(no subject)
Title: Pieces
Rating: 18
Bands: Sugizo, Miyavi as well as various others.
Pairing: Sugizo x Miyavi
Summary: What do you do when your life falls apart around you and there is nothing left but broken pieces of what was? How do you rebuild when the pieces left behind no longer create the picture from before? Will the pieces that remain ever become anything of significance? You have to hope that the pieces can become a new whole because otherwise there would be no reason to go on but who said you had to reassemble your life alone?
Previous Chapters
Chapter Fifteen
Sugizo hadn't been expecting this but he was beginning to feel genuinely scared of Miyavi who's claims at being pro at archery were so far from the truth it was now laughable he had even said it. He wasn't just missing the target, he was missing with style and so far his best shot had been the only arrow to have actually hit the board at all. Even that had bounced off and now lay on the ground waiting to be collected later.
“Miyavi I think perhaps we should give up.” Sugizo suggested tactfully having run out of ideas to improve his partners aim.
“No I'll get it this time.” Miyavi declared firing an arrow that made it about four meters in front of them before lodging into the lawn.
“You've said that about every arrow you've fired.” Sugizo scolded. “I don't think this is your thing.”
“But it makes me sexy right?” Miyavi asked with a cheeky smile.
“Well it was at first, now it's terrifying. You're going to break something eventually.” Sugizo scolded.
“You're just a rubbish teacher.” Miyavi complained pushing the bow into Sugizo hands and going to collect the arrows from around the archery range. Sugizo felt bad that this activity had failed so badly but these things happened. At least Miyavi had fun for a bit, before he realised he wasn't picking this up at all.
Sugizo went to help collect the arrows and when they were done he wrapped his arm around Miyavi and gave him a gentle kiss concerned that the other was feeling bad. Today was supposed to be about making Miyavi happy but he was beginning to wonder if there was anything he could do to achieve this goal.
“Shall we go for a walk?” Sugizo suggested.
“OK.” Miyavi agreed quietly walking beside Sugizo frustrated by his fail. This was far from what Sugizo had wanted for this day but his other activities were for later. What could he and Miyavi talk about that would make the other feel better? Well there was one thing that Miyavi wanted, his secrets, but which one could he share when Miyavi was sulking?
“You know you're not the first man to have been in my bed.” Sugizo commented knowing this was a risky strategy and hoping this wouldn't back fire on him.
“Oh?” Miyavi asked, curious and not jealous which was a good start.
“I had my first boyfriend when I was sixteen.” Sugizo explained. “Though it was an innocent love really. It just kind of happened, like us he was my friend and then it became more. He was my first love and one night he was over for a sleepover. Nobody thought anything of two guys sharing a bed, my parents didn't know I was bi at the time and really we were both so young and the relationship was so tentative I wonder if it would have gone anywhere at all. As it was my Mother walked in on us kissing and was so angry that the guy was too scared to be around me. I don't blame him, she scared me too and on that night I promised her I'd never date a man. I'd never bring shame on the family. I'd always pick a girl as my date. Through it all I never broke that promise until now. You're special in every way. I just wanted you to know this.”
“That's the first time you've shared anything without being asked.” Miyavi commented.
“Well you were miserable, I needed to cheer you up somehow.” Sugizo explained. “I promised today was about making you happy and I failed miserably.”
“You didn't.” Miyavi exclaimed. “I had fun for a bit, it's not your fault I was so bad. Is this because I called you a bad teacher?”
“No.” Sugizo replied even though it was, just a little.
“Well anyway I'm going to continue to sulk so you'll tell me more.” Miyavi declared. “I want another story.”
“What about?” Sugizo asked.
“I don't know, something important.” Miyavi declared.
“Let's see...” Sugizo said thoughtfully. “My first male crush was on the rock star hide. Did you see the poster on my wall?”
“Yeah, he's a sexy man.” Miyavi agreed. “You have good taste there.”
“I liked him from when I was young, around eleven but I only realised what my feelings were at about thirteen.” Sugizo replied. “Even then I ignored them because I was brought up to believe these feelings were wrong, even evil.”
“Do you feel that way now?” Miyavi asked.
“If it's wrong it's one of my most harmless sins.” Sugizo decided. “If it's evil then I shall be a demon, I won't give you up.”
