Let me make my own mistakes...
I wish everyone would stop worrying about me and sending their condescending comments my way. "Do whatever makes you happy"... "whatever you think is best"... I fucking will OK?
And maybe I AM wasting my time/energy for nothing.. what a couple weeks? But I've been aware of the time restriction and I've been completely content putting in the effort thus far. In fact, the time spent with him has made me quite happy.. a feeling I hadn't felt in a while until recently. And i don't regret a second of it.. even for what it was... and for the record: yes i had my daydreams and whatnot, but I have always been aware of the reality of the situation! The fact that I got hurt was not because I thought something was going on that wasn't.. necessarily. It was more the because of the betrayal on her part.
Point is: I want to enjoy the rest of the time we have left.. in whatever way that maybe. Unfortunately it can't ever be quite the same as it was. If i could erase that weekend from my memory, perhaps I would. Although I have always been a firm believe that all experiences are good for us.. they help us learn.. and to grow... even the ones we perceive as "bad."
And maybe I AM wasting my time/energy for nothing.. what a couple weeks? But I've been aware of the time restriction and I've been completely content putting in the effort thus far. In fact, the time spent with him has made me quite happy.. a feeling I hadn't felt in a while until recently. And i don't regret a second of it.. even for what it was... and for the record: yes i had my daydreams and whatnot, but I have always been aware of the reality of the situation! The fact that I got hurt was not because I thought something was going on that wasn't.. necessarily. It was more the because of the betrayal on her part.
Point is: I want to enjoy the rest of the time we have left.. in whatever way that maybe. Unfortunately it can't ever be quite the same as it was. If i could erase that weekend from my memory, perhaps I would. Although I have always been a firm believe that all experiences are good for us.. they help us learn.. and to grow... even the ones we perceive as "bad."