(no subject)
Everything was going so fucking well. and now i dont know what the fuck i'm going to do. I was going to councelling, i had told me doctor i had talked to the eating dissorder clinic and at each place i was VERY ADDAMENT about NOT WANTING MY FATHER INVOVLED. I had MADE SURE THAT WAS VERY CLEAR. I HAD SAID NOT TO CALL MY HOUSE. I HAD INSISTED THEY CALL MY CELL PHONE YET THEY STILL CALLED MY HOUSE. but it was ok becuase they didnt say anything incriminating . that time. and i was assured that they would be very descreet about it. i asked over and over. this was the ONE THING I cared about; was that my father not find out. and i was assured over and over that there was no way he could find out. BUT THEY FUCKING CALLED AND HE ANSWERED AND THEY SAID THEY WERE CALLING FROM THE EATING DISORDER CLINIC AS A REFERAL FROM MY DOCTOR. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON. i DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. I DONT. I'M SITTING HERE SCREAMING WIHT TEARS RUNNING DOWN MY FACE. I'M SHAKING AND HYPERVENTALATING. THIS WAS THE ONE THING I REALLY CARED ABOUT AND NOW ITS RUINED. i dont know if i can liuve here anymore. they didnt beleive me when i said it was very important. i cant explain why but my life is over. i'm not going to get help anymore i'm not going to the eating disorder clinic. they fucked it all up. i was on my way. i was going to be alright. and now i cant. i cant. i dont know what to do. I cant calm down; i cant stop screaming. help me.