“Because you love me?” Miyavi asked startling Sugizo. Did he love Miyavi? As a friend there was no doubt but that wasn't what Miyavi was asking.
“Maybe, I don't know.” Sugizo admitted. “I know I love and care for you, but in love is a different matter.”
“I love you.” Miyavi admitted making Sugizo feel like the luckiest man on earth. How could he be with Miyavi when he was so selfish and cruel, he wasn't even sure he loved Miyavi and yet here the other was confessing to him meaning exactly what he said. “but if you don't love me yet that's OK.”
“It's not OK. You deserve to be with someone who loves and adores you.” Sugizo complained.
“You love and adore me.” Miyavi replied confidentially. “And you might not be sure but I am, it's romantic.”
The couple left the house around late afternoon heading for a shopping centre where Sugizo could visit a sex shop and Miyavi could find something to buy his girls who expected a present from him. Their choice of shops couldn't be any more different and they split up as Sugizo really wanted his purchasers to be a surprise. He wasn't at all ashamed to be browsing the dildos section but this wasn't really what he wanted, he had his own body to pleasure Miyavi in that way, why use anything artificial? He wanted something he himself couldn't do and his eyes soon fell on the perfect toy. Now that he could use and he picked it up adding some lube, they'd been getting through that quickly, and some flavoured condoms and cleaning wipes into his small pile of things to buy. Really he could stay here all day but Miyavi was waiting for him so he went to pay idly picking up some handcuffs on his way to the till though he wasn't sure if Miyavi would allow him to use them.
The shop girl was young and not as tactful as she should be clearly having some dirty thoughts about what Sugizo was planning to get up to and he deliberately played along asking questions until she was blushing bright red. He could be so cruel but if you weren't comfortable talking about sex you shouldn't be working here.
Leaving the shop he saw Miyavi waiting about fifty meters away and he headed over carrying the plain black bag as if it contained nothing out of the ordinary at all. He could tell Miyavi was curious but he didn't ask and Sugizo wouldn't show, not yet.
“Did you get something?” Sugizo asked and Miyavi nodded pulling out a stuffed unicorn and a tiger from the bag he was now carrying. “Cute.” he said grinning.
“Problem is even so young they both know exactly how to get what they want out of me.” Miyavi complained.
“Oh?” Sugizo asked. “Perhaps I should ask them for lessons.”
“Like you need them.” Miyavi complained. “You're as bad as they are.”
“Then where's my toy?” Sugizo asked. “I feel like everyone is getting one but me.”
“You're too old for toys.” Miyavi teased his eyes falling once again on the bag.
“Don't be silly.” Sugizo argued. “You're never too old.”
“Yeah I'm never too old, but you are.” Miyavi declared.
“Respect your elders.” Sugizo complained realising Miyavi wasn't listening, his eyes were glued to a shop window.
“I'll buy you that.” Miyavi declared though Sugizo wasn't sure entirely what Miyavi was planning. He followed warily surprised when a leather jacket was offered to him. He studied it realising that it was exactly the kind of coat he would have bought himself, stylish and elegant and fitted like a woman’s jacket would be but still managing to remain it's masculinity. He tried it on staring at the mirror admiring himself catching Miyavi's gaze in the mirror and smiling. This coat was perfect and he could tell already expensive.
“Miyavi I can't let you buy this.” Sugizo complained.
“Well it's not like you can stop me.” Miyavi declared grabbing a second coat of the same size and heading towards the register. With a sigh Sugizo returned the original coat to the shelf and accepted the gift with a smile.
“Really what have I done to deserve this?” Sugizo complained though he felt more than pleased by this surprise gift.
“You know why. But more than that I owe you so much, you're always treating me and buying me things. It's about time I paid something back.” Miyavi explained.
“Well don't even think about paying for dinner.” Sugizo warned clutching his two shopping bags tightly. One contained a gift that he would cherish always, the other contained the means too truly thank Miyavi for the present though it was a shame he couldn't thank Miyavi here, he couldn't even kiss him and whilst he knew those were his restrictions and not his lovers he was frustrated that they were even there. Life wasn't fair but sometimes it could be kind, he had Miyavi in his life which was more than he believed he deserved.
