the days of a squid
two days ago:
well here a update for you the people. i crossed the international dateline so its about to monday here. i lost a day weird feeling. my time has gone back by like 12 hours. and i haven't slept that well. i doing a bit of mess serving. so i am serving food for 90 days. i am about my 40 day into it. i miss my real job. but we all have to get ir done. i have had some interesting converstations with the marines on board. we talk about the military and life and how we all been let down and lost a lot good girls cause we had the horny glasses on. i just realized how stupid we are lol. but in a sense i wouldn't trade these moments for a bored moment at home for nothing. sure i have a gf right now but i have these cherised memories of pitch black sea in foregin places i am going to right now. how many people are sailing oustide asia right now? i am are u? but the lonely depressing state i am in is a downer. i just want to be with a nice girl who will appericate what i have to offer. instead i am on a ship were everyone talking about getting "paided for girls" but i m just chilling thinking about going home so i can get the girl of my dreams. probably that time i will be late. but late better then never trying at all right? i mean come on i pulled more miracles out of my little mind then half have seen in a life time. and its all about the jokes right? who doesn't like someone that makes them laugh. and don't quote me on this but life.
today. well i got a email from the first person today and it was becca it was like being in bootcamp recieving your first letter. i don't know what it is about the military but u feel like no one loves u or misses u. u just feel alone and u start to go thru this phase of dealing with that lonelyness. its gets hard and u get so depressed and right now my world upside down because of this fucking storm out to sea fucking waves going over my ship and making rock like a bitch. its to dangerous to go outside so were secured to the inside of the ship. i hope it gets better cause if i dont' see the stars soon i will go crazy. let alone if i can't just relax with out falling out my rack ill will choke someone. i am trying to quit smoking but the days play out my heart to the extent of me wanting to hurt people. so i do the most common thing and smoke it off. i started my work out plan again. and i hope to come home in better shape. but this rocky ass ship is killing me. but other then that plz write me more and have a fun life peace.
well here a update for you the people. i crossed the international dateline so its about to monday here. i lost a day weird feeling. my time has gone back by like 12 hours. and i haven't slept that well. i doing a bit of mess serving. so i am serving food for 90 days. i am about my 40 day into it. i miss my real job. but we all have to get ir done. i have had some interesting converstations with the marines on board. we talk about the military and life and how we all been let down and lost a lot good girls cause we had the horny glasses on. i just realized how stupid we are lol. but in a sense i wouldn't trade these moments for a bored moment at home for nothing. sure i have a gf right now but i have these cherised memories of pitch black sea in foregin places i am going to right now. how many people are sailing oustide asia right now? i am are u? but the lonely depressing state i am in is a downer. i just want to be with a nice girl who will appericate what i have to offer. instead i am on a ship were everyone talking about getting "paided for girls" but i m just chilling thinking about going home so i can get the girl of my dreams. probably that time i will be late. but late better then never trying at all right? i mean come on i pulled more miracles out of my little mind then half have seen in a life time. and its all about the jokes right? who doesn't like someone that makes them laugh. and don't quote me on this but life.
today. well i got a email from the first person today and it was becca it was like being in bootcamp recieving your first letter. i don't know what it is about the military but u feel like no one loves u or misses u. u just feel alone and u start to go thru this phase of dealing with that lonelyness. its gets hard and u get so depressed and right now my world upside down because of this fucking storm out to sea fucking waves going over my ship and making rock like a bitch. its to dangerous to go outside so were secured to the inside of the ship. i hope it gets better cause if i dont' see the stars soon i will go crazy. let alone if i can't just relax with out falling out my rack ill will choke someone. i am trying to quit smoking but the days play out my heart to the extent of me wanting to hurt people. so i do the most common thing and smoke it off. i started my work out plan again. and i hope to come home in better shape. but this rocky ass ship is killing me. but other then that plz write me more and have a fun life peace.