[GIANT ALIEN ROBOTS] I need a more explosive icon
EXPLOOOOOOOOSIOOOOOOOOOONS!!!!!!
So I went to go see Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen today. the original plan was to go last night but I went to buy tickets too late, lol whut
Now, I'd spoiled myself utterly and completely for this movie by picking up the novelization. Therefore, when I went to go see the movie I already knew pretty much everything that was going to happen, so the experience was not as mind-blowing as it might have been.
THAT BEING SAID.
Holy crap this movie has 'Micheal Bay' written all over it in big, bright, neon orange letters through and through. EXPLOSIONS. GIANT ALIEN ROBOTS EXPLODING STUFF. AND IT WAS AMAZING. The CGI was even more mind-blowing this time than last time. All the robots looked pretty much awesome and there were some really kickass fights that went down. In other words, the movie did exactly what I wanted it to - dazzled me with fight scenes and, well, GIANT ALIEN ROBOTS FROM SPACE.
There were a LOT of giant alien robots. The old crew is present in limited amounts - Ironhide and Ratchet appear, there is a LOT of Optimus Prime (as well there should be!), and of course Bumblebee runs around doing stuff. But the real stars of this movie were the Decepticons: Megatron-who-is-now-technically-Galvatron-but-they-didn't-change-his-name and Starscream participate in the same usual extremely abusive relationship they have in the original series, like to the point that I was pretty much cringing whenever they were alone anywhere together. I now understand why chicks are all over Starscream. He's a sniveling whiner but god you really just wanna make it all better when Megatron starts in on him. There were SO MANY NEW ROBOTS guys! And most of them were Decepticons. I think the official count was 42 robots? I didn't know most of their names.
Soundwave makes a limited appearance, taking over a military satellite and doing his job of completely infiltrating the human infrastructure. He releases Ravage, who looks like a really nasty one-eyed cat. although he wasn't named I swear that MUST have been Perceptor that crawled all over Sam at Megatron's behest - FOR GOODNESS SAKES HIS ALT-FORM WAS A MICROSCOPE. And as you all saw in the previews, Devastator appeared in this movie, 100 feet tall and taken out by a futuristic weapon of awesome called in by Simmons. He actually had a point besides sucking in sand, namely, tearing a pyramid apart. I THINK THE EGYPTIANS PROBABLY TOOK ISSUE WITH THIS.
There were also Insecticons! And one Pretender, a Decepticon named Alice. SHE WAS CREEPY GUYS. REALLY REALLY CREEPY.
The new Big Bad was technically the Fallen, a robot a little bigger than Optimus Prime who spends all his time making Megatron do all the work for him. Apparently he has PSYCHIC POWARS. They don't save him from Optimus Prime, though.
New Autobots to appear: Sideswipe, which, uh, is totally the new Black Robot of this movie. LORD GOD HE WAS SO FREAKING AWESOME. His protoform rode on wheels and he has twin blades installed in his arms - he cuts a Decepticon in half in the first ten minutes of the movie. YES YES YES. Mudflap and Skids are the rumored 'twins', the two minicars that ride around with Bumblebee in the previews. They're hodown hillbillies, complete with buck teeth, and like Sideswipe and Sunstreaker in G1 they are pretty much always fighting each other, but they make a great team. They were pretty hilarious and I loved watching them pick on Leo, the new guy for this movie. Also, at one point Bumblebee is forced to separate them and toss them out on their asses. I was like "Oh duuuuuude Bumblebee totally perscribes to the Prowl version of GTFO!"
Arcee appears as three motorcycles, which transform into three minibots which are all technically Arcee. She's not in the movie much but I kind of loved that the movie just never addressed her being a chick. It just wasn't an issue.