Rating: 18
Bands: Sugizo, Miyavi as well as various others.
Pairing: Sugizo x Miyavi
Summary: What do you do when your life falls apart around you and there is nothing left but broken pieces of what was? How do you rebuild when the pieces left behind no longer create the picture from before? Will the pieces that remain ever become anything of significance? You have to hope that the pieces can become a new whole because otherwise there would be no reason to go on but who said you had to reassemble your life alone?
Previous Chapters
Chapter Fifteen
Sugizo hadn't been expecting this but he was beginning to feel genuinely scared of Miyavi who's claims at being pro at archery were so far from the truth it was now laughable he had even said it. He wasn't just missing the target, he was missing with style and so far his best shot had been the only arrow to have actually hit the board at all. Even that had bounced off and now lay on the ground waiting to be collected later.
“Miyavi I think perhaps we should give up.” Sugizo suggested tactfully having run out of ideas to improve his partners aim.
“No I'll get it this time.” Miyavi declared firing an arrow that made it about four meters in front of them before lodging into the lawn.
“You've said that about every arrow you've fired.” Sugizo scolded. “I don't think this is your thing.”
“But it makes me sexy right?” Miyavi asked with a cheeky smile.
“Well it was at first, now it's terrifying. You're going to break something eventually.” Sugizo scolded.
“You're just a rubbish teacher.” Miyavi complained pushing the bow into Sugizo hands and going to collect the arrows from around the archery range. Sugizo felt bad that this activity had failed so badly but these things happened. At least Miyavi had fun for a bit, before he realised he wasn't picking this up at all.
Sugizo went to help collect the arrows and when they were done he wrapped his arm around Miyavi and gave him a gentle kiss concerned that the other was feeling bad. Today was supposed to be about making Miyavi happy but he was beginning to wonder if there was anything he could do to achieve this goal.
“Shall we go for a walk?” Sugizo suggested.
“OK.” Miyavi agreed quietly walking beside Sugizo frustrated by his fail. This was far from what Sugizo had wanted for this day but his other activities were for later. What could he and Miyavi talk about that would make the other feel better? Well there was one thing that Miyavi wanted, his secrets, but which one could he share when Miyavi was sulking?
“You know you're not the first man to have been in my bed.” Sugizo commented knowing this was a risky strategy and hoping this wouldn't back fire on him.
“Oh?” Miyavi asked, curious and not jealous which was a good start.
“I had my first boyfriend when I was sixteen.” Sugizo explained. “Though it was an innocent love really. It just kind of happened, like us he was my friend and then it became more. He was my first love and one night he was over for a sleepover. Nobody thought anything of two guys sharing a bed, my parents didn't know I was bi at the time and really we were both so young and the relationship was so tentative I wonder if it would have gone anywhere at all. As it was my Mother walked in on us kissing and was so angry that the guy was too scared to be around me. I don't blame him, she scared me too and on that night I promised her I'd never date a man. I'd never bring shame on the family. I'd always pick a girl as my date. Through it all I never broke that promise until now. You're special in every way. I just wanted you to know this.”
“That's the first time you've shared anything without being asked.” Miyavi commented.
“Well you were miserable, I needed to cheer you up somehow.” Sugizo explained. “I promised today was about making you happy and I failed miserably.”
“You didn't.” Miyavi exclaimed. “I had fun for a bit, it's not your fault I was so bad. Is this because I called you a bad teacher?”
“No.” Sugizo replied even though it was, just a little.
“Well anyway I'm going to continue to sulk so you'll tell me more.” Miyavi declared. “I want another story.”
“What about?” Sugizo asked.
“I don't know, something important.” Miyavi declared.
“Let's see...” Sugizo said thoughtfully. “My first male crush was on the rock star hide. Did you see the poster on my wall?”
“Yeah, he's a sexy man.” Miyavi agreed. “You have good taste there.”
“I liked him from when I was young, around eleven but I only realised what my feelings were at about thirteen.” Sugizo replied. “Even then I ignored them because I was brought up to believe these feelings were wrong, even evil.”
“Do you feel that way now?” Miyavi asked.
“If it's wrong it's one of my most harmless sins.” Sugizo decided. “If it's evil then I shall be a demon, I won't give you up.”
