAY, SO I GO ON THURSDAY! But ALAS, the dudes there told me it would take that long to SEND THEM OUT. Because APPARENTLY, they have to SEND IT OUT! To ATLANTA.... ATLANTA!!! X0 So THEY told me to come back NEXT WEEK to get them. I REALLY REAAAAAAALY hope that I can get them this time. If not, I will be SOOOOOO mad!!!!!!!!!! >.<***
And things with Joe and I haven't been too good either. He was so mad for like, two weeks straight. I didn't know what was wrong. So Thursday, (the same day I lost my phone and was denied my slides), we get into a huge fight. Well, it was more or less he was yelling at me and I was crying about everything, not just him yelling.... that scared me. That was the first time we've ever really screamed at eachother.
So I convinced him to call his therapist again, hoping that because he's 18 now, he can go on those meds he was SUPPOSED to have gone on that HIS FUCKING RETARDED-ASS PARENTS wouldn't let him go on when he wasn't a legal adult.
It's just alot of things that have been getting to me. College, school, work, money, my mom... the norm.
Just like, SO MANY things are going on.... I probably have to live on campus when I go to college, so I have to leave Cam by himself... with mom... I'm not very comfortable about that at all. I'm so used to taking care of him, I can't imagine leaving him in mom's care. I'm the one who wakes him up in the morning, I help him with homework, I make dinner alot of the time... I watch him closely whether he knows it or not... I'm just worried about his well-being when/if I go.
School is so stressful too. So much work to do with no study period. And upon all that, the STILL expect us to do college stuff. I'm so pissed at all my teachers because they think it's so easy for us, when it's really not.
Work has been absolute shit lately. First, they cut my hours, and now my own MOTHER refuses to drive me there. She will occasionally, but she always asks for an insane amount to cover gas, on top of her bitching and complaining about how I apparently "take advantage of her".... because the only thing I EVER ask of her is to drive me to work....
The Christmas season is turning into a huge bucket of smelly, grimy, moldy SHIT. The customers are all SO MEAN NOW. I can't believe how people can be so mean and angry at such a time of year. I hate how they'e so mean to ME, when I'm just trying to do my job. They make me feel like a piece of donkey turd when all I'm doing is being nice and trying to be helpful to them.
Trying to save money for school, too. But there's always something I have to pay for... I wish I either got paid more or had more hours to work without having to worry about missig homework or some ridiculous essay for world lit.
Yeah, so it's just alot of stuff I had to let out. I feel better...... ^.^
Things haven't been so good lately.
First, I rip my only good pair of work pants, and the next day I fall in the road and hurt my knee badly, in the process of ripping yet another pair of pants. It hurt sooooo bad too!
So then a few days later I go to school... and lose my cell phone. MY CELL PHONE. The phone my dad was kind enough to leave under my care!! And I have to go and loose it/have it stolen. I was so upset, you have no idea. I was BALLING my eyes out. BALLING. I'm still upset about it. At this point I feel like I don't deserve another one. Even though my dad told me replacing it would be no problem, I still feel SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO guilty.....
So that same day I go to RITZ Camera to pick up my portfolio slides, because the girls there when I dropped the film off TOLD ME IT WOULD BE READY BY THURSDAY, SO I GO ON THURSDAY! But ALAS, the dudes there told me it would take that long to SEND THEM OUT. Because APPARENTLY, they have to SEND IT OUT! To ATLANTA.... ATLANTA!!! X0 So THEY told me to come back NEXT WEEK to get them. I REALLY REAAAAAAALY hope that I can get them this time. If not, I will be SOOOOOO mad!!!!!!!!!! >.<***
And things with Joe and I haven't been too good either. He was so mad for like, two weeks straight. I didn't know what was wrong. So Thursday, (the same day I lost my phone and was denied my slides), we get into a huge fight. Well, it was more or less he was yelling at me and I was crying about everything, not just him yelling.... that scared me. That was the first time we've ever really screamed at eachother.
So I convinced him to call his therapist again, hoping that because he's 18 now, he can go on those meds he was SUPPOSED to have gone on that HIS FUCKING RETARDED-ASS PARENTS wouldn't let him go on when he wasn't a legal adult.
It's just alot of things that have been getting to me. College, school, work, money, my mom... the norm.
Just like, SO MANY things are going on.... I probably have to live on campus when I go to college, so I have to leave Cam by himself... with mom... I'm not very comfortable about that at all. I'm so used to taking care of him, I can't imagine leaving him in mom's care. I'm the one who wakes him up in the morning, I help him with homework, I make dinner alot of the time... I watch him closely whether he knows it or not... I'm just worried about his well-being when/if I go.
School is so stressful too. So much work to do with no study period. And upon all that, the STILL expect us to do college stuff. I'm so pissed at all my teachers because they think it's so easy for us, when it's really not.
Work has been absolute shit lately. First, they cut my hours, and now my own MOTHER refuses to drive me there. She will occasionally, but she always asks for an insane amount to cover gas, on top of her bitching and complaining about how I apparently "take advantage of her".... because the only thing I EVER ask of her is to drive me to work....
The Christmas season is turning into a huge bucket of smelly, grimy, moldy SHIT. The customers are all SO MEAN NOW. I can't believe how people can be so mean and angry at such a time of year. I hate how they'e so mean to ME, when I'm just trying to do my job. They make me feel like a piece of donkey turd when all I'm doing is being nice and trying to be helpful to them.
Trying to save money for school, too. But there's always something I have to pay for... I wish I either got paid more or had more hours to work without having to worry about missig homework or some ridiculous essay for world lit.
Yeah, so it's just alot of stuff I had to let out. I feel better...... ^.^