In case you're dying to know what's been going on with me lately (yeah right)
I seriously need to have nothing to do for a while. Yes, school ends on Wednesday, but I start work on Thursday so that's not going to be very easy. I'm so far behind (STILL) that I just don't know what to do.
Here's what I should have done today:
~Rough draft of final English paper
~Clean clean clean (because once again this apartment is absolutely disgusting... ewww, there was a cockroach in the kitchen half an hour ago and that isn't the first one in this house)
~Finish watching "how to teach class" DVDs and learn lesson plans
~Go to take my CS midterm/quiz thingie
~Turn in my GEL paper
Here's what I actually did today:
~Woke up in time for my midterm and decided I was too depressed to go
~Read 8 BSC books
~Took a nap from like 10-12
~Took a nap from like 5-9
~Stared at the ceiling feeling sorry for myself
~Wrote in my journal
~Wasted like 5 hours on the internet doing nothing
~Invented the French roll/provolone/bacon sandwich (which is extremely yummy)
~Stayed up all night (once again) reading/feeling pathetic
Well, I did watch about 20 minutes of the how to teach DVD (I'm sure Natalie must have thought I was completely sane, watching 6 adults in a bare carpeted room sing "Baa Baa Black Sleep" with every color of the rainbow...) and I DID finish all but one of the BSC books I brought up here. So at least... um... I enjoyed myself? No, not really. I can't stop thinking about what happened last night, even though it's no big deal. Since I know people are going to be like "wtf cryptic" about that, it's not THAT exciting. Just my old jealous self, cuddle parties, and drinking too much. Be Nancy Drew and figure it out.
And once again my eating habits are sucking. I'm sure I've gained back those 8 pounds I lost last month. Maybe I'll cancel the swimming part of my birthday party, or everyone else (because my friends all look great in swimsuits compared to me) can swim and I'll just hang out. That is, unless I can somehow miraculously lose a dress size and erase stretch marks in two weeks. Uh... less. My birthday is now in five days. It doesn't feel like it. It doesn't feel like June.
It's hard because I KNOW the reason I'm overreacting and being really depressed is because of timing, not actual depression. I'm stressed out, things aren't working as well as I'd like, the weather absolutely sucks monkey balls up here (I cannot WAIT for Dublin), I don't get a break at all this summer (like I said, last day of school is the day before first day of work... NOT including finals) and I am so freaking sick of Davis it's not even funny. I'm tired of living somewhere that has cockroaches, burned out lightbulbs, disgusting carpet, a completely useless shower room (okay, ours doesn't have a fan, but at least we have a WINDOW), dirty everything, mismatching furniture, hideously loud neighbors (yes, STILL... I'm getting better at ignoring them but still), and is on the stupid second floor. I hate stairs. I have lived in one-story places my entire life and I don't like living with stairs now. Heat rises, and therefore my room is a sauna if a computer or light is left on. My computer HAS to be on because it creates internet sharing for me to use my laptop downstairs (where it's only 100 degrees instead of 300) but it heats up the room and just... argh! I was going to say I'm tired of crappy internet connection, but, as lame as our service is, it's about 20X more reliable than the DSL at my own house right now for some reason. "Right now" being last time I was home, of course.
Oh yeah, and there's the PMS factor. I won't go into TMI with y'all, but of course this year, due to stress, things have been going pretty crazy so I never know WHAT to expect. Which explains my often-foul mood. That, plus the fact that I have like no social life up here... argh. I mean, yeah, I have friends, but not friends I would trust with my life, y'know? Friends who don't actually care about me and put me down to try and better themselves. I hate that. At home, I have people who actually understand me and whom I can talk to and not feel the need to impress them.
Also, okay, I edited the time a little bit... I really started this entry at 6:02 but I changed it to say 6:06, so I wrote an entry at 6:06 on 6-6-06. =) OMG I'M TEH DEVILLLZ.
Whatever. Davis, hurry up and get out of my life. I don't want you anymore. Take your stupid band and chorus and chamber singers and weather and classrooms and music department and GO AWAY. Seriously. Pretty much the only thing I like about Davis at all is Sami, and I haven't seen her for two weeks and I miss her. =(
Maybe I should try and get some sleep. It's 6:30ish now. I have class in four hours. Pff. Like I'll go. I just don't care anymore.
