(no subject)

[veldez]

i dont know what it is.
i just don't feel
anything, anymore
i don't care
because i don't know what's real and what's not
i don't feel fully awake
just numb
absent
i'm trying to choose my own direction right now
instead of having it chosen for me
i'm 20 years years old for christ's sake
i'm not ready to settle
i'm supposed to be speeding up right now
but instead i'm waiting
to wake up
to come back
to feel something

just something