Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!
Tarkine attacked my face this morning. I have two cuts underneath my upper lip, a scratch cross my upper lip to the skin below my nose and a scractch on my cheek. It was about 7am at the little bastard wanted to play, so he dropped one of his toy mice on my face and then pounced. So, ok it isn't really attacking me, but it scared the beejesus out of me. I woke up to find this cat on my face and blood dripping on my pillow. I pushed him off and went back to sleep, thinking it was only a little cut cos even the tiniest of razor-kitty scratches bleed much more than a scratch it's size warrants. When I got up to brush my teeth, they were coated in my blood and I had blood-crust on my lower lip. Pretty nasty. I look like a domestic violence victim. All during my morning tutorial, Dr Couper was staring at my face. As we left he told me that if I needed help/assistance I could always go to him because he is "experienced more than you might imagine, in dealing with such things". I wanted to ask if that meant he boffed his wife in the chops, but I thought the truth would be better so I told him how it really happened. He looked at me as though I was on crack and his eyes kinda had that look of "poor thing doing her best to hide the painful truth" and patted me on the shoulder. Hahahaha. Truth is usually stranger than fiction.