Asian fandoms and being territorial
I got inspired by this fandom post on Asian Junkie and another post discussing International and Korean fans in Kpop fandom. Even the UnitedKpop post on race got my brain buzzing.
As someone who used to be a regular contributor in many kinds of fandoms ranging from Rurouni Kenshin, Heroes to Jrock music fangirling and a lot more in the days (yes I used to be a rabid fangirl who did those bad things like bashing characters and regretted it), I have recently developed an understanding as to why a large number of native Asians tend to be...selfish and not always wanting to share their fandom culture. Mainly because it's started to happen to me as I get older. I think this is a bad sign.
I won't deny my occasional reluctance to 'share' anything Chinese or my fondness of all things Animanga or Hallyu. School and ignorance of culture and nationality from the youth does not give me a good, everlasting impression of society in general. It also doesn't help with China's sudden boom in wealth and economy that Mandarin Chinese has officially become a big power in the language world. You gain fluency in that language and people will kiss your feet or shower you with endless Wo Ai Ni.
In a way I feel intimidated over the whole idea of Weeaboos/Koreaboos etc barking in my backyard. You'd think I should be appreciative of non-Asians appreciating my Chinese culture/Asian stuff in general (yes it is easy to talk fan things with them I agree) but for some reason...I can't do so with a genuine feeling. Again it boils down to envy. Because they could do what I could never do and that is actually show genuine motivation to learn something about Asian culture, which includes the language. I still want to learn Korean and Japanese but I have to deal with Chinese. Unfortunately for so many reasons (go back to my previous posts and you'll see what I mean) it doesn't bode well with my brain.
Non-Asians don't have the restrictions I had. They don't have to worry about not impressing their elders as much or getting straight A's. Sure I've "tried" to talk about my personal interests with very English people but that didn't work out so I just didn't bother any further and you know what that's fine by me because I get to keep my interests secret and only shared with a few individuals who are okay with it. The Weeaboos/Asianphiles who constantly babble on about their Asian fondness and manage to get their family members into it makes me a little jealous to be honest. My household and relatives judge me for daring to touch Japanese or Korean culture, considering it a waste of time and I get plenty of sneers from folk who are much more soulless/boring than me. It's not just Kpop fandom that will never be united, the various Chinese from different parts of Asia will never be united too. Not with backstabbers, arrogance and too much extremism in the way.
I do recall my much younger self wondering why there were even British people who dared to set foot in Chinese restaurants when Chinatown was for the Chinese community but that dislike eventually went away and I didn't go to Leicester Square as much as before unless it was required to walk through it to get to another destination. We just didn't visit Chinatown much because we started to pay attention to our health from too much Dim Sum.
Getting into Hallyu, Animanga or music of the Japanese and Korean variety has allowed me to appreciate being Asian. It gives me hope. It makes me realise it's not so bad being yellow. I don't think it makes me any better than the self-righteous bananas who hardly give a damn about their skin colour or have had no difficulties like me or perhaps the sellouts who are posers just because they managed to snag a hot white guy/woman and got married but I at least take some notice of what is Asian (pop) culture.
I also have a bit more hope when it comes to looking for a potential other. I know there are genuinely nice, attractive fellow yellow people out there now that I've succumbed to these specific fandoms (I DO NOT expect a guy to look exactly like my favourite Korean actor however my eyes have developed a slightly better radar when I'm observing people). On the other hand that ounce of hope is easily shattered now that we've got non-Asians or Eurasians who are a lot prettier than pudgy full-blooded ethnically Chinese like myself. Like how the West approach the Asian fetish, especially with Asian women, the Eurasians and non-Asians are deemed more exotic for (famous) Asian stars. Why else have they been chosen to appear in music videos or advertisements?
British people have the likes of Tom Hiddleston, Colin Firth, Sean Connery, Christian Bale, Benedict Cumberbatch and Tom Hardy to swoon over. The Asian females have a few Koreans, Taiwanese, Japanese or Chinese male stars to admire and it tackles the endless ugly Asian male stereotype. Why yes I like Tom Hiddleston and Christian Bale along with Hayashi Yoshiki, Song Seung Heon and G-Dragon/Kwon Jiyong. You ask my six year old self who I admire I'd most likely say a Caucasian singer because Chinese singers and actors didn't spring to my mind back then. Partly because I had too many dilemmas to tackle aside from homework.
Watching MAMA 2012 which was broadcast in Hong Kong, made me feel different while watching. I felt a little more 'at home' and wished I was in the crowd, seeing my favourite singers with my own eyes. The event was in an Asian country with a large number of Asian Kpop fans watching with excitement. Yes I'm aware of how rowdy Asian music fans can be because I've encountered it at gigs but it wasn't just them FYI.
Another reason for the slight threat from non-Asians trying to embrace the Asian culture, I wouldn't want to see it being tarnished by stupidity. If a person was naturally ignorant about cultures yet wanted to learn more about Chinese culture and took the mickey out of it or wanted to glamorise his/her knowledge from his/her Sinophilia I would not want to be close to idiots like that and rather they be banished to another planet (that's what I'd do if I had the powers of a God). Of course I apply that to Chinese migrants who worsen the Chinese stereotypes when they arrive in the West. Yes I know that's how they behave but when you get constant jeers and assumptions you're like the FOBs it becomes hell.