Here's what I should have done today:
~Rough draft of final English paper
~Clean clean clean (because once again this apartment is absolutely disgusting... ewww, there was a cockroach in the kitchen half an hour ago and that isn't the first one in this house)
~Finish watching "how to teach class" DVDs and learn lesson plans
~Go to take my CS midterm/quiz thingie
~Turn in my GEL paper
Here's what I actually did today:
~Woke up in time for my midterm and decided I was too depressed to go
~Read 8 BSC books
~Took a nap from like 10-12
~Took a nap from like 5-9
~Stared at the ceiling feeling sorry for myself
~Wrote in my journal
~Wasted like 5 hours on the internet doing nothing
~Invented the French roll/provolone/bacon sandwich (which is extremely yummy)
~Stayed up all night (once again) reading/feeling pathetic
Well, I did watch about 20 minutes of the how to teach DVD (I'm sure Natalie must have thought I was completely sane, watching 6 adults in a bare carpeted room sing "Baa Baa Black Sleep" with every color of the rainbow...) and I DID finish all but one of the BSC books I brought up here. So at least... um... I enjoyed myself? No, not really. I can't stop thinking about what happened last night, even though it's no big deal. Since I know people are going to be like "wtf cryptic" about that, it's not THAT exciting. Just my old jealous self, cuddle parties, and drinking too much. Be Nancy Drew and figure it out.
And once again my eating habits are sucking. I'm sure I've gained back those 8 pounds I lost last month. Maybe I'll cancel the swimming part of my birthday party, or everyone else (because my friends all look great in swimsuits compared to me) can swim and I'll just hang out. That is, unless I can somehow miraculously lose a dress size and erase stretch marks in two weeks. Uh... less. My birthday is now in five days. It doesn't feel like it. It doesn't feel like June.
It's hard because I KNOW the reason I'm overreacting and being really depressed is because of timing, not actual depression. I'm stressed out, things aren't working as well as I'd like, the weather absolutely sucks monkey balls up here (I cannot WAIT for Dublin), I don't get a break at all this summer (like I said, last day of school is the day before first day of work... NOT including finals) and I am so freaking sick of Davis it's not even funny. I'm tired of living somewhere that has cockroaches, burned out lightbulbs, disgusting carpet, a completely useless shower room (okay, ours doesn't have a fan, but at least we have a WINDOW), dirty everything, mismatching furniture, hideously loud neighbors (yes, STILL... I'm getting better at ignoring them but still), and is on the stupid second floor. I hate stairs. I have lived in one-story places my entire life and I don't like living with stairs now. Heat rises, and therefore my room is a sauna if a computer or light is left on. My computer HAS to be on because it creates internet sharing for me to use my laptop downstairs (where it's only 100 degrees instead of 300) but it heats up the room and just... argh! I was going to say I'm tired of crappy internet connection, but, as lame as our service is, it's about 20X more reliable than the DSL at my own house right now for some reason. "Right now" being last time I was home, of course.
Oh yeah, and there's the PMS factor. I won't go into TMI with y'all, but of course this year, due to stress, things have been going pretty crazy so I never know WHAT to expect. Which explains my often-foul mood. That, plus the fact that I have like no social life up here... argh. I mean, yeah, I have friends, but not friends I would trust with my life, y'know? Friends who don't actually care about me and put me down to try and better themselves. I hate that. At home, I have people who actually understand me and whom I can talk to and not feel the need to impress them.
Also, okay, I edited the time a little bit... I really started this entry at 6:02 but I changed it to say 6:06, so I wrote an entry at 6:06 on 6-6-06. =) OMG I'M TEH DEVILLLZ.
Whatever. Davis, hurry up and get out of my life. I don't want you anymore. Take your stupid band and chorus and chamber singers and weather and classrooms and music department and GO AWAY. Seriously. Pretty much the only thing I like about Davis at all is Sami, and I haven't seen her for two weeks and I miss her. =(
Maybe I should try and get some sleep. It's 6:30ish now. I have class in four hours. Pff. Like I'll go. I just don't care anymore.