I used to waste my time dreaming of being alive...10/?
Ryan was practically asleep on my chest, his arms wrapped tight about my neck. He hadn’t been allowed to get off me all night, and the dares that he did do were done sitting on me, even the hideously embarrassing ones. His lips were against my throat though he probably didn’t realise it, but I sure as hell did...
“Guys,” I said softly, looking up at Spencer and Jon, who were laughing over some truth Jon had just answered. They looked over at me and I nodded down at Ryan. “This one’s asleep.”
Spencer yawned. “No wonder. It’s past two.”
“Um...where are we going to sleep?” I asked hesitantly, glancing at the beds. There were only two. I wasn’t sleepy anyway.
Spencer and Jon looked at each other. “Uhhh...”
“I’m sure as hell not sleeping on the floor,” I said firmly. “I don’t know about you two, but I’m gonna have to sleep with Ry, because he can’t sleep on the floor either, look at him.”
Jon grinned at Spencer.
“Aw, c’mon guys, don’t be so immature,” I mumbled, attempting to sit up. He was as thin as a twig, but when he was asleep, Ryan was not the easiest to lift.
I hoisted him up onto my lap and wrapped my hands around his legs, standing awkwardly and carrying him to the nearest bed, dumping him down as soon as his weight grew too much.
Spencer and Jon struggled up from where they were sitting. Spencer staggered towards his bed and flopped down on it, clearly more tired than he looked.
Jon moved slowly to the space next to Spencer’s bed, saying, “I’ll sleep on the floor, I guess.” Spencer indifferently threw down a blanket for him.
While I was busy trying to pull the covers over Ryan, I saw Jon glance timidly up at Spencer, and Spencer nod ever so slightly, when they thought I wasn’t looking. Jon wrapped himself up in his blanket, trying to get comfortable.
I smiled to myself, watching Ryan in his near-sleeping state as he blinked blearily, his gaze focussing on me.
He jumped, realising where he was, and I pushed him down, murmuring soothingly, “It’s okay, we’re going to bed now, I think you fell asleep.”
His golden eyes swept over me once and he blushed. I understood.
“Uh, yeah,” I said awkwardly. “We have to sleep together - um, sorry.”
Ryan turned even darker, swinging his soft brown hair in front of his face, but he mumbled, “Oh, um...that’s okay.”
He glanced nervously at Spencer, and I knew why.
“Can you turn off the light Brendon?” Spencer asked, grinning at me. I frowned.
Then I nodded and switched it off, fumbling in the dark as I tried to get back into bed, finally clambering under the covers next to Ryan’s slim form.
After a few minutes, I felt Ryan snuggle closer to me, sending a shiver through my system, and heard the rustle of a person trying to be inconspicuous as they crawled into the other bed from the floor.
Jon.
I smiled to myself, letting the warmth of Ryan’s body slowly seep into my skin as I fell asleep.
~Ryan~
Seeing Spencer curled up in bed with Jon made me confused. But I didn’t want to dwell on that.
I was in bed with Brendon.
Admittedly, not in that way, but we were still in bed together.
All the details of last night’s events flooded back to me, and my senses became sharply aware of my surroundings, of Brendon’s cheek pressed against my neck, pale skin even paler than usual in sleep, my hand cupped at his throat, the arm resting on my stomach. My bare stomach...
Okay, I was still dressed, thank god for that. My shirt must have ridden up while I was asleep, but that didn’t explain how his hand had gotten there...I pulled it down in a hurry, hoping that he hadn’t seen my...
He looked so perfect in sleep; a dull ache grew in my chest just looking at him, his tousled hair wild, dark eyelashes curving over his cheekbones perfectly.
I eventually became more and more aware of my position, sucking my breath in hurriedly as I realised that my legs were entwined with his, and that my knee was pressed against his crotch.
Hardly breathing, I tried to detach myself from him and watched in horror as a small smile played around his lips and he whispered, “Good morning to you too.”
I couldn’t help being mesmerised by his voice; rough, and slightly husky. He didn’t open his eyes, just licked his lips and winced.
“How - how long have you been awake?” I asked timidly, watching his face carefully.
He opened his eyes, looking amused as he glanced up and down my body under the sheets, his eyes lingering on our legs, making me flush.
“Around an hour,” he answered calmly, reaching down and taking hold of my thigh, untangling it from his. I tensed up, blood flooding into my cheeks.
I wish he wouldn’t do that...
I slipped the hand that rested at his throat back under the covers, pressing it to my own neck.
“Why didn’t you wake me up?” I asked, avoiding his gaze. I wondered how long I’d been wrapped around him like that. Thank god Jon and Spencer were still asleep.
“You’re...cute when you sleep,” he muttered, his voice still coarse. “It was interesting to watch.”
Despair flooded through me, clenching into a hard fist around my stomach.