As someone who used to be a regular contributor in many kinds of fandoms ranging from Rurouni Kenshin, Heroes to Jrock music fangirling and a lot more in the days (yes I used to be a rabid fangirl who did those bad things like bashing characters and regretted it), I have recently developed an understanding as to why a large number of native Asians tend to be...selfish and not always wanting to share their fandom culture. Mainly because it's started to happen to me as I get older. I think this is a bad sign.
I won't deny my occasional reluctance to 'share' anything Chinese or my fondness of all things Animanga or Hallyu. School and ignorance of culture and nationality from the youth does not give me a good, everlasting impression of society in general. It also doesn't help with China's sudden boom in wealth and economy that Mandarin Chinese has officially become a big power in the language world. You gain fluency in that language and people will kiss your feet or shower you with endless Wo Ai Ni.
In a way I feel intimidated over the whole idea of Weeaboos/Koreaboos etc barking in my backyard. You'd think I should be appreciative of non-Asians appreciating my Chinese culture/Asian stuff in general (yes it is easy to talk fan things with them I agree) but for some reason...I can't do so with a genuine feeling. Again it boils down to envy. Because they could do what I could never do and that is actually show genuine motivation to learn something about Asian culture, which includes the language. I still want to learn Korean and Japanese but I have to deal with Chinese. Unfortunately for so many reasons (go back to my previous posts and you'll see what I mean) it doesn't bode well with my brain.
Non-Asians don't have the restrictions I had. They don't have to worry about not impressing their elders as much or getting straight A's. Sure I've "tried" to talk about my personal interests with very English people but that didn't work out so I just didn't bother any further and you know what that's fine by me because I get to keep my interests secret and only shared with a few individuals who are okay with it. The Weeaboos/Asianphiles who constantly babble on about their Asian fondness and manage to get their family members into it makes me a little jealous to be honest. My household and relatives judge me for daring to touch Japanese or Korean culture, considering it a waste of time and I get plenty of sneers from folk who are much more soulless/boring than me. It's not just Kpop fandom that will never be united, the various Chinese from different parts of Asia will never be united too. Not with backstabbers, arrogance and too much extremism in the way.
I do recall my much younger self wondering why there were even British people who dared to set foot in Chinese restaurants when Chinatown was for the Chinese community but that dislike eventually went away and I didn't go to Leicester Square as much as before unless it was required to walk through it to get to another destination. We just didn't visit Chinatown much because we started to pay attention to our health from too much Dim Sum.
Getting into Hallyu, Animanga or music of the Japanese and Korean variety has allowed me to appreciate being Asian. It gives me hope. It makes me realise it's not so bad being yellow. I don't think it makes me any better than the self-righteous bananas who hardly give a damn about their skin colour or have had no difficulties like me or perhaps the sellouts who are posers just because they managed to snag a hot white guy/woman and got married but I at least take some notice of what is Asian (pop) culture.
I also have a bit more hope when it comes to looking for a potential other. I know there are genuinely nice, attractive fellow yellow people out there now that I've succumbed to these specific fandoms (I DO NOT expect a guy to look exactly like my favourite Korean actor however my eyes have developed a slightly better radar when I'm observing people). On the other hand that ounce of hope is easily shattered now that we've got non-Asians or Eurasians who are a lot prettier than pudgy full-blooded ethnically Chinese like myself. Like how the West approach the Asian fetish, especially with Asian women, the Eurasians and non-Asians are deemed more exotic for (famous) Asian stars. Why else have they been chosen to appear in music videos or advertisements?
British people have the likes of Tom Hiddleston, Colin Firth, Sean Connery, Christian Bale, Benedict Cumberbatch and Tom Hardy to swoon over. The Asian females have a few Koreans, Taiwanese, Japanese or Chinese male stars to admire and it tackles the endless ugly Asian male stereotype. Why yes I like Tom Hiddleston and Christian Bale along with Hayashi Yoshiki, Song Seung Heon and G-Dragon/Kwon Jiyong. You ask my six year old self who I admire I'd most likely say a Caucasian singer because Chinese singers and actors didn't spring to my mind back then. Partly because I had too many dilemmas to tackle aside from homework.
Watching MAMA 2012 which was broadcast in Hong Kong, made me feel different while watching. I felt a little more 'at home' and wished I was in the crowd, seeing my favourite singers with my own eyes. The event was in an Asian country with a large number of Asian Kpop fans watching with excitement. Yes I'm aware of how rowdy Asian music fans can be because I've encountered it at gigs but it wasn't just them FYI.
Another reason for the slight threat from non-Asians trying to embrace the Asian culture, I wouldn't want to see it being tarnished by stupidity. If a person was naturally ignorant about cultures yet wanted to learn more about Chinese culture and took the mickey out of it or wanted to glamorise his/her knowledge from his/her Sinophilia I would not want to be close to idiots like that and rather they be banished to another planet (that's what I'd do if I had the powers of a God). Of course I apply that to Chinese migrants who worsen the Chinese stereotypes when they arrive in the West. Yes I know that's how they behave but when you get constant jeers and assumptions you're like the FOBs it becomes hell.