It's how I do.
Today was unexpected. A good kind of unexpected, mostly; I just think that my brain's about to explode. I feel like I've had so many conflicting thoughts that my mind is fighting to keep itself from pulling a Jean Grey and going BOOM. Have you ever felt like you've thought about something so much that after a while, you honestly don't know how you feel any more? People will often say, "I'm so confused, I don't know what to think." Usually, they don't really mean that. Usually, people can at least identify whether their feelings are ultimately positive or negative.
It's like reading a single word over and over again. After a while, it stops making sense.
My natural inclination is to think about everything so hard my face falls off, but at the moment, I'm actually trying NOT to think. I almost always allow myself to think, even if it's about things that will make me upset. But not tonight. Whether I have to play WoW until I pass out, or read about Catherine of Siena, or drink the pack of Redbull Ceara left on the TV -- I don't care. I can't afford to think any more, or else I will explode.
This is not to deny that today was productive and beneficial, especially for the long-term. It was. It's just that we went from 0 to 60 in about 2 seconds, and I'm still kind of shaking. I'd been on the moon for a while, and now I'm back on earth and having to re-learn what gravity feels like. I took a deepwater dive, and now I'm in the decompression chamber. Sudden changes, regardless of whether they're good, bad, or something in between, are always really jarring.
PS: Benes-leftovers and kitties on Friday. I approve.
PPS: Stef. Since I can't be there, I demand that food be sent back. Pie. Sausage. More pie. Sausage. You know.
PPPS: http://www.whiteboydj.com/babygotbook.html
It's like reading a single word over and over again. After a while, it stops making sense.
My natural inclination is to think about everything so hard my face falls off, but at the moment, I'm actually trying NOT to think. I almost always allow myself to think, even if it's about things that will make me upset. But not tonight. Whether I have to play WoW until I pass out, or read about Catherine of Siena, or drink the pack of Redbull Ceara left on the TV -- I don't care. I can't afford to think any more, or else I will explode.
This is not to deny that today was productive and beneficial, especially for the long-term. It was. It's just that we went from 0 to 60 in about 2 seconds, and I'm still kind of shaking. I'd been on the moon for a while, and now I'm back on earth and having to re-learn what gravity feels like. I took a deepwater dive, and now I'm in the decompression chamber. Sudden changes, regardless of whether they're good, bad, or something in between, are always really jarring.
PS: Benes-leftovers and kitties on Friday. I approve.
PPS: Stef. Since I can't be there, I demand that food be sent back. Pie. Sausage. More pie. Sausage. You know.
PPPS: http://www.whiteboydj.com/babygotbook.html