“Why was it interesting?” I tried to sound angry, but I was actually reeling inside.
Did - did he just say I was cute?
I didn’t believe it.
Brendon glanced over at the other two, then back at me. “You talk.”
~Brendon~
Well, this is new. I’m in bed with another guy.
Actually, I’m in bed with someone, full stop. Now that’s new.
Ryan was still asleep, as were the others when I glanced at them, but Ryan captivated me the most. He was so...fragile looking when he slept.
Not to mention the way our arms and legs were connected, that most certainly held my attention, if his face and body didn’t.
His knee is...
He was definitely sleeping, because his breathing had slowed right down, and, being Ryan, he would have noticed where his knee was.
His face though...he looked odd to me for some reason that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. As I stared at him, I finally realised what was so different.
He looked so...calm. He seemed so untroubled, compared to what he was like at school, so tense and worried. It was nice to see him looking peaceful, but my presence always seemed to make him more and less stressed, in different ways, for some reason.
And now, he was completely unaware of it.
It was weird.
I sighed, pressing my face into his neck. He shifted slightly, mumbling something that I couldn’t quite understand.
I froze. He’d moved too much. Shivers of pleasure rippled up my spine, and I breathed deeply, trying to dispel the feeling.
He murmured my name, and I snapped my head up to look at him, croaking, “Yeah?”
He didn’t answer. I gently touched my fingers to his chin, but he didn’t move except for the steady rise and fall of his chest.
He talks in his sleep...this could be interesting.
He mumbled my name again and slid his hand up to my throat, pressing himself close to me. I vowed not to tell that I’d been awake when he’d done that.
I wrapped my arms around his waist, settling back into the bed. I watched him contentedly while he slept, occasionally drifting off myself before making myself wake up.
Resting my head in the crook of his neck, I heard his breathing change, and shut my eyes quickly. I felt him twist around beside me, then lie down again, moving my hand from his stomach and pulling his shirt down.
I had to restrain myself from smiling, which was difficult. He was so self-conscious, when, really, he had no need to be.
A few more seconds went past, and then he gasped softly, attempting to untangle our legs. I couldn’t help smiling now; it was too funny.
“Good morning to you too,” I said. I’d tried to make my voice sound so smooth, cool; all that came out was a stupid rasp. I mentally punched myself in the head.
My lips felt parched; it must have been a combination of sleep, laughter, and energy drink. That would explain the voice at least. I swept my tongue over them, wincing as it dragged over the dry skin.
“How - how long have you been awake?” he stuttered, and I could feel his gaze boring into my face. I opened my eyes to see him watching me, and casually swept my eyes up and down his figure lying under the sheets.
Heat radiated off his skin. The warmth was nice.
Slipping my fingers around his thigh, I carefully separated our legs and said, “Around an hour.”
“Why didn’t you wake me?” he asked, moving his hand from my neck.
Because it was too interesting...
“You’re cute when you sleep,” I rasped. “It was interesting to watch.”
Jeez, did I say that?
His facial expression changed rapidly, to one of horror.
“Why was it interesting?” His voice took on a sharp edge, and I flinched.
I didn’t want to say this, but it just spilled out like most other things I said.
“You talk.”
He sat up, pushing himself away from me. “What did I say?”
I ran my hands through my hair, pushing myself up against the headboard, sighing, “Nothing much, just, mumbling, you know.”
Is that what I am, nothing?
He looked unconvinced and I groaned. “Really, Ry.”
He should believe more, instead of just asking all the time. It gets tiresome, and he shouldn’t be so self-conscious either, I hate it. But then, how could he do those things last night, uh, it’s just stupid -
Pulling my knees up to my chest, I cleared my throat and muttered, “Why - why did your parents kick you out?”
I wasn’t sure if it was the best time to bring it up, but I wanted to know. He’d told me so little about himself, and I was desperate to know more. He just...he held that attraction for me, unusual though it may have been, and I’d decided not to let it go.
Ryan looked down at his hands, which he was twisting in his lap.
“Downstairs,” he whispered, rising and reaching for my hand. He dragged me off the bed and quietly opened the door, glancing back at Jon and Spencer who were still wrapped up in each other before we left.
Once we were in the lounge he sat down on the couch, curling up against the armrest. I sat close to him, putting my arms around his waist. The entire length of his body shuddered and I saw that he was crying.
I hated seeing him like this, even after only knowing him a week. It was painful to watch. He looked so broken.
He leaned into me, breathing deeply. “Sorry,” he choked, sniffing.
“Don’t be, Ry, it’s okay,” I murmured, what I hoped was soothingly.
He swallowed and took a deep breath. “M-my parents are alcoholics...they weren’t always, but they have been since I was about s-seven -“
My blood pounded in my ears.
Do I really want to hear this?
lol, this is bad. Bad bad bad. Ah well. Let me know :)