not feeling too optimistic
We've been back together for about two months now, and honestly... This isn't working. When it's good, it's really good! But when it's bad, I feel like running away. He twists thing I say so he can have a reason to be upset with me. It seems like he's been pretty doubtful about the outcome of this from the get. Almost like he just wants to get it over with, he picks ridiculous fights with me over such minuscule things. This sucks. I have no job, no money, no home right now. It's like fucking deja vu. A year later. Maybe thom yorke was right when he wrote Karma Police... This is what you get when you mess with love. Just sucks. I wish there was a switch, to just make me stop loving him. Better yet, a time machine to erase it all. All of it. The loft, elliott, the pregnancy, the marriage, the baby, the surgery, the break up. All of it. I want it all just gone. God this blows. :( why me? I never ever wanted any of this. None of it. And ya know, I still don't. I'm just trying to make the best of a terrible situation. And michael is completely preventing me from doing so. It's just getting worse and worse. :/ I don't know what to do. I'm fucked.