The big spoiler for this movie is the appearance of Seekers - in particular one Seeker, Jetfire, who is an S71 Blackbird. He's a Decepticon who switched to the Autobot side, who describes changing sides as 'a deeply personal decision' - right up the alley of how I understood Autobot vs. Decepticon. IN ANY CASE HE IS A CROTCHETY OLD MAN ROBOT. (Some of his dialogue I shall address elsewhere!) There's Wheelie, who is technically a Decepticon, but his alt-form is a minature monster truck and it's kind of hilarious, but especially when he realizes he can switch sides thanks to Jetfire. I want The Hilarious Adventures of Wheelie and Jetfire in the Alternate Universe Where Jetfire Lived. SO BAD.
Jetfire dies at the end of the movie by RIPPING OUT HIS OWN SPARK. The reasoning for this is to donate his parts to Optimus Prime, who totally gets to fly in this movie for like thirty seconds.
Dialogue that should have happened that didn't:
Skids: Dude, wouldja look at that, the Prime is totally flying!
Mudflap: Autobots don't fly, stupid! Somethin's wrong in your head!
Skids: No really, check it out, bro! Totally jet judo!
Mudflap: Hey, you're right! Yeah, awesome! You go, Prime!
Optimus: OH MY GOD THIS IS TOTALLY AWESOME BUT KIND OF HARD TO CONTROL
Ratchet: SIR YOU WERE DEAD FIVE MINUTES AGO GET YOUR AFT DOWN HERE SAFE AND SOUND OR I WILL TAKE YOU APART, PRIME OR NO PRIME.
Anyway.
Bumblebee gets his five minutes of fame when he takes down a Decepticon that is twice the size that he is with nothing but his hands and maybe (I'd have to rewatch to be sure) a machine gun. It's pretty awesome. =D He also gets to pretend to cry when Sam tells him he's not coming to college.
Enough about what 'bots appeared! The premise of this movie is pretty complicated. BASICALLY IT'S LIKE THIS:
In 17000 BC, the 13 original Primes assembled a weapon on Earth to suck the Sun dry - turn it into Energon, because apparently solar plasma is the most pure form of Energon. However, while they were at it they discovered that Earth had life on it. They were like, dude, we cannot drain this sun because we will kill sentient life. But one Prime, later to be the Fallen, was like 'WHO CARES WE NEED ENERGON'. The other Primes called bullshit on him. So they all fought the Fallen, but the Fallen (and his forces) were too much for the other 12 Primes. So, they covered up the weapon (built a pyramid), removed the key (the Matrix) from the weapon, and killed themselves as a fused fortress protecting the key.
To find the Key one needs the information in the Allspark. HAY GUESS WHAT GUYS, THE FANFICS WERE RIGHT. Sam is the Allspark now! Or at least contains its knowledge.
So over the course of the movie the Decepticons are basically after Sam - at first for what's in his head, and later after him because he's found the Matrix - and the Autobots and the US military are trying to protect him.
Oh, there's the minor detail that Prime, oh, DIES halfway through the movie. But luckily for us, being that he's a Prime, the Matrix of Leadership revives him! And just in time for the final fight. Basically Sam has to die to gain the power to use the Matrix on Optimus, because it takes sacrificing your life for the original 12 Primes to approve of a person, apparently.
Bumblebee remains my favorite character so I was a little sad that he wasn't in the movie more. When he was in the movie he was freaking awesome.
Guys, guys, this movie will dazzle you. If you come in and sit back to enjoy the ride then you will genuinely enjoy it. Lots of fights, lots of engaging characters (and annoying ones! But they're lovable anyway), and a twisted plot. My major crits of the movie are (1)it's a little too long, clocking in at 2 hours and 30 minutes. It could have been about 20-30 minutes shorter and not suffered for it (although those 20-30 minutes were MOSTLY awesome Alien Robot Fights, so). (2) Not enough transformations onscreen! I WANTED TO WATCH BEE TRANSFORM MORE DAMMIT, although a lot of nameless Decepticons transformed onscreen a lot, and (3)some logistic problems, but that's par for the course in a Michael Bay movie.
OVERALL I GIVE THIS A BIG THUMBS-UP. I'd rate it 7/10. Very very fun ride that warrants (for me!) a second viewing.