“Because you love me?” Miyavi asked startling Sugizo. Did he love Miyavi? As a friend there was no doubt but that wasn't what Miyavi was asking.
“Maybe, I don't know.” Sugizo admitted. “I know I love and care for you, but in love is a different matter.”
“I love you.” Miyavi admitted making Sugizo feel like the luckiest man on earth. How could he be with Miyavi when he was so selfish and cruel, he wasn't even sure he loved Miyavi and yet here the other was confessing to him meaning exactly what he said. “but if you don't love me yet that's OK.”
“It's not OK. You deserve to be with someone who loves and adores you.” Sugizo complained.
“You love and adore me.” Miyavi replied confidentially. “And you might not be sure but I am, it's romantic.”
The couple left the house around late afternoon heading for a shopping centre where Sugizo could visit a sex shop and Miyavi could find something to buy his girls who expected a present from him. Their choice of shops couldn't be any more different and they split up as Sugizo really wanted his purchasers to be a surprise. He wasn't at all ashamed to be browsing the dildos section but this wasn't really what he wanted, he had his own body to pleasure Miyavi in that way, why use anything artificial? He wanted something he himself couldn't do and his eyes soon fell on the perfect toy. Now that he could use and he picked it up adding some lube, they'd been getting through that quickly, and some flavoured condoms and cleaning wipes into his small pile of things to buy. Really he could stay here all day but Miyavi was waiting for him so he went to pay idly picking up some handcuffs on his way to the till though he wasn't sure if Miyavi would allow him to use them.
The shop girl was young and not as tactful as she should be clearly having some dirty thoughts about what Sugizo was planning to get up to and he deliberately played along asking questions until she was blushing bright red. He could be so cruel but if you weren't comfortable talking about sex you shouldn't be working here.
Leaving the shop he saw Miyavi waiting about fifty meters away and he headed over carrying the plain black bag as if it contained nothing out of the ordinary at all. He could tell Miyavi was curious but he didn't ask and Sugizo wouldn't show, not yet.
“Did you get something?” Sugizo asked and Miyavi nodded pulling out a stuffed unicorn and a tiger from the bag he was now carrying. “Cute.” he said grinning.
“Problem is even so young they both know exactly how to get what they want out of me.” Miyavi complained.
“Oh?” Sugizo asked. “Perhaps I should ask them for lessons.”
“Like you need them.” Miyavi complained. “You're as bad as they are.”
“Then where's my toy?” Sugizo asked. “I feel like everyone is getting one but me.”
“You're too old for toys.” Miyavi teased his eyes falling once again on the bag.
“Don't be silly.” Sugizo argued. “You're never too old.”
“Yeah I'm never too old, but you are.” Miyavi declared.
“Respect your elders.” Sugizo complained realising Miyavi wasn't listening, his eyes were glued to a shop window.
“I'll buy you that.” Miyavi declared though Sugizo wasn't sure entirely what Miyavi was planning. He followed warily surprised when a leather jacket was offered to him. He studied it realising that it was exactly the kind of coat he would have bought himself, stylish and elegant and fitted like a woman’s jacket would be but still managing to remain it's masculinity. He tried it on staring at the mirror admiring himself catching Miyavi's gaze in the mirror and smiling. This coat was perfect and he could tell already expensive.
“Miyavi I can't let you buy this.” Sugizo complained.
“Well it's not like you can stop me.” Miyavi declared grabbing a second coat of the same size and heading towards the register. With a sigh Sugizo returned the original coat to the shelf and accepted the gift with a smile.
“Really what have I done to deserve this?” Sugizo complained though he felt more than pleased by this surprise gift.
“You know why. But more than that I owe you so much, you're always treating me and buying me things. It's about time I paid something back.” Miyavi explained.
“Well don't even think about paying for dinner.” Sugizo warned clutching his two shopping bags tightly. One contained a gift that he would cherish always, the other contained the means too truly thank Miyavi for the present though it was a shame he couldn't thank Miyavi here, he couldn't even kiss him and whilst he knew those were his restrictions and not his lovers he was frustrated that they were even there. Life wasn't fair but sometimes it could be kind, he had Miyavi in his life which was more than he believed he deserved.