Comments | velvet_mace: Undesirable: Chapter 12

velvet_mace

Undesirable: Chapter 12

Jan 13, 2009 14:53

TITLE: Undesirable (A vampire novel)
RATING: NC-17 (This chapter R)
GENRE: Porn with plot -- heavy on the plot. Action/adventure, some black humor, some romance.
PAIRINGS: George x everyone. Mostly Slash, some het, three and moresomes. Vampire sex.
WARNINGS: (this chapter) violence.
WORD COUNT: 5472

( Chapter 12 )

original, undesirable

Comments 28

drelfina January 13 2009, 23:44:43 UTC

Of all the things to happen to Lady Darlene, that was NOT what I expected.

*calms heart*

And Lord Jeffery - despite his act, despite his pomposity, his arrogance, there's something pretty sympathetic about him, mostly in the tiny glimpses that appears to be sponatenous or when he's surprised. And how he took care of Wally.

God, I'm so sorry for him. I hope there was NOT a mental link between them, because... because...

For his sake I hope that the Lady Darlene is safe. T_T

velvet_mace January 14 2009, 00:02:21 UTC

Out of curiosity what were you expecting to happen with Darlene?

I'm trying to make Jeffrey into a fun bad-guy. It sounds like I'm succeeding. :D

There was no link between Wally and Darlene. She was waaaay too busy to bother with him at that point. And Jeffrey would have shielded him anyway. Jeffrey may be totally insincere and manipulative, but he's got his limits. I think being in a strange vampires house while she and her friends rips your patron to pieces in front of you is traumatic enough.

drelfina January 14 2009, 00:08:47 UTC

I... I don't know. Utter humiliation, perhaps, or something else... I did not expect the vampires to totally rip into her, tearing her into bloody chunks.

He IS... I know I've managed to make some bad-guys like that. Fun and you just can NOT hate him, can't help LIKING him. Except you really hope you won't ever meet such a person in real life, because DAMN is he manipulative.

Poor Wally. Poor George. I hope Wally forgives him. :(

(Also, when Nadette asked for Jeffery's forgiveness, the first thing I thought of was D&S's sort of sub. Not merely vassal status. But that's because I have a dirty, dirty mind.)

velvet_mace January 14 2009, 00:36:30 UTC

Vampire submission is thing unto itself. When mind powers are included, it can't just be ordinary servitude. Nadette of course wouldn't be interested in Jeffrey sexually, but she'd have gotten her worth out of him if he'd agreed. I think he'd much rather have it be a D&S sort of thing.

Oh yeah, no, Jeffrey would be a terrible person to meet IRL. A normal person would be toast in his hands.

I have met an engaging, charismatic, manipulative and fun sociopath IRL before. Thank goodness, he had no interest whatsoever in me and he had no sadistic tendencies. One of those rare genuinely nice people who simply and pathologically can't tell right from wrong. He was utterly fascinating to watch, real popcorn material. He walked in the room and you just sat back for the show. Eventually his sociopathy caught up with him and he got tossed in jail for something he considered entirely reasonable but was unbelievably illegal. To this day, I don't think he has a clue what he did wrong or why he was prosecuted.

Thread 15

arkanefyre January 14 2009, 05:11:43 UTC

....Dude, that was awesome. I was actually expecting something similiar to happen to Dajingaling. Much worse actually, apart from death. Splitting up her harem with the others, her wealth, etc. More ritualistic - before a court where she had a slightly better chance to defend herself.

As I've said, I do so love Lord Jeffrey. He does for some reason, remind me of Professor Dumbledore though. Not entirely sure why.

orion117 January 18 2009, 13:38:51 UTC

Wow, I should just give up trying to guess where the story is going because you always surprise me. Wally showing up was something I hadn't even thought about. The interplay between Jeffrey and the two humans was interesting. I can't wait to see what he thinks he has up his sleeve for the auction.

velvet_mace January 18 2009, 18:46:01 UTC

I'm curious to know what you guessed would happen. Where did it seem like I was going with this?

Oh Jeffrey definitely has something up his sleeve. To me it seems glaringly obvious, because I've shown him pulling his plan together in the background of the last couple of chapters. But I'm guessing all that's coming off as random details to everyone else.

(The comment has been removed)

velvet_mace January 21 2009, 16:26:25 UTC

It can be pretty well assumed that anyone I bother to name (who isn't physically in the room) will be brought into play eventually. There may be exceptions, but in general, I wouldn't have bothered to name them if they were more than just a casual reference.

velvet_mace January 21 2009, 16:48:05 UTC

Oh and thanks!

Love it, again! ;-) regnet January 22 2009, 02:32:49 UTC

I'm loving Jeffrey more and more. What an intriguing character. ;-)
And kudos to you for devising him!

"And I'll even bid on him tomorrow night, if you so desire, though I doubt your pockets are deep enough to afford him."
She's bidding on Jeffrey's behalf?

Haven't seen the maid yet. You mentioned that you'd talk about that part of the story... I guess the plot expanded mid-way. Which is Great, of course! ;-) But I was just curious how your devious mind works... because dang, it has me at the edge of my seat! ;-)

Thanks for your updates!

Re: Love it, again! ;-) velvet_mace January 22 2009, 16:29:20 UTC

Oops! Fixed.

I'm glad you like Jeffrey.

The maid is one of those details that I know in my mind happened, but may not actually get into the story -- because ultimately it's not that important. There's lots of much more important things going on. The plot was always going this way. I had the entire story mapped out before I started writing. I am glad that my plot isn't an obvious one (though I do work to put in hints -- even now I'm preparing for things that won't happen 5 or more chapters down the road).