New Transformers information revealed will be covered in another post! BASICALLY ALL MY THEORIES HAVE BEEN BLOWN OUT THE WINDOW.
So I went to go see Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen today. the original plan was to go last night but I went to buy tickets too late, lol whut
Now, I'd spoiled myself utterly and completely for this movie by picking up the novelization. Therefore, when I went to go see the movie I already knew pretty much everything that was going to happen, so the experience was not as mind-blowing as it might have been.
THAT BEING SAID.
Holy crap this movie has 'Micheal Bay' written all over it in big, bright, neon orange letters through and through. EXPLOSIONS. GIANT ALIEN ROBOTS EXPLODING STUFF. AND IT WAS AMAZING. The CGI was even more mind-blowing this time than last time. All the robots looked pretty much awesome and there were some really kickass fights that went down. In other words, the movie did exactly what I wanted it to - dazzled me with fight scenes and, well, GIANT ALIEN ROBOTS FROM SPACE.
There were a LOT of giant alien robots. The old crew is present in limited amounts - Ironhide and Ratchet appear, there is a LOT of Optimus Prime (as well there should be!), and of course Bumblebee runs around doing stuff. But the real stars of this movie were the Decepticons: Megatron-who-is-now-technically-Galvatron-but-they-didn't-change-his-name and Starscream participate in the same usual extremely abusive relationship they have in the original series, like to the point that I was pretty much cringing whenever they were alone anywhere together. I now understand why chicks are all over Starscream. He's a sniveling whiner but god you really just wanna make it all better when Megatron starts in on him. There were SO MANY NEW ROBOTS guys! And most of them were Decepticons. I think the official count was 42 robots? I didn't know most of their names.
Soundwave makes a limited appearance, taking over a military satellite and doing his job of completely infiltrating the human infrastructure. He releases Ravage, who looks like a really nasty one-eyed cat. although he wasn't named I swear that MUST have been Perceptor that crawled all over Sam at Megatron's behest - FOR GOODNESS SAKES HIS ALT-FORM WAS A MICROSCOPE. And as you all saw in the previews, Devastator appeared in this movie, 100 feet tall and taken out by a futuristic weapon of awesome called in by Simmons. He actually had a point besides sucking in sand, namely, tearing a pyramid apart. I THINK THE EGYPTIANS PROBABLY TOOK ISSUE WITH THIS.
There were also Insecticons! And one Pretender, a Decepticon named Alice. SHE WAS CREEPY GUYS. REALLY REALLY CREEPY.
The new Big Bad was technically the Fallen, a robot a little bigger than Optimus Prime who spends all his time making Megatron do all the work for him. Apparently he has PSYCHIC POWARS. They don't save him from Optimus Prime, though.
New Autobots to appear: Sideswipe, which, uh, is totally the new Black Robot of this movie. LORD GOD HE WAS SO FREAKING AWESOME. His protoform rode on wheels and he has twin blades installed in his arms - he cuts a Decepticon in half in the first ten minutes of the movie. YES YES YES. Mudflap and Skids are the rumored 'twins', the two minicars that ride around with Bumblebee in the previews. They're hodown hillbillies, complete with buck teeth, and like Sideswipe and Sunstreaker in G1 they are pretty much always fighting each other, but they make a great team. They were pretty hilarious and I loved watching them pick on Leo, the new guy for this movie. Also, at one point Bumblebee is forced to separate them and toss them out on their asses. I was like "Oh duuuuuude Bumblebee totally perscribes to the Prowl version of GTFO!"
Arcee appears as three motorcycles, which transform into three minibots which are all technically Arcee. She's not in the movie much but I kind of loved that the movie just never addressed her being a chick. It just wasn't an issue.
The big spoiler for this movie is the appearance of Seekers - in particular one Seeker, Jetfire, who is an S71 Blackbird. He's a Decepticon who switched to the Autobot side, who describes changing sides as 'a deeply personal decision' - right up the alley of how I understood Autobot vs. Decepticon. IN ANY CASE HE IS A CROTCHETY OLD MAN ROBOT. (Some of his dialogue I shall address elsewhere!) There's Wheelie, who is technically a Decepticon, but his alt-form is a minature monster truck and it's kind of hilarious, but especially when he realizes he can switch sides thanks to Jetfire. I want The Hilarious Adventures of Wheelie and Jetfire in the Alternate Universe Where Jetfire Lived. SO BAD.
