TM #209: What Are You Afraid Of?
[Locked from Everyone]
What am I afraid of you ask? Dearly Disturbed Dexter, despite not being a real human, is not that much different than anyone else in this regard. I am afraid of consequences. Like the dirty cop, the crack dealer, the woman having an affair or the six year old with his hand in the cookie jar, I am afraid of getting caught. I am terrified I will make a mistake and indeed I have had close calls. The very thought quickens my heart rate, speeds up my breathing and leaves my skin unpleasantly clammy.
You see our justice system is devised to be empty. It is without emotion or empathy. Our justice system is soulless. It is quite frankly very like me. A jury is encouraged, pushed, cajoled and duty bound to find guilt or innocence. It is not to decide whether or not someone like Last Nurse deserved to die. In fact our system does not judge the victim at all. Even if the victim had victims.
It is why monsters such as our beloved Dexter are necessary. However, necessary or not, I am still very much afraid of getting caught.
You see, our Delicate Dexter would not do well in confinement. For one thing there is no release for the Dark Passenger. It is key to my existence. Harry knew this. Harry provided a path for the Dark Passenger and he must walk it.
There is also the matter of socialization. I play a very good human. Occasionally my nuances are a bit off but everyone says ‘That Dexter, he’s so very charming.’ I mimic emotions and interest that I never feel. However, it is exhausting. I can not imagine having to maintain that mask twenty four hours a day, seven days a week.
No, my friends, Dear Dexter would much rather be Dead Dexter if indeed we ever do get caught.