being nervous sucks
today was a very good day. although i had kind of a shitty sleep, i woke up semi early, enjoyed the outdoors for a brief time sitting in the backyard, played the piano and wrote down questions i wanted to ask my professor later on for our meeting. at close to 3:00 i drove up to tom's house for the first time. he lives with his friend brian's family for now but he's looking to move into his own apartment this summer (which i am very hopeful for). we hung out there for almost 2 hours and then he drove me to ramapo so i could meet with my group and professor for class. the russian girl in my group, svetlana, is nuts. she gets there late because she hit tons of traffic and when me and the rest of the group were ready to finish up and leave, she gets there and extends it for another 45 minutes. its funny to see this 30 something year old russian lady with tons of energy and beautiful looks get soooooooooo into this project....and also be the one to not understand it the most lol. i felt so bad cause i told tom we should only be there for a half hour and then svetlana's ranting made him wait longer to get dinner. after we worked some things out with our written report, we left and tom picked me up. he brought me to the Grand Lux Cafe at Garden State Plaza for dinner. it was delish and we had a great time fooling around. then we went back to his place again till 11 cause he had to get up early for work training the next day.
it was an intense night because the night before he told me he had something to tell me but he'll wait till the next day...immediately i knew he wanted to say that he loved me which sent shivers down me immediately after he said that. i was so scared of it that i was basically shivering in his arms tonight and my heart was pounding crazily. we told each other how we felt about each other and he said such really nice things to me like how he has never felt this way about anyone before to this extent and how he can act completely himself in front of me while he never could with anyone else. i told him that i cant believe how much i feel for him in only 2 months....that's when he said that he loved me. i was so scared to hear him say it and i previously wasn't sure how i felt about him but i realized that i was mostly scared of how i fell in love with someone else and only after 2 months when it took me over a year to feel that way about nick. it's probably cause we were younger, but it still scared me. so i told him i think i love him too. it was wonderful and nerve-racking and everything it should be....i love it and i hate it haha! then i talked to laura on the drive home and when i got home. i couldn't complain about one thing today :)
it was an intense night because the night before he told me he had something to tell me but he'll wait till the next day...immediately i knew he wanted to say that he loved me which sent shivers down me immediately after he said that. i was so scared of it that i was basically shivering in his arms tonight and my heart was pounding crazily. we told each other how we felt about each other and he said such really nice things to me like how he has never felt this way about anyone before to this extent and how he can act completely himself in front of me while he never could with anyone else. i told him that i cant believe how much i feel for him in only 2 months....that's when he said that he loved me. i was so scared to hear him say it and i previously wasn't sure how i felt about him but i realized that i was mostly scared of how i fell in love with someone else and only after 2 months when it took me over a year to feel that way about nick. it's probably cause we were younger, but it still scared me. so i told him i think i love him too. it was wonderful and nerve-racking and everything it should be....i love it and i hate it haha! then i talked to laura on the drive home and when i got home. i couldn't complain about one thing today :)