Jetfire dies at the end of the movie by RIPPING OUT HIS OWN SPARK. The reasoning for this is to donate his parts to Optimus Prime, who totally gets to fly in this movie for like thirty seconds.
Dialogue that should have happened that didn't:
Skids: Dude, wouldja look at that, the Prime is totally flying!
Mudflap: Autobots don't fly, stupid! Somethin's wrong in your head!
Skids: No really, check it out, bro! Totally jet judo!
Mudflap: Hey, you're right! Yeah, awesome! You go, Prime!
Optimus: OH MY GOD THIS IS TOTALLY AWESOME BUT KIND OF HARD TO CONTROL
Ratchet: SIR YOU WERE DEAD FIVE MINUTES AGO GET YOUR AFT DOWN HERE SAFE AND SOUND OR I WILL TAKE YOU APART, PRIME OR NO PRIME.
Anyway.
Bumblebee gets his five minutes of fame when he takes down a Decepticon that is twice the size that he is with nothing but his hands and maybe (I'd have to rewatch to be sure) a machine gun. It's pretty awesome. =D He also gets to pretend to cry when Sam tells him he's not coming to college.
Enough about what 'bots appeared! The premise of this movie is pretty complicated. BASICALLY IT'S LIKE THIS:
In 17000 BC, the 13 original Primes assembled a weapon on Earth to suck the Sun dry - turn it into Energon, because apparently solar plasma is the most pure form of Energon. However, while they were at it they discovered that Earth had life on it. They were like, dude, we cannot drain this sun because we will kill sentient life. But one Prime, later to be the Fallen, was like 'WHO CARES WE NEED ENERGON'. The other Primes called bullshit on him. So they all fought the Fallen, but the Fallen (and his forces) were too much for the other 12 Primes. So, they covered up the weapon (built a pyramid), removed the key (the Matrix) from the weapon, and killed themselves as a fused fortress protecting the key.
To find the Key one needs the information in the Allspark. HAY GUESS WHAT GUYS, THE FANFICS WERE RIGHT. Sam is the Allspark now! Or at least contains its knowledge.
So over the course of the movie the Decepticons are basically after Sam - at first for what's in his head, and later after him because he's found the Matrix - and the Autobots and the US military are trying to protect him.
Oh, there's the minor detail that Prime, oh, DIES halfway through the movie. But luckily for us, being that he's a Prime, the Matrix of Leadership revives him! And just in time for the final fight. Basically Sam has to die to gain the power to use the Matrix on Optimus, because it takes sacrificing your life for the original 12 Primes to approve of a person, apparently.
Bumblebee remains my favorite character so I was a little sad that he wasn't in the movie more. When he was in the movie he was freaking awesome.
Guys, guys, this movie will dazzle you. If you come in and sit back to enjoy the ride then you will genuinely enjoy it. Lots of fights, lots of engaging characters (and annoying ones! But they're lovable anyway), and a twisted plot. My major crits of the movie are (1)it's a little too long, clocking in at 2 hours and 30 minutes. It could have been about 20-30 minutes shorter and not suffered for it (although those 20-30 minutes were MOSTLY awesome Alien Robot Fights, so). (2) Not enough transformations onscreen! I WANTED TO WATCH BEE TRANSFORM MORE DAMMIT, although a lot of nameless Decepticons transformed onscreen a lot, and (3)some logistic problems, but that's par for the course in a Michael Bay movie.
OVERALL I GIVE THIS A BIG THUMBS-UP. I'd rate it 7/10. Very very fun ride that warrants (for me!) a second viewing.
New Transformers information revealed will be covered in another post! BASICALLY ALL MY THEORIES HAVE BEEN BLOWN OUT THE WINDOW.