nothing is ever simple
i hate being confused all the time. i never know what i want or what to do about it.
i finally broke up with adam for good though. at least i know that i dont want to be with him. and now steve and i are together, which is awesome. he is such a sweetheart. and you would think ok im happy now things are going good.
then mark hits me with this: he doesnt think that he's gonna go back to school next year. so that means we could be together again. this is all ive wanted all along, just to be able to be with mark again. but recently, like within the past few weeks, ive been trying to not be so attached to him, maybe even get over him a little. well, of course i wasnt even close to over him yet, but still i had finally realized i cant be so attached to him if the possibility of us getting back together cant even happen for 4 yrs. then he tells me this and i was like what does that mean, that we could get back together? and he was like well i hope so, but its up to you. but he wants to. and he said he would even come down here every day if i wanted him to. so it wouldnt be a problem not being able to see him. so now i have NO IDEA what to do.
i love mark so much and i really wanna be with him. but he isnt positive yet if he's not going back to school. and i really really like steve. it just seems like nothing can ever be simple for me.... like i always have all these hard decisions i have to make between people and whatever and i never know what the fuck i want!
i dont know. maybe i'll just wait it out and see how things go with steve.
dinner time! im starving..