24: Season 1
1x01.
-The files were mislabeled so for a minute I thought the first episode had a previously, and I thought "OMG AWESOME."
-Oh credits! Spot the b-list actors!
-You disobeyed Jack Bauer. You are a stupid child.
-Jack Bauer: The only man you can trust.
-Sleazy plane guy: evil?
-Oh, sleazy plane girl: Eviler.
-Plane: Needs more snakes.
-Jack Bauer: Nothing is too much.
-Invasion of privacy: Jack Bauer makes it sexy.
-Palmer: Will be saved and learn to trust the agency because of Jack Bauer's magic cock.
-No one plays the game like Jack Bauer!
-Gun binders. I love random assault.
-What do you see in Jack? Clearly this man is blind, dumb and crazy.
-Agency hacking to track daughter? Awesome, yet creepy. But the daughter lacks clever Bauer genes, so justified.
-First Jack interrogation! Hooray!
-Sadly unviolent interrogation.
-Yay! Spot the evil person part one was successful! But she ditched the high heels. Clever terrorist you.
-Ha ha. Richard Burgi. Oh b-list you.
-I predict this daughter plot will become tedious. Quickly.
-Oh the required "just missing each other!" Damn you tv.
1x02
-Events occur in real time! Oh drama
-Goatee guy wants a half hour in Jack's office
-Nina's a convincing liar: EVIL.
-God these girls are dumb.
-Oh, keycard hacking. Awesome.
-Yep. Evil. Knew it. Sleezy mustache guy.
-Oh cute couple. So doomed.
-Frat boy terrorists: the greatest threat to our American way of life.
-Oh Jack, way to sneak in to places.
-Oh hacker boy! Goatee clearly marks you as from evil parallel world. But no, Nina's evil. I am conflicted.
-Gun confrontation.
-"How high does this conspiracy go?" Oh dramatic irony.
-And topless lady. Oh Fox.
-Goatee man has a sexy stalking thing for Jack, doesn't he?
-What's with Jacks and having sexual tension with everyone?
-Oh Jack crawling. Sexy, even with broken glass.
-Jack Death Toll: Two
-Wait, did he just cut off a finger? Hard core.
-Oh he has a family. So doomed.
-Dude, are they cleaning the store? Lame core.
-Dramatic fake death! Or is he really dead? I'm thinking fake.
-Spy cars! yeah!
-Yep: Nina: Evil. But goatee man? In on it or not?
-DEATH TO EGGS!
1X03
-Dismembered fingerprints. Awesome.
-What the hell are the terrorists yelling about? Why didn't the first girl just bring the id with her.
-Terrorists kidnapping Jack Bauer's daughter: so doomed.
-So did the news person on the phone threated David Palmer or something?
-Wow, Palmer is hardcore.
-I love this calling inside the office thing. Soon we'll never have to talk to real people!
-Personal life as a distraction. Go Jack whore, yourself, whore.
-Ooooh tattoos.
-Or he's just never had his fingerprints taken. You know, normal non-criminal people? They exist.
-EVIL LESBIANS! Oh, Fox.
-Escape that's Jack Bauer's genes coming through.
-Hooray rent boy!
-Goatee man working with Nina to fuck with Jack?
-CALL THE POLICE DUMBFUCKS.
-Dead Lesbian!
-And she's hit by a car. What the fuck Fox.
-Dammit people, that episode had a noticeable lack of Jack Bauer.
1x04.
-Fuck you Nina. Jack was doing his job.
-I love how everything is by the end of the hour! Episode television, if only you weren't so blantant.
-A lock down! Drama!
-Go Jack! Violate procedure!
-No, is Goatee and Nina just random mutual bitch fighting?
-Okay, this plotline is officially retarded. Stupid kidnappers.
-I'm actually starting to believe Nina's innocent. Well played show, well played.
-The son totally killed that guy. Totally.
-Heh. Jack gets mistaken for a terrorist all the time.
-Oh poor police woman.
-What's so special about Jack Bauer? Fool.
-Heh. They're pulling out because they found Jack. I am twelve.
It's disorienting to watch, since I recognize no one. And the show has definitely improved. So opinions: Should I finish the first season, or skip ahead and watch say, the fourth or fifth, so I'm more caught up on the current situation and characters in the new season?
I'm also trying to watch Avatar and Rome. Oh TV, why are you so awesome? I have work to do!